Day 96 Sunday Mind

4/6/2025

Sunday is my second favorite day of the week, Shabbat my favorite, both days of rest from all work. I have the best of both worlds - Gentile and Jewish. I welcomed the day and thanked Abba for the new day. I fed the cat and said "good morning" to my son. We even played around with our little (stuffed) Grinch, animating the grouchy little fellow and bantering playfully back and forth. Silly little game we play that may seem childish, but we need to be childish some days, most days. I snagged some coffee and headed back to my room to spend some quiet time with Abba before the true start of my day. I've spoken of the time I spend alone with God, listening, worshiping, and studying the Bible. This is important for my day, and for my life as my desire is to grow closer to Him. When I got back in my room, I don't know what happened, but I felt so confused. All these disturbing thoughts were going through my head, and I just seemed confused. I remembered the dream I was having about having to start and stop whatever I was doing, and start again. There was a long line of work stations, and I would go to one, then the next, and on and on, never really finishing the one before. I couldn't remember all of it, but it seems as if something was missing or something amidst. My mind got jumbled from the previous night, wondering, as always, what some of my dreams were about.

Later, I began thinking about the blog I had posted the night before, as I was finishing up another one for the next day. I had gotten behind, and my notes on each day seemed confusing to me. This has never happened to me to this extent, not since my last blow to the head. I thought I had forgotten a day, and I thought I'd mixed up the posts from the actual days. I had my notes for each blog, but I had not been able to find the time to just finish it. I was a mess! I tried talking to my son, Daniel, and I think he became concerned about my mental health. So I decided to just take my shower and get ready for church, as the prayer call would begin soon, and I wanted to be ready to leave for church services right after the meeting. It's such a beautiful day, I thought the walk to church would do me good. Clear my head!

I sorted out my mess with the blogs, and I discovered that I had put my cleaning blip on the wrong day, but that wasn't a big deal, as it fit into what I was writing and added a bit of whimsy. I always have crazy thoughts as it is. I fumbled my way through the prayer call, and afterwards, I walked to church without falling into a ditch or being hit by a car or truck. I even crossed the highway without stopping traffic. Pastor John has been teaching from Galatians, and this will be my third study of the book this year. I should be an expert by the time we're finished. There are so many events going on at the church that that confuses me. But all is well. After I returned home, I had some time to rest a bit, eat a little and think about my debacle over my memory. I realized that I have not eaten well for two days, and my body and mind have been effected. From now on, I am going to ensure that I have something ready before I go to services, because I have multiple things to do. Now at the end of the day, I am finishing the blog of the day on the right day, relating the correct thoughts. I'm sure I left something out, but there's always another day, or so I hope.

Day 95 Shabbat Shalom

4/5/2025 

I'm always saying that God is on the move, and I must say that each day it becomes more and more obvious that He is purifying His church, preparing His bride to do the work we were put here to do until His return. The Jerusalem Prayer Breakfast is an annual global gathering of government, civic, and religious leaders from around the world who meet together in Jerusalem to pray for peace and solidarity, seeking solutions for global challenges. It was organized in 2017 by Albert Veksler, CEO who wanted to see Christians and Jews working together to strengthen and encourage one another while working for the common good. Michele Bachmann, former United States Congresswoman and current Dean of Robertson School of Government and Knesset Member Robert Ilatov co-chair the organization. One of our panelists in the GPG prayer call today had just attended the breakfast held in Norway, where antisemitism has risen high, but at this meeting the Norwegian church and courts came together to make a stand of solidarity with Israel, seeking repentance for the sins of Norway and declaring that they want to go the other way and stand with Israel. Other countries were present who also came to stand in the gap for Israel, seeking forgiveness for the sins of their nations. Repentance is the first step to reconciliation and wholeness which then leads to transformation and healing, then sparks revival. This is so badly needed in this world today. If each of us would have this heart, a broken and contrite heart, asking God for forgiveness, things would change.

Once again, Shabbat service at my online fellowship, Jacob's Tent, held surprises. Paul Wilbur and his wife Luane, were visiting, and Paul participated in worship, then shared the message with us. He and Luane will be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary this week, and they are taking Bill and Beth with them on a secret getaway, a time of rest, refreshment and friendship. Bill is our shepherd, although he does not like to be called anything except "Bill." Paul was joking about that, because he's not our pastor, although he is, and he is not our Rabbi, but he is, and I doubt he'd even like the word shepherd, but since sheep are lowly, stubborn, and not too bright, how can he argue?!

Paul brought the fellowship a report on the Jewish Lemba Tribe in Zimbabwe, who are part of my family. They have dug 84 wells, each one serving a community of 10,000 people, including Muslims. The wells are dug near the schools, as I have mentioned in a previous blog, so the children don't have to walk so far looking for water that is polluted anyway. This is clean, fresh water. Such a blessing. They'll be going to visit the tribe soon, and they will be taking others with them. I'd love to go, but I'll hang on to the dream.

Paul also said that he'd been awakened around 3 am this morning, and Holy Spirit had changed the direction of his message. Bill also had been awakened, and he went outside and paced up and down the woods, praying. The message was about repentance. Last Shabbat, the Lord had moved on the congregation in a mighty way resulting in seeking forgiveness from others. Repentance is a beautiful gift of the Lord, and we need to exercise that gift each day. Bill had not had a chance to mention last weekend to Paul yet, so this was an appointed time. Jesus is returning soon for His bride, and we must be ready with clean hands and pure hearts. 

Next weekend will be Passover, and prior to this holy remembrance of Israel's deliverance from Egypt, the house must be cleaned and swept of any leaven. In Biblical times the Lord instructed the people not to use leaven to rise the bread, because they had to eat the Passover meal quickly, and there was no time to let the bread rise. Remember the blood of the sacrificial lamb had to be placed over the doorways and lintels of the home, so the death angel would pass by, hence "Passover." The Jewish people still observe this law today. I believe some of the Messianic believers also follow the tradition to remember and show honor to God. I am learning and observing, but the food is my challenge. I need to focus on baking some of their goodies. I don't think I have much leaven around. Maybe some packets of yeast and baking soda, but I don't think I will go that far. I need to get rid of the dust balls first, I think. 

Passover marks the beginning of the new year for the Israel. I must admit that I get confused with having two calendars, the Jewish calendar and the Gregorian calendar. One day we'll only go by God's time - eternity. What a glorious day that will be. It's also a time when the flowers bloom, and everything is fresh and alive. The smell of the earth is so wonderful. The Lord promises in His word that when Israel is restored, the land will flourish with lush meadows and brilliant colors, fruit on the trees. We have already seen this happening, even in the time of war. Certain areas near the kibbutz were untouched by the battle and the horror. The Lord is good, and He is faithful to his promise to Israel. 

Shabbat Shalom.

Day 94 Victory

4/4/2025

Today the Jerusalem Marathon 2025 will be held in Israel, and I understand that 40,000 people are participating this year. Among those who will be running will be former hostage Karina Ariev, who was released from Hamas captivity on January 25, 2025 after spending 477 days in the tunnels in Gaza. She began the race encouraging the runners by saying, "As you run, feel the freedom, the comforting embrace of your surroundings." She will be running in the 5K race along with Jerusalem Mayor Moshe Lion who shared: “In these challenging times, we choose life. We choose to run,” he said. “Many runners participate to honor a cause, in solidarity with hostages and bereaved families.”

 "But to you who fear My name the Sun of Righteousness

shall arise with healing in His wings; and you shall go out

and grow fat like stall-fed calves." 

Malachi 4:2

In spite of all the horror, with resulting trauma, experienced by the hostages who have been freed, who are sharing their stories, hope still runs deep, as they attempt to begin their lives again, rebuilding, healing, and waiting for the release of all the hostages. The Israeli people are a rare breed of people, blessed by God, who mourn when others mourn, and to laugh when others laugh. In spite of hardship, pain, struggle, Israel stands steadfast, and her friends stand with her. Runners from more than 50 countries to include Kenya, South Sudan, and Morocco joined the race this year marking a new high in participation.

Passover begins next weekend, and then Easter is celebrated the next. There's something special this year in the way God aligned the calendar so that Resurrection Sunday and Passover coincide. I know He is on the move for a mighty work, and I remain expectant. Passover is a time to remember the exodus of the children of Israel from the slavery of Egypt. It also commemorates Jesus as the sacrificial Lamb given to save us from sin and death. Jesus was our Passover Lamb. Easter is His resurrection, and we, as believers remember we are now alive in Christ. So, this week I have a Passover meal to plan, plus a Seder if I decide to do it again this year. I may leave off the horse radish, as it was not a favorite last time. I have been considering going to a local synagogue Seder, but again, I am deciding, as I don't know anyone. I celebrate Resurrection Sunday differently from others, as I don't like Easter egg hunts, but I will have a nice dinner. We're not very elegant around here, but on special days, I clean off mama's china and glassware, and even may use cloth napkins. Even if the only guests are my son and I we will celebrate the resurrection of our Savior and Lord with songs of praise and hallelujahs on our lips. My prayer is that all of Israel will be blessed by the release of their dear ones, and I pray that all will come to salvation through Jesus Christ our Lord, our Messiah. What a glorious day it will be!

