Day 157 Do You Feel Less?

 

6/6/2026

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 

'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, 

plans to give you hope and a future.'"

Jeremiah 29:11

 

High school reunions tend to throw some people into tailspins. Many people become excited about seeing old friends, particularly if the class was smaller, as country schools back in the day generally were. Everyone knew everyone, because the class was so small. My graduating class in 1968 was only 130 students, as I recall, but now that I think about it, there were "clicks," and we even had competing sororities. I was in one of the two most popular sororities in school, but it was based more on popularity than intelligence and personal achievement. Such things, especially in small country schools, could make those who were not "chosen" to feel like social outcasts, not "good enough" or "less than" others. So, those who were not invited to join the "elect" groups finally started their own sororities. I always thought certain prejudices were wrong even back in the day, because as the saying goes, "What would Jesus do?" This is the question in the book In His Steps by Charles Sheldon, that affected my life as a youngster, and it has remained so my entire life.

Yesterday I connected with an old friend from years prior to moving to New Mexico in 1987. I picked up one of my old journals to help me remember those days, and I saw name after name of people I can't remember. People who were obviously close to our family, but for some reason there are people and times that my memory has blocked out. Naturally when old friends get together after a period of time they share their lives. Truthfully, I hesitate to share my life at times, because I have done so many things, but it is only because of God's hand on my life. My experiences were not easily achieved, and going back in time brings up regrets and sadness. I am beginning to realize more and more how little I am really known, as if my life was not important, but every life is important, and sharing our lives, our stories, should bring us closer. However, often this is not the case.  

In one episode of Highway to Heaven Jonathan and Mark are attending Mark's 35th high school reunion. Mark is ecstatic about seeing some of the old friends, remembering "glory days" as a football player. Athletes are always popular in schools at any level. As it turns out Jonathan's assignment from God was to attend Mark's reunion. Since there were some people who as yet had not responded to the invitation, part of the assignment was for Jonathan and Mark to seek out these people to encourage them to attend the reunion. So, the story line revolved around a few class friends who were reticent about attending for one reason or another. They were successful in getting those classmates to attend, but as people began to "mingle" and share their lives, they began to feel a sense of loss, of not measuring up to another's achievements, comparing themselves with others who seem to have achieved more success in their lives. To make matters worse there is always a class "gossip" who makes it her job to inform everyone else of the hardships or juicy news of others, without really sharing her own life story, or if so, relate the truth. It's as if jealousies that began back in teenage years are never resolved, so keeping up with the "dirt" in others' lives becomes a vocation for such individuals. And, it seems as if that was happening in Mark's high school reunion. In the end things worked themselves out, and thanks to Mark's intervention, the tempo picked up with the last dance. But this left Mark to wondering why do people go to such extremes to make things appear other than what they truly were or are? There's the former prom queen who is now aged, whose husband left her for a younger woman; the prom king who became an actor, once adored, but whose fame has faded, balding without his toupee, and mostly unknown by the younger generation; and the man who has become very successful and speaks humbly of his life, yet when asked about family becomes despondent, because his wife "left him." I'm not sure whether she died or ran away, but his response was one of extreme brokenness, which went unobserved by the couple asking the question. But, in each of these three lives, they were successful, and we all become older, and many lose their hair.

Mark shared with Jonathan that even he was making his football glory days into more than they actually were. When my friend and I were sharing about our children, I realized later that I hadn't shared some things, many things. I seemed to dwell on the spiritual, because truly that is what is more important. In listening to her speak of her children and grandchildren I became a bit sad, because I don't see my grandchildren. My younger son has been married twice to older women who already had children, and I adopt complete strangers as my children, so these kids were welcomed and loved. Not being able to know my great-grandchildren is the worst! But they are bathed in prayer daily, 

I've had to give up a great many dreams, one of them, Youth With a Mission (YWAM) about which I have written. I attended meetings way back then, but I was married, and he was not yet a Christian so there was no way he'd be a missionary. As it turned out when he did get saved he earned his own money to take two missionary trips to the Dominican Republic to build churches, and he helped his brother in Christ earn money so he could go with my husband. Those days were priceless. Now I have only shadows of memories, but God has blessed me with many more. I was thinking about most American teenagers who go on mission trips in the summer really don't feel the call as a gift. "One experience cannot compare to a lifetime of service." Those are my words, and they are true.  