 

Day 93 Resting Place

 4/3/2025

 "There are times when to speak is to violate the moment...

when silence represents the highest respect. The word for such times is

reverence. The prayer for such times is 'Hallowed by Thy Name.'"

Max Lucado

Once more our Global Prayer Gathering brought a smile to my face. Our leader has been hosting Thursday morning calls once again, even though his healing is not yet complete. He always lights up my heart, as his wisdom and discernment is so clear and deep, and his closeness to God is so obvious. This morning his teenage daughter presented our worship songs, and her sweet voice reminds me of her mother. There was a praise report right at the start, as we heard of a recent retreat and how God is moving to bring unity within the Messianic and Arab Christians in Israel. My heart is always lifted when I hear of brethren walking in unity together. What a world we would have if everyone followed suit!

Joshua, who is over the prayer ministry, shared about a local retreat held for pastors called Sitting at Yeshua's Feet. As I said, it was a gathering of pastors from the Messianic and Arab Christian churches in Israel for a time to share their experiences during this war. Josh shared a vision he had during one of the sessions. He said he saw a man's back, open for surgery on the spinal column, the vertebrae needing fusion. Then he saw a hand reach down and begin the process of repairing it. He said it was if God was doing surgery on the participants at the retreat and within the church, knitting the vertebrae or fusing the vertebrae back together into one strong, whole column - unified. As I thought about it, with my medical mind, I saw the nerve plexus extending off the spinal cord. The nerves in a human spinal cord branch off into organs of the body and the extremities and innervate the muscles and cells to produce responses and functioning of the individual parts, so they function symbiotically. It reminded me of the description of the functioning of the church, the body of Christ that Paul mentions in 1 Corinthians. Each member of the church body has a function, a purpose, a gift, and just like the human body, each part works together for the good of the entire body. We cannot function properly if our toe is sore, as it affects the foot, and if painful, it can affect the entire body, and so it is with every tissue, organ, cell, and extremity. God knie us together, according to Psalm 139, in an extremely intricate fashion. What a masterpiece. Each member of the body of Christ works together, each one with an individual gift and calling that joins the church together, functioning in unity. This is what Josh's vision called to my mind. How wonderful will it be when churches work together for the common good, sharing love, like brothers and sisters who love the Lord should. It reminds me of the early church in Acts, and I believe that is what God had in mind. 

This report confirmed the prayer points for our meeting, plus it spurred the exhortation to participants on the call to be focused on what was being discussed and praying along with the one praying to be united and agreed in prayer. Staying on topic is not something that has been happening on this call for a very long time, and I had been turning off the chat on my end, as it was irritating to me. I feel it is disrespectful to have a free for all during a prayer service. But then it seems that this is a common thread in many other meetings, during Sunday services even, when people are talking, drinking beverages and eating food, on their cell phones, during the service. I have even observed this behavior by pastors and elders during prayer. I am not a fan of cell phones in the meetings especially church services. I think a Bible should be carried in one's hand into a meeting, rather than using a cell phone or i-pad or any device. I understand the value of them being used where it is dangerous to be caught with a Bible, but I think we take it too far. I just received an article from a spiritual leader I know that said the material had been AI generated. This is dangerous, and I do not feel that it is God inspired. I am grateful for leaders who exhort their followers to behave honorably and respectfully. I was beginning to think I was an old grouch who was just being "me." Thankfully, God felt the same way.

It's interesting that recently I've seen many discussions among friends on the discipleship site I use in conjunction with my group I host, where the questions pertain to appropriate or Bible response to various situations. I hope we all learn from scripture how God views things, and we receive the godly response so our behavior is as unto the Lord. People are watching our reactions. I have my own challenges that I have mentioned in previous posts along these lines, but the best defense is to remain in the word and abide in Christ's presence. Finding our resting place and doing everything to ensure that it is a consistent part of our lives. There are people who actually schedule quiet time, but I let God create that deep desire within me, so much so that I cannot wait to talk to Him in the morning, spend time with Him in my day, discuss everything, even the mundane or crazy ideas I get in head from time to time. He cares about everything. Yesterday He helped me clean the living room, and we even watched a bit of Ant Man while we cleaned house. He's partial to Marvel, I think, but, like me, He's disappointed that they killed off Iron Man. Not a great idea. I'm just being silly, I hope you know, but realize that Holy Spirit does dwell within the heart of the believer, so we need to examine everything we do each day. Asking ourselves "Does this honor God? Or is it taking time away from spending quality time with Him?" Examining the heart is a good thing, a practical thing. I do not want to be an unsuspecting idol worshiper.

Let's maintain the focus and keep it on the Author and Finisher of our faith, resting in the safety of His arms.

 

Day 92 Anchor for the Soul

4/2/2025 

 We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. 

It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain.

Hebrews 6:19

 

My heart is always burdened with the needs of our nation and world. I've been trying to stand in the gap, supporting anyone who needs help or encouragement for more years than I can tell. I see a need, I receive an email, or see a news bulletin, or an alert, and instantly I'm transported to the point of origin. I am able to "see" many things others cannot, and this can become a burden at times, because as I have said before, the mind cannot unsee what one sees. The other day I found an article about a young college student in Pittsburg University who had been abducted off the beach where she and friends were vacationing in the Dominican Republic on March 6, 2025. Surveillance cameras showing her leaving with a man. Tonight I heard her parents asking to have her declared dead, as they needed closure in their lives. Her mother was in tears, as her husband spoke before a crowd. She was studying to be a doctor.

Over the years my compassion for others has grown more deeply, and I am able to forgive and forget more easily. The pain I once experienced is no longer there. I only see how blessed and sheltered I have been in spite of the obvious trauma and harm. I smile and accept that, although not really my first choice for my life, I came from the fires of affliction mentally unscathed. I wish that were the case for others who find pleasure in playing the victim, while lies and cover ups are protections. It's took me a lifetime to get to this point in my life, and I know that I owe it all to my Best Friend, the Anchor for my soul, Jesus.

I received some news today that disturbed my thoughts, because I don't believe in impossible situations.   A friend has been told he is dying, and my first instinct is to fight. I have become so angry at the enemy's attempts to steal life, inflict pain, and make widows. I have been given death sentences more than once, and because of what I know of the power of life and death being in the tongue, I make a stand and petition heaven for a miracle. I have been blessed with so many, and I so long for someone in this world to know what I know and see what I have seen. So once more and always I fight this invisible enemy of fear and dis-ease.

"When a man is at his wit's end, it is not a cowardly thing to

pray; it is the only way he can get in touch with Reality."

Oswald Chambers

"Hear my prayer, O Lord, and give ear unto my cry."

Psalm 39:12

 

Something has happened to me over the last few days. Remember how excited I was to see The Last Supper, Season 5 of The Chosen? Well, something has shifted inside of me, and my focus is no longer on any sort of personal entertainment. I need to write, even if I think it is bad writing, because that is what I was told to do. My focus has to be on the battle, and I need to hunker down and listen intently for Abba's voice. These times are uncertain, and I am seeing a shift. I cannot explain it other than to say a change is coming. I don't want to sound ominous, because I live in inner peace, and although shaken at times, for the most part I have learned to be content and wade my way through the floods. I always loved to swim against the current! I remember when Abba first spoke to me about writing "the story," I'd hear the words of Isaiah 43:1: "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you." At the moment I did not find that very comforting, but I have learned first hand that God is faithful to His word. The fire singes me a bit at times, but I can fan the flames rather easily.

One thing is for certain in my life, "I do nothing of myself; but as my Father hath taught me." John 8:28. The only thing I need to do each day is abide in His presence, listen for His voice, and do what He says do. I don't need to listen to the latest prophecy or teaching; I don't have to hear a prophetic word. I just need Him, and every day, I can find direction and His plan for the day. I've learned to be patient, although I do have my moments when I've had enough, and I have to say something, but I do try to guard my tongue. Remember..."Life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words" (Proverbs 18:21). 

I'll end with another quotation from Oswald Chambers, "We have not the remotest conception of what is done by our prayers, nor have we the right to try and examine and understand it; all we know is that Jesus Christ laid all stress on prayer." 

Day 91 Tribute to a Friend

4/1/2025

Everyone who knows me and reads these daily blogs knows that I love Israel, and I have been on the daily global prayers calls with the International Christian Embassy Jerusalem for 543 days as of today. This has been the honor of my life, standing with others from all over the world who love Israel and are standing as watchmen on the wall, praying for the peace of Jerusalem as we are instructed to do in scripture. I have met many precious people who are panelists from the different branches of ICEJ as well as others who are associated with the Embassy or who have served in Israel at one time. I am one of 500 - 1000 attendees who have participated for all these days, and who carry the prayer needs to others. My blogs and Facebook page have been my platform for relaying updates and prayer requests, and posting the faces of the hostages still being held by Hamas.

It gets very difficult at times, especially as we wait for the release of the hostages. I can only imagine the torment their surviving loved ones feel, especially the waiting, knowing the evil being done to those who are still alive and being held by Hamas. There are days I can hardly think of anything else, or the weight of my own personal torments, family concerns, and other battles I am facing almost get the best of me. But the global prayer call keeps us going and builds us up. I am also encouraged and strengthened by being a part of a weekly prayer call hosted by a couple who used to live in Israel and still are a part of ICEJ and serve as worship leaders. They now live in the Alabama, and they are very active in governmental concerns, especially the stand for the sanctity of human life. They have been in Washington DC this week praying with on site prayer teams at the Supreme Court. I feel honored to be asked to join their small group. It's a mystery to me how that came about. I guess God has a plan and purpose.

Before we begin our prayer calls we always enter His gates with thanksgiving and into His courts with praise. You've heard me speak of my own times of personal worship and the importance of being in the presence of God, listening for His voice and direction. This is a daily necessity. One of the worship leaders, Ken Soltys of Project 7th Trumpet Ministry, has been my absolute favorite worship leader, who can bring us into the presence of God where we can meet with Him and spend time being empowered to stand and fight the good fight of faith. Ken wants to let all believers know that they could experience the Kingdom of Heaven on earth, as it is in Heaven. His music, his wonderful trumpet sounds and shofar blasts ushered us into heaven. His ministry is international, and he has ministered in Israel at the Feast of Tabernacles.

Ken passed away after ministering in a church on Sunday from what we were told. He had been having health issues, and God had miraculously intervened with healing on so many occasions. Sunday Ken wanted to rest before the next service, and they found him later, resting in the arms of his Savior. He is now in heaven rejoicing with the Lord. One member of our group said he probably went right to the trumpet section with the angels. I have never been a fan of trumpet music, but he played beautifully. He was so alive, pleasant, warm smile, always smiling, even on the days with the worst news. His secret was living in the presence of his Lord, listening for His voice, experiencing His love. This morning, before the call, I had asked God to please have Ken be in charge of worship, because I needed a huge surge of anointed worship. Ken always had scriptures, and as he sang, playing his keyboard, it released any anxiety, any hurts, any sadness I felt. The word of God in his songs touched my heart, lifted me up, and the scriptures he shared even confirmed what the Lord had earlier spoken to me. He soothed my tortured soul so many times.

My one regret is not meeting him face to face, getting to truly know this blessed man of God better. And yet, I do feel that I knew him in Christ and will always know and cherish his memory. I know I'll meet him one day, and hopefully, we will truly get acquainted face to face. I have grieved, and am still grieving, this terrible loss I feel. He didn't know me personally, but he was my friend, my brother, and I will sorely miss him and the wonderful times of worship. I know all of ICEJ and anyone who had the blessing of knowing him feels the same. Of course, his music is available on YouTube and for purchase, so I can listen him as often as I want or need.

I won't say goodbye to Ken, I'll just say "See ya later. Enjoy Heaven, my friend!"

Day 90 Show Me Your Face

 

3/31/2025

Each time  I begin to enter my thoughts for this day, so that I can keep my promise to God daily, I get slam dunked from another direction. Sunday night was a wonderful night of worship, and hearing answer to prayers on behalf of the hostages who have been released, listening to their testimonies over these weeks of how some, who were not serving God, came to know that God exists and that He had been with them in the tunnels with Hamas. Even when tortured, they felt God's presence, and while alone in the darkness, the light was present within their souls. One man, who had never prayed, began to bless any crumb of food he was given, and now he leads his family. Another had called himself an atheist began to realize God existed and was with him. He is now studying Torah. Now my prayer continues that they realize that the light of God's Holy Spirit was present, and Holy Spirit can now draw them to belief in Jesus Christ as Messiah. Scripture recounts over and over again that God never leaves us or forsakes us. Romans 8:28 has proven true over and over of how God can take the ugliness and turn it around for good. The verse actually says "God makes all things work together for good for those who love Him, and who are called according to His purpose." His hand is always extended, and He would have none perish, but He wants all to come to eternal life. So we continue to pray and stand firm in the faith. In the beginning of this ordeal I had a vision of the hostages being lead out of the tunnels by the Angel of the Lord. I've seen other visions and had other dreams, but I pray that it will happen soon, and I hold on in faith. They are my family, and I see their faces daily. I won't forget them.

After a wonderful Sunday I turned back on my phone. I felt that I needed to have a quiet day, shutting out the noise, so I could focus on Jesus, and what He was saying to me. I mentioned in yesterday's post that another attack of the enemy came at the end of my day. It continues to carry on today as well. It is not a new attack, but a familiar one from the same person, one who tries to make me feel guilty for separating myself, even for prayer for a few hours. This is not new, and I am certain that unless God divinely intervenes on my behalf, it will continue. I remain brokenhearted at this writing, but I do forgive, as I always will, because this is the work of the enemy who roams around, seeking whom he may devour, and he wants to sift me like wheat and blow me to the wind. I do not say this presumptuously, as God told me this many years ago. I guess I need another reminder about messing in his stuff, but I will continue to stand against evil and speak what God says speak. I don't know if you've noticed it or not, but the entire world is either in a state of chaos, one of apathy, or spiritual blindness, or, like me, trying to stay in God's presence, waiting for the next step. We are intercessors, and we are standing on the wall for Israel and for America and the nations. We are praying for the church to wake up. This is not a battle of flesh and blood, but it is spiritual. I have shared this previously, and I imagine I will again. These are indeed perilous times, but amidst the evil, there are moments of revelation, as with the returned hostages. God is moving in our midst, but that is not a surprise to me or any other child of God who is actively pursuing His Kingdom. Many are praying for revival, but it is happening now, so wake up! God is moving in California, as He is many places. Young people are hungry, and they are responding in droves. If you are not seeing it, then you are not looking, or perhaps you are not awake. Before revival can come there must be an awakening of the church, the body of Christ, then revival will come with reformation and change. Then it will explode into our nations. The generation some call disinterested is waking up, and they will lead the way.

This morning in our global prayer meeting for Israel, the opening worship song was one of my favorites, by Paul Wilbur, an artist whose ministry I support, as it is multi-faceted for others I serve. His family is becoming my family, and we share Shabbat in Your Home on Friday evenings together with other friends and supporters who love Israel and other nations. The name of the song is Show Me Your Face, Lord. Listen to the lyrics:

… Moses stood on a mountain
Waiting for you to pass by
You placed your hand over his face
In your presence he wouldn't die
All Israel saw the glory and it shines down through the age
Now you've called me to boldly seek your face

 

… Show me your face, Lord
Show me your face
And then gird up my legs, I might stand in this holy place
Show me your face, Lord
Your power and your grace
I will make it to the end, if I could just see your face

 

… David knew there was something more
Than the ark of your presence
In a manger messiah was born
Amongst kings and some peasants
And all Israel saw the glory
And it shines down through the age
Now you've called us to boldly seek your face

 

… Show me your face, Lord
Show me your face
And then gird up my legs that I might stand in this holy place

 

… Show me your face, Lord
Your power and your grace
And I will make it to the end if I could just see your face
If we could just see your face
Show me your face, Lord
Show me your face
And then gird up my leg I might stand in this holy place
Show me your face, Lord
Your power and your grace
I will make it to the end if I could just see your face
And I will make it to the end if I could just see your face
I will make it to the end Abba show me your face

 

This is my heart's desire, to behold His face in glory. I have seen His face as He hung upon the cross dying for my sins, and I will never forget that moment. He is my one desire. So if I have to have these trials and tests, if I have to be cleansed by the fires to be purified and made holy, I will endure to the end, because all I want is to see His beautiful face, be in His presence for eternity. God says that all who seek Him will find Him, if you seek Him with your whole heart (Jeremiah 29:13). 

Show me your face, Lord, show me Your face. I will make it to the end if I can just see your face.

Day 89 Seeds of Truth

3/30/202

 Last week was particularly challenging, and I struggled to keep up with some things. Yesterday something happened that upset me, because it seems as if (and I should already expect this) the enemy was listening to conversations, biding his time to attack. So this morning I decided that I would shut myself in with the Lord, cut off the cell phone to avoid the texts and any unpleasant or demanding phone calls. I wanted to focus on Jesus. I  had decided that I would attend church with my Jesus Image family online, since I've been missing it lately. It is a Jesus people church in Orlando, Florida led by Michael and Jessica Koulianos. Yesterday I described what God had spoken to the Jacob Tent family of believers about welcoming in the presence of Holy Spirit and allowing Him to linger, not putting God in a box or limiting what He wants to do by rushing to do the next thing. Jesus Image does that so well, and they teach and train young people, and some older students, how to love Jesus.