To be continued...! 

Day 156 Comfort Zones

 

6/5/2026

“I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, 

he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” 

John 15:5 

 

I read today that the fear of life or living is the favorite disease of the twentieth century, and I can believe that, because I've seen the signs even in my own family. As a case manager I was responsible for evaluating the medical and mental health needs of Medicaid patients in order to determine eligibility for home health care services and other resources. So many individuals were on multiple medications prescribed for certain conditions which alarmed me, but then I was not a medical physician, although I do have a medical background. When I developed plans of care I always considered ways to encourage patients to think of what they would love to do with their lives, future goals, hopes and dreams. Having a history of chronic pain, illnesses and immune deficiency disorders all my life, I could understand on some level the pain and discomfort many suffered, but I never considered disability assistance. I persevered and found ways to cope with my pain. But, as a case manager I recognized the fear to hope for a life in the eyes of certain patients, because there had been years of dependency on Medicaid support, and the thought of losing financial and medical support can be very frightening. To even consider working a job or feeling capable of attaining freedom in a profession seemed unattainable due to their limitations. I know this to be true, because I have family members who receive disability assistance. It often seems like an uphill battle, but I believe in what Jesus can do, because He did it for me. We serve a God who heals, and in Him, we have hope. People are afraid to move outside of their comfort zones, especially dependence on systems, but this is true of life in general, because we do not trust the Author and Finisher of our faith, and quite honestly, this hope is not offered to many who need the encouragement.

Next week the International Christian Embassy Jerusalem of which I am connected will be hosting an Emergency Jerusalem Summit to consider the alarming rise in antisemitism since the October 7, 2023 massacre in Israel. It will also confront the false teaching of Replacement Theology and the new Pauline Perspective that teaches that the church has replaced the Jews and that Israel no longer has a part in the end time plan of redemption. I've written and spoken about this error in doctrine previously, so I am very anxious this summit will be taking place in Jerusalem. I must admit that the scriptures, particularly Paul's account in his epistle of Romans clearly puts things in the proper perspective, but again misinterpretation of information previously prophesied by the prophets has not been taken into account, especially in Chapter 11 which speaks of the Gentiles being grafted into the vine as wild olive shoots. Apart from the root, which in this case is the Hebraic roots established from the covenant with Abraham, the branches do not function. Jesus said "Apart from Me you can do nothing."Again, comfort zones will be shaken up, but the truth of the Word of God begins in Genesis and ends in Revelation, and no one can change the plans of God. As Psalm 119:89 says "Forever, O Lord, Your word is settled in heaven." I pray hearts will be open, and Holy Spirit will guide all in attendance to the truth. We are living in incredible times as prophecy is being played out right before our eyes. 

Our mandate in Isaiah 62:1-7 is clear as intercessors:

"For Zion’s sake I will not hold My peace,
And for Jerusalem’s sake I will not rest,
Until her righteousness goes forth as brightness,
And her salvation as a lamp that burns.
The Gentiles shall see your righteousness,
And all kings your glory.
You shall be called by a new name,
Which the mouth of the Lord will name.
You shall also be a crown of glory
In the hand of the Lord,
And a royal diadem
In the hand of your God.
You shall no longer be termed Forsaken,
Nor shall your land any more be termed Desolate;
But you shall be called Hephzibah, and your land Beulah;
For the Lord delights in you,
And your land shall be married.
⁵ For as a young man marries a virgin,
So shall your sons marry you;
And as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,
So shall your God rejoice over you.

⁶ I have set watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem;
They shall never hold their peace day or night.
You who make mention of the Lord, do not keep silent,
⁷ And give Him no rest till He establishes
And till He makes Jerusalem a praise in the earth."

There are many "comfort zones" in our personal lives, in our nation, and in our world. This is the year we celebrate our 250th Day of Freedom. I pray it will be a year of realizing what freedom we as a people do have and truly embrace it. We must fight hard to keep it, and it will begin by our returning to the God of our salvation. Hearts of gratitude for what our Founding Fathers did, but understanding that their faith in God made it possible. Breaking free from what brings us comfort or control, and truly looking to God to rescue us once again from a nation that is standing on sinking sand. May we stand on the Rock of Christ our Savior. 