They had just returned from a few days in Orange County, California, training and ministering. Today they were commissioning students from Jesus School to go out into communities or other nations and share the love of Christ. The missions teams are going to the Middle East and Germany, and others will be in Phoenix, California, Georgia, and Houston. Each year they do this, and the students are so excited and full of the love of Jesus. The kids were likened to seeds being sown on fertile soil all over the world with revival coming. I would have loved to have had a church like this growing up and for my children. So many things I missed, and they missed, and it is so important for children to know they are made in the image of God, and He has a plan and purpose for their lives. In fact, we all need to be encouraged that we have a place in this world.

There were many who were baptized in the morning service, and Michael always asks them why they want to be baptized. The responses are so heart felt and never rehearsed. There are tears and joy and celebration. The little children are taught early about the love of God in a depth most churches do not feel a young one can understand. They respond that they want to surrender to Jesus and give Him all their love. I was like that, except my training was pretty much on my own, except when I asked questions of teachers and read books. I was so blessed to have school teachers who also attended my church when I was a child and young teenager. I learned so much at the feet of Jesus after I was older. I had an insatiable curiosity, and I still do, except now, it's hunger I feel. I'll be beginning a new study about the Courts of Heaven with a prayer group beginning Tuesday. It is in short bites using a 365 devotional. I wish we could have started in January, but I am excited to walk through it with other intercessors. It's called "April Showers Bring May Flowers" with the Her Voice Movement. I'm not sure what our effort will encounter, but I love learning and growing. We will be studying the book of Daniel, and we will be following his example of prayer and praying multiple times a day. 

Tonight I also attended the evening service at Jesus Image. Prior to Michael teaching in the morning service, he said "It feels like heaven here. Isn't that wonderful?!" I can feel the presence of the Lord even here in my room. Tonight was the same. The worship lifted us to the throne room of God. The speaker was Sister Nechama of the Evangelical Sisterhood of Mary, and she spoke from her heart on how the gift of repentance opens eyes to see the suffering of the Father and Jesus on the cross dying for our sins. She spoke about how God's heart hurts when people do not accept His love and seeing His Son endure the suffering on the cross. It must have broken His heart to see His Son taking the sins of the world onto His shoulders, yet God had to turn away, because He is holy. 

Sister Nechama also shared about the modern day martyrs of our faith mentioning those who recently died in the Congo and a detailed account of some of the hostages released from Hamas torture recently. She shared the testimonies of some who shared that they survived the day to day torment by choosing the path of faith in one way or another. Some had not even been believers in God or even in the synagogue, yet they had divine encounters that helped them endure, so they could come back and tell others. I am so grateful that someone cares so much for my dear family in Israel.

My day was full, and the attack from the enemy came again, but I remain standing strong. I'm not sure why I seem to bother the enemy so much, but I imagine it's better me than someone else. I thank God for the gift of repentance and for His great love. Learn to spend time waiting for Him to speak, to talk friend to Friend. We miss so much when we try to do it alone.

Shalom.

Day 88 The Father is Waiting

 

3/29/2025

 

Many years ago when the Covid plague hit the country, followed by mandates, fear, and ultimate chaos, my thought was "as in the days of Noah." Each time something new happened, and I saw very little response from the church, my thoughts were the same. Each time something else happened, like clockwork I might add, my response, now a lament would be the same. Over the last year and a half, since Israel was so maliciously attacked, and the church seemingly unconcerned, I have sought the Lord on behalf of the church even more. Everyone is so quick to quote 2 Chronicles 7:14, but they do not read with understanding that this means the church, beginning with the individual, intercessor standing in the gap, repenting first for one's own sins, then the sins of the others for whom they stand in identification with the sins, as did Daniel. Moses was an example of a mediator and an intercessor, as was Abraham when he tried to spare Sodom and Gomorrah if ten righteous men were found. Sadly, there were only three, as Lot's wife, turned around and looked back at the city, against the warning of the Angel of the Lord. How many times do we look back?!

The signs of the time are all around us, yet many still do not see. Many times in scripture, God blinded the eyes of the people and stopped their ears from hearing, because He knew the hardness of their hearts.  Jesus even told His disciples that the parables would be explained to them, but others would not understand. God's ways are higher, and we do not always understand. Actually, I am beginning to wonder how many who say they know a thing or two truly understand. Paul said we see in part and understand in part, but when we are face to face with our Savior, then we will understand. Even His disciples did not understand until after His resurrection when He met them in Galilee. But this I know. The word of the Lord is very clear about repentance and forgiveness.

Today, following our worship at Jacob's Tent, the Lord spoke a prophetic word through one of the lady's present in the service. In brief, God was saying to them what I have also prayed about in every church I have attended except one online church. The warning spoken was first to humble themselves and not put God in a box according to their order of service, and not to put a hold on the work of Holy Spirit. I  have written about this before. We have our agendas - worship, singing a few songs, then on to the next thing on the bulletin. While that is not the way it is at Jacob's Tent, as they always try to be sensitive to the move of Holy Spirit, this message was for another purpose. Tears flowed from the eyes of the one speaking this message in obedience to the word of the Lord, her heart yielded. Our shepherd confirmed the word and worship continued, with many on their knees before the Lord, singing and praising. Then they were led into a time of repentance, seeking the Lord for any offenses against the Lord or another that needed to be forgiven before the gifts could be brought to the altar, which is scriptural. It was a beautiful time, and I searched my heart, as I do numerous times daily, because we do not want anything standing between us and the Lord. A sermon was not given, as this time of repentance and asking forgiveness continued. Then our shepherd began to ask forgiveness from others, beginning with someone in the family, who was not present, but who may have been listening online. My heart overflowed with joy. This has been a prayer of mine for a long, long time, and I pray that forgiveness is received and fellowship restored. What a beautiful worship service. This is so needed in the church at large, but I believe that God is moving on hearts. I have a close friend who attends church in North Carolina, whose pastor is sensitive to the move of Holy Spirit, and he says many times the service is spent at the altar, seeking God for answers to prayer and healing. I look forward to visiting this church in the near future.

Revival is happening in certain churches, especially in California, and young people are running to the special events being held, and God is saving young people, delivering older people, healing, restoring, and I believe there is going to be an explosion of love and power spreading across America and the world in greater numbers than the Jesus Revolution in the 70's, as many young people respond to the call of God to evangelize. I am so blessed to be part of evangelism in America and across the globe. If God can use an older donkey like me, He can use anybody. Now is the time to answer the call of God in fulfilling the great commission, the mandate Jesus gave His disciples in Matthew 28:

"Then the eleven disciples went away into Galilee, to the

mountain which Jesus had appointed for them. When they saw Him, 

they worshiped Him; but some doubted. And Jesus came and spoke

to them, saying, 'All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.

Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the

name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them

to observe all things that I have commanded you, and lo, I am with you

always, even to the end of the age.' Amen."

Matthew 28:16-20

Today I read this in my 60 Days of Prayer:

Surrender to Divine Timing

"When faced with delays or challenges, have faith that waiting with patience and humility will lead to renewed strength and growth. Embrace this moment of pause as an opportunity to align your will with His, knowing His timing is perfect and His ways are higher than yours." 

And the prayer:

"Heavenly Father, grant those feeling suspended in uncertainty the strength to trust in Your timing and wisdom."

God has given each of us gifts and callings. We each were born for a purpose, the greatest purpose is fulfilling His will which is to love Him with all  our hearts and our neighbors as ourselves. God longs for relationship with us. The Body of Christ, the Bride of Christ, the church has many members, as an individual has many parts, each one dependent on the others, functioning perfectly as God created us to do. This is how the gifts of the Spirit work together, each member working together. Now is the time to walk in the work He has called and equipped you to do. His hand is extending, and He's waiting for you. 

 

Day 87 Defeating the Darkness

 

3/28/2025 

Your word is a lamp for my feet,

a light on my path.

Psalm 119:105

 

Life is clouded in shadows within the darkness of the soul. Only in the presence of light can there be a shadow. Our hope is found in the light, in the presence of the Light, Jesus. Confusion, doubt, anger, and many mixed emotions can extinguish the light. Thankfully, we have the Word of God to be that lamp unto our feet to light out path.

Today was the initial showing of The Chosen, Season 5, Part 1 of The Lord's Supper. Beginning to end there was a shroud of darkness mingled into happy times as Jesus enters into the temple court area of Jerusalem through the sheep gate. He was riding a donkey, prophesied by Zechariah, so his presence was undeniable. The episode replays parts in the last episode of Season 4 and in the trailers, so I don't think I need a spoiler alert. Most everyone I know really is not as interested in the series as I am. There are so many mixed reviews. There's always a critic in every crowd. But, for me, although there are scenes not described in the Bible, it is a television series meant as entertainment and ministry. I know my Bible pretty well, so I can understand some of the changes for effect; however, the Bible says we see in part and know in part, so who's to say what is not accurate. Also, Dallas takes great pains to consult with a Christian, a Catholic, and a Jewish Rabbi to insure he is within the scope of Bible accuracy. Personally, watching the characters in their very elemental humanity, they give me a credible view of how the disciples lived. Also, Jonathan Roumie's portrayal of Jesus is believable, even when he loses his temper. Jesus as man and God. But, I'll leave it up to the audience to make their own determination. 

After the movie we took a stroll through the mall, so we could stop by the new Christian coffee house, Legacy Coffee+Cream being served by two young Christians men. We had a tour and great conversation with Robert who works there, who will be attending Liberty University when he graduates from high school. He is leading a large group of students in Bible study each week in a large room that is available to rent for events. They also have blackboards for prayer requests to be posted by patrons. It does my heart good to see young people teaching the word to so many others. Robert is only 17 years old! Think what his life will be at Liberty. It is my understanding that the coffee house is run by a local church in Colonial Heights. I wish we had more churches interested in doing this type of ministry in the community. I know that I'll be back to enjoy the coffee and pastries, plus it has adequate tables for kids and older kids to mingle, enjoy their brew, and share the love of Christ.

Sadly, when I got home, I checked my emails for prayer points, and I saw the news of the 7.7 earthquake in Myanmar. The death toll has been mounting, as Israel and nations are sending teams to assist. We prayed this morning for those who are under the rubble, trapped, or dead. I pray that Jesus will manifest Himself as they cry out to Him. It seems as if the birth pangs spoken of in prophecy are getting closer, and it is breaking my heart to hear of tragedy all over the world. I know that many opinions are being fomented against our government, and that is a tragedy in itself. Four years ago at election time, God gave this nation what we deserved, and as a result, lawlessness, hatred, murder, chaos, as well as other degradation occurred. When God is removed from government and even the church, tragedy results. This time, God had mercy on America, because we prayed and called the nation to repentance. I am so grateful to my Abba Father for hearing our cries for mercy and deliverance. Sadly, there are many, including those in the church, whose eyes are blinded from the truth, as Jesus said would happen, so they are joining in with those in opposition who are causing people to panic before anything happens. Also, there are many running to stop anything that will help right the wrongs already done. It is so obvious to me that God has His hand on this nation and on Israel. I pray for the church to awaken.

This morning as I listened to Jack Hibbs short morning prayer time on Facebook, I was so excited to hear that every Saturday afternoon he hosts a men's meeting to teach them spiritual masculinity and how it applies to their lives today. I hope I explained that correctly, but the group is a discipleship meeting for men only to help them learn to be men of God in their homes, businesses, every day life with families and friends and in the community at large. We need this in every church for every age group, because there are men who are seniors in age who obviously never had anyone take them under their wings, so they could pass it along to their sons. Pastor Jack said that these meetings have been going on for four years. My cup runs over!

Ramadan is ending soon, so additional prayer continues for our Muslim friends to come to the knowledge of Christ. The only hope we have is in Jesus Christ, as He is the Author and Finisher of our faith. The needs are many, the harvest is great, and the workers are few. May we continue to work while there is light in this world.

Day 86 My Heart is Steadfast

3/27/2025

 And a highway will be there; it will be called Way of Holiness; 

it will be for those who walk on that Way. The unclean will not journey on it; 

wicked fools will not go about on it.

Isaiah 35:8

 

My heart was bursting with joy as I read the above verse from Isaiah, as it speaks of the future glory of Zion, when the children of Israel are regathered. What a day of rejoicing that will be. It also relates to those who belong to God through faith in Jesus Christ as Messiah, and I do dream of this highway where there is peace and harmony after such a long time of sadness and chaos experienced along the way of my faith journey and daily experiences. I remember David's prayer for safety in Psalm 57 when he was hiding from Saul in the cave of Adullam. David often began his psalms of prayer pleading with or questioning God, then he always praises God for His mercy and grace, reminding Him of His faithfulness. After he laments his situation, as Saul was hounding him at every turn, trying to kill him, David ended the psalm:

My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and

give praise. Awake, my glory! Awake, lute and harp! I will awaken the dawn.

I will praise You, O Lord, among the peoples; I will sing to You among the nations. 

For Your mercy reaches unto the heavens, and Your truth unto the clouds. 

Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; Let Your glory be above all the earth. 

Psalm 57:7-11

  

This psalm reminds me to keep my focus on the Lord, regardless of what is happening in the natural. I was thinking of our President just now when David tells God: "They have prepared a net for my steps; my soul is bowed down; they have dug a pit before me; into the midst of it they themselves have fallen." Selah. This word "selah" means to think about or meditate on what I've just said. Pause. I think this is an appropriate one for our President in light of all the controversy surrounding every step he takes. Again, I must say, God is merciful to us, and we as a people do not deserve it. How long, O Lord, until the eyes of the blind shall see, and the heart of stone is turned to flesh?! That's my daily cry to Abba. No, to the Lord  of Heaven's Armies, Adonai Tseva'ot. When will they see?!

Tomorrow I am going with a couple of friends to the movie theater to see Part One of Season 5 of The Chosen. I am anxious to see what happens next, or rather, how what happens next is portrayed by Dallas Jenkins, producer of the series. Some pastors and other leaders do not like it, as they feel it is not Biblical. If he made a series based on the little written about in the Bible, perhaps, there might not be as much clarity as to how things may have happened. John says that the world could not contain the books if Jesus wrote about His entire life. And we are told more than once that we know in part and see in part. Dallas has worked with a Jewish Rabbi, a Catholic leader, and a Christian Pastor when writing new material. For myself, I feel that he has done a very admirable job, so we pray and ask God what He thinks. That's what I do, and He always answers. I feel that the actor who plays the part of Jesus, Jonathan Roumie, does a believable job. When I consider the personality of Jesus, he seems closest to any other actors. I even asked Jesus what He thought about Jonathan. One day we'll know. 

I had a low spot to my day. We had a visitor stop by unexpectedly. Someone I know, a young person, who has taken the wrong path in life. It saddens me to see what is happening to our world and in homes of professing Christians. The enemy is subtle, and compromise is part of his snare. I had to make some tough decisions in my life, but thankfully I did not compromise the word of God. I've done enough wrong, so I pray repentance prayers daily, as we are so vulnerable to the enemy's tricks. Anyone who thinks otherwise may get surprised, although I hope not. Children need to see consistency and transparency. So glad that our government has decided that's important.

Shabbat Shalom, dear friends.

 

 

 

 

Day 85 Arise and Shine

3/26/2025

Truth is a beautiful thing. God's truth rolling off the tongues of men and women who love the Word of God, and who are eager to share the nuggets of gold found within the pages of the Book of Life. What a joy, what a privilege to call Him LORD. 

Tonight I received an email inviting me to the Wednesday night service at Calvary Chapel Pastored by Jack Hibbs, whose special guest tonight was Charlie Kirk who co-founded Turning Point USA in 2012 with Bill Montgomery. Charlie goes all over America speaking to the young people at high school campuses and colleges, empowering them to seek truth in government based on Biblical principles. This is only a brief description of the ministry in which God has placed this young man, but he is catching the  attention of the young people many say are lost, but in fact, they are hungry for the unfiltered truth, especially the Biblical truth about lifestyles and ideas contrary to God's clear word. His crowds are huge and growing larger, and all he does is tell the uncompromising truth. These kids won't go to church, because they see the duplicity and hear opinions rather than truth, or they hear that God loves them just as they are. Which actually He does, but when we accept Christ as Lord and Savior, we are expected to change and follow His way of living. So much wrong has been spoken, demonstrated, made law, and preached that only confuses the young minds, as well the older ones. Charlie just tells it as it is. 

I admire his bravery, his dedication, and his service first to God and to all who attend his meetings and walk away enlightened and transformed by the renewing of their minds. Pastor Jack said that churches need revival, so they can be awakened. Then the people are awakened and transformed. Pastor Jack spoke of the Jesus Revolution, when Chuck Smith had a church full of young hippies hungry for truth. If you haven't seen the movie, Jesus Revolution, it is about this revival in the 70's that rocked the nation and spread across the world. Pastor Greg Laurie, who was part of this story, always says we need another one, led by the youth desiring truth and life that is found not in things this world has to offer, but it is only found in a relationship with Jesus Christ. An awakening powered by Holy Spirit.

I posted the meeting on my Facebook page, so please click on it or go to Real Life. It's a great discussion, and the house was packed! If I lived in California, I would have been there. I thank God for computers and online streaming! I can hardly wait to share with my group tomorrow night. I have a small group of ladies who listen to Pastor Greg Laurie's Harvest Ministries messages each week, then we discuss them on Thursday evenings. We also have additional resources available that I recommend for more in depth study as well as making friends, discussing the message, and signing up for Bible studies. It's a great addition to the small group meeting. So that's my plug for Pastor Greg!! The Lord hijacked me into hosting this group when Covid broke out, but that's another story, and a good one.