Even so, come Lord Jesus, come!

Day 155 Taste & See

 

6/4/2026

 "How sweet Your words to me; they are sweeter than honey." 

Psalm 119:103

 

Called as a child to follow Christ, following a crazy path, contrary to my desires, but deviating from the straight path, the narrow road, I often wonder if I have had any impact for the cause of Christ on another person. Sometimes when I'm sorting through files and old letters from friends, I will happen upon a note or card written to me or about me, that I may or may not remember about my job performance or something I did or said that has made a difference. I imagine I have become so accustomed to the rabbit hole of guilt and shame that I still seem to wander close to the edge when I remember. Words cut deeply, and the wounds take time to heal. I am grateful they do not fester from unforgiveness or bitterness. I imagine I have grown accustomed to unkind remarks about my decision to surrender my life to Christ. I've never been selfish, it's just who I am called to be, and the walk I have chosen to take. 

The Psalms are very soothing at these times, as I find a kindred spirit in David when he is crying out to God, alone and betrayed. But it is in these moments that the time with the Lord can be so sweet. I'm beginning to not mind so much - being misunderstood or caring too much. I'm in good company, because look at Jesus' life! He told the disciples they would be hated, and His prayer in John 17 included me. I'd rather be suffering for the cause of Christ than sitting on a fence with my legs dangling on both sides of the fence and be considered lukewarm.

The mini-dreams or visions are becoming more frequent, and today I dreamed of being in an airport. Whether alone or straggling behind I am not certain, but I was assisted by a friendly younger man who helped me along the path to make my flight connection. It seems as if he had many questions as we walked, then he'd go about his business. But as I was hurrying down another direction, all of a sudden he was back, helping me again, asking more questions about my trip. This happened off and on until my final leg of this cross-country hike to make a connection. It had to be a flight from Dallas, as I've been somewhere like it before. It seemed familiar somehow. The last time he walked with me he asked about my brother. That's when I arrived at my destination and could safely leave him. I remember wondering how he knew I had a brother. I don't understand it, and perhaps I never will, so it's written down, and I'll try to leave it for now. I'm not sure when, but I drifted asleep again, and awoke suddenly to the words, "If he does anything to harm you!" that came from the mouth of an angry woman in the crowd, although I really don't remember much about it. I guess I'll keep my eyes open and stay out of airports!

Tonight I met with my group I host for Harvest Ministries. We were talking about being prepared for heaven and what Jesus said about packing light for the trip. He warns us to stay alert, as no one knows when He may appear, only the Father. We also spoke about gratitude. Sadly, we as followers of Christ do not always have or show gratitude, and we have much to thank Jesus for. There's one young lady in the group who is learning to memorize scripture, so it is a joy for me to hear her enthusiasm. I am forever harping on the importance of memorization. It's a habit I learned as a child, and I still remember many of my favorite passages from early years, and from many years of reading and studying. I love looking at the context of scripture, so often we go over many passages. I love that the ladies are excited about the study, and it especially touches my heart when someone can quote the verses from memory. That reminds me of a scripture that I have used before in my blogs, "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." 3 John 4. Although the ladies are not my children, being the oldest in the group, I do tend to call him "kids." But it is a wonderful joy to see them "taste and see that the Lord is good!"

Day 154 At What Cost?!

 

6/3/2026

"No, but I will surely buy it from you for a price; 

nor will I offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God 

with that which costs me nothing."

2 Samuel 24:24  

 

An interesting thing happened to me today! Well, it seems as if interesting things are becoming more common, as my life becomes more complicated, yet much freer spiritually speaking. Each morning I turn on my music on YouTube, but this morning the normal appearance of the page on my phone consisted of "shorts" rather than videos. And the "shorts" were not ones I would even look at, because I don't have the time nor the inclination to scroll. I had to search for my music, and when it posted on the page, it still had "shorts" as part of the menu. Also, my search engine on the phone, which is Google, had erased my searches and only showed the usual daily happenings that Google reports. Even my search engine on my laptop, Firefox, was behaving unnaturally. I felt as if I was in an AI Twilight Zone, and maybe I was getting a foreshadowing of what is to come.