As great as online messages and podcasts and other resources are, nothing takes the place of in person church attendance. God tells us so in scripture not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together. So if you're not attending a church, look for one that teaches the Bible page by page, book by book, line by line. We enter His gates with thanksgiving in our hearts, and into His courts with praise. Worship is a time of surrendering to the power of Holy Spirit drawing us up into the presence of God, and it opens our hearts receive the message spoken in His Word. Discipleship is necessary to further teach, train, and walk beside new believers, children, and even seasoned adults. We are continually growing. Jesus said the church should be a house of prayer. I would love to see more 24/7 prayer ministries, but it is also available online, so don't miss out. I believe, and I learn from scripture that what is happening in the world is important as it relates to all life. Jesus is coming back for His church, His Bride, and we must be ready. Israel is key to all things, because the Jewish people are God's chosen people. And we, who have received God's gift of grace through faith in Jesus have been grafted in to the vine by Jesus, and we also share the covenant with the Jewish people. Please read Romans 11 for greater clarity, as Paul shares this important word. The first church is described in the book of Acts, and this is the way it should be today. I believe, and it was mentioned tonight in the meeting, that if the church rose to its proper place doing what God said it should do, then homelessness and poverty would not exist. 

These are exciting times, and God has chosen each of us to be a part of His Kingdom at this time. Let's be ready for Christ's imminent return, as it could be any time now. Come, Lord Jesus, come.

Day 84 Shepherd Lead Me

3/25/2025

 

On Tuesday mornings I love to join the Kehilat HaCarmel Worship Watch from Mount Carmel in Israel. I look forward to connecting with other intercessors, standing on the wall praying for government leaders in Israel and elsewhere, the safety and welfare of the IDF soldiers and Israel's allies, and the hostages and their families. I feel more connected with Israel here in this little group, as well as with the Embassy calls that follow (ICEJ). As watchmen we do so according to scripture: 

Isaiah 62:6-7

 I have set watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem;
They shall never hold their peace day or night.
You who make mention of the Lord, do not keep silent, 

 And give Him no rest till He establishes
And till He makes Jerusalem a praise in the earth.

 

 

The war is not just in Israel, but the nation is surrounded by countries who are against Israel, but the aggression is in many countries as antisemitism grows in Europe, America and elsewhere. The greater threat comes from public media posting false information, causing the heat to rise, and giving the enemy of our souls great joy seeing the chaos, mayhem, and tragic turmoil hate releases. The enemy uses the weak minded who are so obsessed by his suggestions that they cannot see the blatantly obvious truth staring them in the face. Do people who think they are free, enjoy the enemy manipulating their minds? He makes men slaves to his one cause - to destroy anyone who loves God and serves Him. Pastors and churches are under the spell and have conflicting views of what they can say or do. One is under the opinion that "politics" does not belong in the church, yet if they carefully read their Bibles, they would see the truth of who Jesus Christ is, that the government indeed is upon His shoulders, His business, therefore, our business as His representatives on this earth, the Body of Christ. Even in the book of Acts when Herod told Peter not to mention Jesus' name, Peter did. He said he would not deny his LORD. Obedience to God is more important than following the lambs to the slaughter. All things should be done decently and in order, but how is one to do so if they have no guidance. Romans 10:14-15:

"How then shall they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how shall they believe in Him of whom they have not heard? And how shall they hear without a preacher? And how shall they preach unless they are sent? As it is written:

'How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the gospel of peace,
Who bring glad tidings of good things!'"

Now these scriptures may or may not be relevant to the above point, but as Christians we are either being taught, therefore, learning and growing, or we are still drinking milk. Paul spoke about that in Corinthians. The end point is that the whole counsel of the word is not taught, and we have a generation of young people hungry for the truth. Many older ones have long been undernourished.

Sometimes I think I am too passionate about following Jesus, but how can that be? Are we not supposed to surrender our lives to follow Him? Are we not to be transformed by Him, rather than conform to the world? Can't we have fun at church praising, worshiping, laying hands on the sick, enjoying the fellowship of believers, and lingering in His presence. Imagine a Sunday service where Holy Spirit is so welcomed, and He takes over, and people remain face down, sobbing, repenting, being saved, healed, and delivered. A message is never preached by the pastor, because he's right there on the floor with everyone else! 

I've said it before, but I love to watch the children dancing at Jacob's Tent and repeating the Shema, the scriptures. It is heavenly. And these children are persecuted, because they go to church on Saturday. When I was a kid, as long as I had a ride, I was at church every time the doors were open. Even as an adult I did the same, until things changed once we moved to New Mexico. Even then I attempted to maintain my attendance, but it was never the same. I did muster some excitement teaching children and some hungry ladies once upon a time back then, and I continue to this day. Imagine if our joy of being in the presence of God each time the church doors were open, spilling over into our homes and businesses, and every where we went we got the attention of others. I've been accused of being different, meaning the love of Christ being seen and felt in me and through me, and I praise God for that difference which I owe to Him alone for saving me from my sinful nature and setting me on the solid rock on Whom I stand. My Jesus. My Savior. My Lord. But if we are hiding ourselves, who will see Jesus? Our Shepherd leads us and protects us. We are His flock, and we have to do better. We have to tell others. We have to show others that He lives in us! We must come out from among the world and be a holy people. Starting now.

Day 83 Contemplating Life

 

3/24/2025

 

Getting to know someone, really know them well, is a process, sometimes a life-long pursuit. When I lived in New Mexico I had two really close friends, both married, who took care of this ole spinster whether I needed it or not. We'd get together monthly, meeting at one of our favorite restaurants, and we'd spend almost the entire afternoon eating and chatting. How I miss those days! And the food, especially the food. I used to bug one of them, because she was constantly looking at her cell phone. I'm glad I'm not attached to my phone that much. Not even now. I forget about it, so if someone texts me to see if I'm available for a chat, it may be hours before I see it. Then I feel guilty when I don't receive a text back. I guess they had to move on to something else, or hopefully, someone else, a better friend than I am. I have an active life, so no one wants to bother me, because they don't know my schedule. So, I've told friends who say that to me to just call, and I'll pick up if I can, and if not, I will get back to them as soon as I can. Many times I can't pick up, but I do pay attention to phone calls more so than texts. Those little alerts, ding-ding-dings, are so annoying. I don't like group texts either (several repeated ding-ding-dings!) or group emails. What ever happened to picking up the phone and calling a body. I love my lap top, and I am very computer savvy, but I still like snail mail and phone calls. Better than that, I enjoy in person visits. Remember, I'm ancient, or, as I prefer, "old school!" I even use a pencil and paper!

Today, I've spent the majority of the day washing clothes and bed linens. I also threw in a couple of throw pillows and a pillow blanket. I had intended on vacuuming, but the day got by me, plus I made a homemade chicken and rice soup with green chili! I love green chili, which reminds me that I need to order my annual supply. When I plan my trip to New Mexico in a couple of months I won't be driving, so I won't be able to load up my car with green chili or big sacks of pinto beans. They are the best souvenirs one could purchase. I make due here in Virginia, because I am able to order whatever I need. Only thing is that it is way expensive, so I want to savor every bite. Since my son prefers the excess heat of the jalapenos that I planted and froze, my green chili supply is lasting a bit longer. I hiccup if chili is too hot for me, plus it's not enjoyable as the good burn.

Trying to ensure my blogs read well, I generally wait the next day to launch one, just in case I've a misspelled word, which I blame on spell check, as it has proven to be most unreliable. Also, I have to make sure that I haven't gone too badly off the deep end. I tend to have different ideas, and my focus is on Israel and prayer. I do have plans to go to the movie theater to see Part 1 of The Last Supper, Season 5 of The Chosen. I always book my seats, but normally, there are very few in attendance. I can't figure that one out, as the series has been so good, and it gives me things to think about, ask Jesus about, too. Of course He's right there with me, so my thoughts are heard by Him. I started watching The House of David, but I'm not certain what I think of it yet, except there's a lot of death and some witchcraft scenes that are bizarre. It does add some mysteries to the scriptures. Pastor Greg seems to enjoy it, so I'm giving it a chance. I understand that it's a series, like The Chosen, so they have to take theatrical liberty I suppose. I have always loved movies, but I've not had time for it, and it's not my first choice for what I can do with free time. Like I said, I'm a bit different.

Hopefully, this blog will fly. I'm trying to write, Lord, even if poorly. Enough musing. Shalom.

 

Day 82 Blessed Assurance

3/23/2025

 

I'm having another one of those days, even though the day is well spent and bedtime is close. Or maybe not since I have a tendency to linger in the evenings until I am literally falling over. Then I steel myself and hold tightly onto the rail and wall as I descend the basement stairs for my evening exercise with an episode of Alf as my companion. Daniel has been long in bed, as he loves to roost with the chickens. I've been lounging away the afternoon again, after a scrumptious meal of gluten free pizza and a few sips of Dr. Pepper. It's Sunday evening, and I've missed a few meetings, but I had hoped to spend a little time with my daughter. I had some things I wanted to share, but she had other plans, I guess. 

Since I've been blogging, I've been visiting Pinterest for headers. I haven't taken the time to post on my boards for a few years, except for a couple of times, although I receive regular emails to entice me to log on and play. I do have a good eye, and anyone so inclined, is invited to check out my boards. I've been meaning to check them out myself, as I think someone has put group boards on the site without asking. Is that possible? As long as it's nothing bad, I guess it's okay. I'm not glitzy, so that may not be good, but then, maybe a little "glitz" may be good for me. I have grown accustomed to my ways.

Before group prayer this morning, I found myself curled up in Abba's lap again. I finished the short devotional I was doing with a friend on YouVersion this morning. I had forgotten that it was a short version of John Bevere's book, God, Where Are You? that has captured my interest and made me want to read the book. He's talking about the wilderness experience, and he shares a bit of his early ministry days up to the time God sends him to the nations. His story reminds me somewhat of my call, but his wife was supportive and involved, as a couple should be. For a split second I journeyed back into my past, but I quickly put it aside. It doesn't do a bit of good to think about what could have been. But the closer I get to my birthday, I am reminded of the fact that I am still kind of  "stuck!" I feel strangely that there's yet something left for me to do. Abba does say He's doing something new, or am I only dreaming?!

Music plays a huge part in my in my life, and worship is so important to my daily quiet time. The hymns and songs are within my heart, so I don't really need to turn on the music. I sing in the shower, too, and those songs come from Holy Spirit. Anyone who hears me must wonder what I am saying. Once my neighbor said she heard me singing. She said I sang well, so I asked her what language I was singing - English, Hebrew, Spanish, or otherworldly. I love the latter. I'd rather have His songs than mine. Music is a source of encouragement and supernatural strength, strength I need many days in order to face what may come. Tomorrow's Monday, and I used to paint doll faces with a group of ladies who meet each week to work on dolls for missionaries, Dolls on Mission. I used to love going, and during the week, I'd paint at home. Something happened when we broke for the holidays, and I haven't gone back yet. Each Monday I plan to go, but something inside of me can't force myself to do it. I had been sick off and on with my annual upper respiratory irritation, but it seems to return, and my strength has been zapped. There are other underlying circumstances, I realize, but I cannot seem to put my finger on the cause. Just the effect. So maybe I am in Bevere's version of a wilderness experience.

I'm listening to music as I punch out these words on my keyboard. Spontaneous worship is on by a group called WorshipMob. The song, "I Will Make Room for You." It's one of my favorites, and the jest of it is making God my priority, while moving anything else that may taken His place out of the way. Yep, that's definitely my heart cry. I will make room for Him. Remember, I love to climb up into His lap, and just sit a spell. I'm never too old to be with Him, and it's time I love. I had gotten so used to living alone, talking with Abba out loud and often, that my son thought I was talking to him...or myself. After noticing his puzzled expression, I asked him about it, so I explained. I think he had figured it out, because he grew up seeing me with a headset on dancing around the house, singing when he was growing up. I'm glad some things haven't changed for me.

I took a little breather while I listened to some worship music, before I continued this blog. I also picked up Abide in the Secret Place by Andrew Murray. He was commenting on the fact that we do not understand what a privilege it is to be able to come into the presence of a holy God and linger. The inexpressible power and honor of sharing this relationship with the Almighty God of Heaven and earth. This is the blessing I have, because I have had so much time to bow in His presence or just be in the room with Him, His ear listening to anything I say, whether it makes sense or not. He hears me, and He understands. And this relationship is available to anyone who wants to draw close to Him. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, without friends to share, I have my Abba, my Holy Father, who is only a heart cry away. And yet, not even that far, because Holy Spirit dwells within me.What a blessed assurance of His love and power in my life. It's worth everything, and it's available to all who call on Him with an open heart.

 

Day 81 A New Thing

3/22/2025

 

It seems as if each day God is giving me confirmation about the new thing He is doing in my life or about to do. Abraham believed God for the promise He made to him, but it took 25 years for it to come to fruition; then, Abraham was given a test to see if he'd give his son to God, and Abraham passed the test. There are so many stories about waiting, trudging through the wilderness, thirsting for water. Today began with my a portion of my favorite scripture, Isaiah 43:19: "See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland." This scripture promises a time of refreshing, and the water in the wilderness represents the streams of living water flowing through our dry, wasted carcasses when we pass through the times of spiritual dryness and stagnant waters in our lives. The water of life, Jesus, brings us new beginnings and nourishes our dry and weary bones, rejuvenating our souls.

As always my eyes light up when the music plays. Worship ushers in more of the presence of God as I wait, listen, and breathe a sigh of relief and understanding when He speaks to me. I feel the music He brings, and I sing! Thinking back to yesterday evening, the words, "Spring up, O well, into my soul! Spring up, O well, and make me whole, Spring up, O well, and give to me, that life abundantly." The song begins with: "I've got a river of life flowing out of me. Makes the lame to walk and the blind to see. Opens prison doors, sets the captives free. I've got a river of life flowing out of me." Now how great is that?!

Last night I was privileged to spend some quality time listening and sharing with a dear sister in the Lord, who, like me, has a hard time articulating the words she wants to say. Fortunately, we share so much in common, that without having to say much, we understand each other, and we can pray. I had to ask her forgiveness today, however, because when we get to swapping concerns, some words needed to be said or tears needing to be shed, may not have been. I never want to stop the flow when God has a purpose for all things. After our call ended last night, I asked Abba if I had talked too much. Whereas He did not say I had or that I had not afforded her enough freedom to share, I still felt I should write her a note asking her to forgive me, if in any unintentional way, I had not given her sway. It's important to share, but many times, the best thing is to listen. While I couldn't give a hug over the phone, I hope my love and support were sufficient.

Tonight, my daughter and I shared another movie, called "The Healing Garden." It was about a man who lost his wife to cancer, lost his home due to hospitals bills, and lost his truck for the same reason. He moved into a trailer park where he met many disgruntled people, mostly older ones whose lives were hither and yon. The man enlisted the assistance of a little girl in the neighborhood in planting a healing garden, in the tradition of his deceased wife. The story is one of healing, and I recommend it to all.

At that I end this edition, my timeless story, or so it goes. Rest well, share the hope within in you, and give God the glory due His Name. Shalom.

Day 80 Does It Matter

 

3/21/2025

 

It's Friday evening, and my Shabbat began with Shabbat in Your Home, the weekly worship and sharing time I spend, along with a host of others, with Paul Wilbur and his family on Friday evenings as a jump-start to our Sabbath rest. It's a special time of communion and fellowship, and anyone can drop in at 6 pm ET every Friday on YouTube, so consider yourself invited. This week we had a special guest from the Zimbabwe reporting on drilling water wells for the Lemba Tribe, a Messianic Jewish tribe. Imagine having to look for water daily for all the purposes water is used. They also have animals to water, and it doesn't rain much at this time of year. Over the last two years 20 new wells have been dug, and the entire community where each well is dug benefits. The wells are dug near schools, so the children can spend the time in school, rather than having to walk miles to locate a source of water. Even then, the water is not fit to drink. This is one of the life-saving ministries this family and their supporters helps.

The Torah portion this week is in Exodus 35:1 - 38:20, and Moses is going over the commands that God has given which includes keeping the Sabbath day holy. I googled how many times in the Bible God said this command, and the result was 172 times in the Old Testament, so I think we need to sit up and listen. As a Christian, I still attend services in person on Sunday, plus I have been keeping the Sabbath on Saturday for quite a while. As I've mentioned before, I was raised during the time when Blue Laws were in existence, where businesses were closed on Sunday. So I learned to honor the day. My family also used to attend church services, and my mama made it a point to be there every time the doors were open. 

Saturdays have always been times when I enjoyed staying home and just watching movies, visiting friends and family, or relaxing, especially when I worked so hard at my job. I used to tell my boss that I did not work on the weekend, if they wanted a special project completed. They seemed to understand, so they found someone else, or they allowed me to adjust my weekly schedule. My work ethics were always set high, so my work was always completed. At least that is one thing I can feel good about, and I owe that to my Christian upbringing. The scripture says to do everything as unto the Lord. I remember there were many times that I cried out to the Lord about how I evaluated the need of a Medicaid client requesting services. I wanted to make sure that everything was done decently and unto the Lord. Do your job as unto the Lord, and He will honor your work. Additionally, Proverbs 16:7 says: "When a man's ways please the Lord, He makes even his enemies be at peace with him."  

Yesterday I shared that my daughter had provided valuable insight that helped with some feelings I have been experiencing. My devotional also helped, once I went back and re-read it and let it soak in. It was entitled "The Blessing of Opportunity," and it spoke of trusting God, even in the valley, and embracing a spirit of gratitude in all things and in all ways. I always try to look for the good things rather than the bad, keep a positive attitude rather than a sulkly one, as I have much more to be grateful to God for than most. He's had His faithful hand on my life since I was born, and I am certain that He had His hand on me way before that. My mama reminded that my birth was very hard on her, and she almost lost her life. I had the cord wrapped around my neck, so I imagine that didn't help her very much. Days were different in the cave man era, I keep telling myself. But I was blessed even then, although I was a sickly kid with immune system problems. Still here I am today, alive and kickin,' and I have God to thank and praise for my life. I just hope that I'll be able to share with others along the way. Life can be an amazing journey with our Lord the King. Many times I've wondered if my life really matters, and if I am making my parents proud. But my main desire is to bring glory and honor to my Father. This is what really matters, and this is why I live.

Day 79 As Little Children

3/20/2025 

 

The phone rang early this morning as I was tidying up for the day. Normally I don't answer the phone until I finish my morning quiet time. I was preparing to take my shower, and I was listening to Leviticus on my phone app, so I picked up. I am participating in a read through the Bible plan on YouVersion with a friend. I have already struggled through the book of Leviticus in my own personal reading, so hearing the rules and guidance for sinful things a second time, well, it is not something I rush to hear...again! Each year as I breeze through certain chapters, I have to ask Abba to forgive me, as I realize every word is important, but it is hard to hear or imagine that there is nothing new under the sun in the area of sinful living.

The phone call was from my daughter who wanted to share a short devotional with me, before I started my day. She has her own way of presenting things, and it brings a chuckle to my heart each time. She has inherited a few of my idiosyncrasies and creative antics. But if it helps, then I'm all for it. She was exhorting me about not taking care of myself by giving too much of my time to others. I do have a tendency to take on more that I can chew, but then, she is just as bad, if not worse. I grew up with mama quoting the saying "Children live what they learn,"  so at least my daughter learned to love Jesus and the Word of God and to help others. There's another saying in the word, "freely given, freely give." She's followed that path as well.

She was concerned about me, because I had a hard time yesterday sorting through some thoughts. I had gotten so wiped out from trying to comfort others, that it muddled my thoughts, making it difficult to express what I was thinking. It really wasn't a foggy brain sort of thing, just words and thoughts and the inability to express myself. As she prayed for me, she compared the act of walking with others, encouraging them spiritually, as a hike in the woods that becomes tiring, especially if one is not physically in the best shape to take on more difficult terrain. She prayed that I would carry two canteens of water with me, so I would not exhaust my own supply, but I would have sufficient living water for the other person. What a lovely way to say it. Today was a better day, and my quiet time and prayer call picked me up. I was able to climb into Abba's lap and stay awhile, at least until I sorted things out.

Our prayer call this morning was a real boost spiritually, because our CEO and his wife were on the call. Jurgen's wife, Vesna, sings so beautifully, and she speaks and sings with a sweet, comforting voice. I can't remember if she spoke or sang the words, but as she began to sing she said, "You take us into Your lap, Abba." I am so happy that she experiences God's presence, as I do. It's like a little child relaxing in their Abba's lap, finding strength for the day. So that was the start of a better day for me.

The song, "Come Lord Jesus, Come" was playing softly in the background as I began to read my devotional. I had picked up Abide in the Secret Place, by Andrew Murray to the chapter on "The Knowledge of God." Murray says this knowledge is eternal life. experiential knowledge. "Just as the rays of the sun on a cold winter's day warm the body, imparting its heat to us, so the living God sheds the lifegiving rays of His holiness and love into the heart of one who waits on Him." He goes on to explain how seldom we learn to draw near to God, because we have not been taught to develop the practice of waiting before God in silence, so that He can reveal Himself to us. I have noticed that it is the same with worship services, as three to five songs are sung to invite His presence, but once sung, the service goes to the next phase without truly waiting in His presence. Learning to remain silent before Him opens the way to hear His voice:

"Just as the sun rising each morning is the pledge of light throughout the day, so the quiet time of waiting upon God, yielding ourselves for Him to shine on us, will be the pledge of His presence and His power abiding with us all day long. Be sure that the Sun has risen upon your soul." 

Perhaps this is why God tells us to come as little children, who love to climb up in their daddy's lap, or like Mary of Bethany, learn to sit at Jesus' feet as He is teaching. For me ushering in His presence requires very little effort. Once I open the word, or turn on the worship music that truly acknowledges His holiness, His mercy, grace and welcomes His presence, my soul is at rest, and I can function in peace and clarity. How I wish that all would come to know that God is with us daily, not just a Name to call upon Sunday mornings. When He said He would send the Comforter, in the person of Holy Spirit, who would never leave us, He meant it. Now if man would only awaken to the truth and walk in His light and power. Imagine the change in our lives and the world.

Day 78 No Retreat

 

3/19/2025

 

Another good nights sleep, but once again, I woke up with a type of fog hanging over me, stronger than yesterday, but deeper. This morning the news from Israel was devastating, but nothing I did not know was eventually going to happen. Jesus said as much in John 16:33 when He said: "These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."  In Matthew 24:3-14 He tells his disciples the signs of the times and the end of the age. In verse 8, He calls the signs, "birth pangs," and rightly so. I imagine my feelings this morning when I woke up were meant to discourage me, or to prepare me, depending on who's view, for what was to come once I turned on the computer for the daily brief. At least I realize where it comes from, and I can look to the Lord for my strength. It seems as if the birth pangs are getting closer, lasting longer, but there's something no quite right. So we wait, but we do not fear.

As I waited for the call, I began to remember people who impacted my life, family who struggled but who overcame great trials and some who muddled through. My sister and I are trying to get all our cousins together, because we're getting tired of seeing everyone at funerals. When we were growing up, we spent time together, and it forever knit us into a strong family. I want them to remember. Over the years, things change. We grow up, and some of us move away. I was gone for 35 years, and honestly I feel like a stranger being back here. As much as I love New Mexico, my mountains and aspens, and the snow, all my friends, moving home was necessary, and it may have saved my son's life. But it hasn't been easy, and I miss my friends. Two of my close friends and I used to go out regularly to eat. Each year we would go to the chili cook off  to benefit the soup kitchen. Since I left my friends don't see each other much. I feel responsible, as if I was the glue that held things together. Maybe, but so much has happened, and sadly things change. I don't like change.

I've always motivated people, helped them find ways to get things done, ideas for activities in the church and in the community. I used to have the gift of seeing potential in everything. But now, finding anyone who wants to put forth the effort is hard, and that's a shame. We're missing out on so much. I'm always trying to get people to dare to dream, and to dream big. I don't believe of giving up or in. But, truthfully, I've lost a little steam to keep this old engine going. I'm having problems chugging up the mountain, because the valley is dragging me back down into the desert. The sand is hot, and my feet are burning. The heat of the sun bearing down on my head causes a dizzying effect, and I become tired, and I want to quit. Why bother to try to go on. I can't depend on anyone. No one follows through, some never put forth the initial effort. But regardless of the "I don't want to" that wells up inside me, there is the other side that fights and refuses to give up. I'm not a quitter, and I don't want anyone else to give up either. 

I was listening to a favorite song this morning during my quiet time called The Narrow Way by Steffany Gretzinger. The lyrics are:

"Lead me, Lord, lead me
Keep me, oh, keep me
From wandering

 

Help me, Lord, help me
Teach me, oh, teach me
Your suffering

 

I will walk the narrow way
The only road that will lead to life
And I will stay the narrow way 

To see the face of the One I love

 

Lead me, Lord, lead me
Keep me, oh, keep me
From wandering

 

Help me, Lord, help me
Teach me, oh, teach me
Your suffering

 

And I will walk the narrow way
The only road that will lead to life
And I will stay the narrow way
To see the face of the One I love
The One I love

 

There is nothing in this life
Worth the cost of losing You
Is it even sacrifice if I trade the world for You?
You're the treasure, You're the Prize
Jesus, only You
Only You

 

There is nothing in this life
Worth the cost of losing You
Is it even sacrifice If I trade the world for You?
You're the Treasure, You're the Prize
Jesus, only You

 

So, I will walk the narrow way
The only road that will lead to life
And I will stay the narrow way
To see the face of the One I love
Yes, I will walk the narrow way
The only road that will lead to life
And I will stay the narrow way
To see the face of the One I love

 

The One I love
The One I love"

This song speaks my heart. I don't want to wander, because I am serious about this season of my life. I know God has His plan for my life. I'm just trying to catch up. Sometimes my friends and family have not understood my life, my choices. They know I love Jesus, and so do they, but they don't understand my obsession. It's always been there, never understood, but there is a small group of people, like Steffany who gets it. "There is nothing in this life worth the cost of losing You." So, I'll wait, and I'll take the days as they come, and I will walk the narrow way, the way that leads to life, and I won't be concerned with what I can't get done, I'll do what I can. Grateful for the chance.