So, music aside, I decided to just talk to God before I began my Bible study. I talk to Him all the time, but I had much more on my mind, and I did want to ask Him why this was happening. It didn't take me long, as I am very much aware of the extreme tactics the enemy takes to distract, but he needs to consider what will catch my eye, rather than sticking just anyone on my page. As much as I love Dan Bongino, his rants were a bit much for me this morning.

Lately, with all the craziness around me I have felt a great desire to get away. Even on the global prayer call, we've been counseled to get away and rest. I guess I just don't feel that missing out on the daily content and prayers warrants a time away, and I'm only listening in as an attendee, which I love being in the background. I did begin to think a bit about time away. When I was growing up here in Virginia there were a couple of places I loved to go, but I was always with someone. In New Mexico I could get alone and hide, escape from the phone and computer, but it's not so easily done here. I began to ask Abba one more time, until the next, "Where can I go? I belong no where, Lord! Where is my somewhere?!"

I'm sure God rolls His eyes when I say those things, but God's not like that, and He really does care about everything that concerns us. Sometime we burn out and need to actually disconnect and rest! It doesn't mean I can't or won't pray, rather I'd escape the hundreds of emails that come my way. Just now as I am writing those words, I felt such joy burst forth from me, and I began to sing "Forever He will be...the Lamb upon the throne. I gladly bow my knee...and worship Him alone." These are lyrics from All Heaven Declares by Noel Richards. The song reminds me that God fills our hearts with peace, even when war is all around us. Even Jesus had to get off by Himself to pray, and I often think, that is precisely what I need in order to decompress and hear His voice.

My reading for today takes me back to Psalms 119:73-96. The Psalmist begins with: "Thy hands have made me and fashioned me; give me understanding, that I may learn thy commandments." It reminds me of Psalm 139 where David tells God that He has made us fearfully and wonderfully. So how can man question their Maker? Considering the make up of the human body is unquestionable proof that we were not a cosmic accident or mishap in space. No, we are God's creative masterpiece here to do His will. And that makes me so happy.

In planning the Emergency Jerusalem Summit that will be in Jerusalem next week, the ICEJ has been consulting with many pastors and ministries about attending the event. Today in the prayer call we were told that a Catholic priest had approached a member of the team about urging many to come together and work together, forgetting differences in theology. He said, "Whatever we call ourselves we need to work together." Of course he was talking about denominations and religious beliefs, so his point is well taken. The church does need to work together to combat the problems of our day, especially antisemitism. But the cost is dear, as aligning ourselves with the nation of Israel makes us a target. How did it get to this?! I have not been able to rally support for Israel, not even when there were still hostages involved. It saddens me how people tend to forget what is not right in front of them, and since the big news stations do not support conservative views, Israel being one, the coverage declines, and people forget. And when the fire gets too hot, they bow out. It's a good example of the Parable of the Sower and the Seeds. People tend to take the easy away around, but the Road Less Traveled is ignored. 

It made me think that we want something that costs us nothing. And we can use any excuse possible to justify ourselves. When King David took the illegal census of the nation, the people payed the price of his sin. God gave him three choices for punishment, and he chose to be under the hand of God rather than others. So the Lord sent a plague on the nation for three days:

"Then David spoke to the LORD when he saw the angel who was striking the people, and said, 'Surely I have sinned, and I have done wickedly; but these sheep, what have they done? Let Your hand I pray, be against me and against my father's house.' And Gad came that day to David and said to him, 'Go up, erect an altar to the LORD on the threshing floor of Araunah the Jebusite.' So David, according to the word of Gad, went up as the LORD commanded." (2 Samuel 24:17-19). 

When David approached Araunah who owned the threshing floor and told him that he wanted to purchase the place, Araunah offered for him to take it. "Then the king said to Araunah, 'No, but I will surely buy it from you at a price; nor will I offer burnt offerings to the LORD my God with that which costs me nothing." (2 Samuel 24:24). David knew the sin was his, and that the payment had to be paid by him. There is always a cost for disobedience, as there will always be consequences of surrendering our lives to Christ, but in the end He is victor! And the victory is ours! Hallelujah!!

Day 153 Ein Kamocha Adonai

 

6/2/2026

"Lord, there is no one like you! For You are great,

and Your name is full of power."

Jeremiah 10:6

 

Yesterday I shared visions I had during prayer, visions of women in distress, crying, lost, even to the point of not being consolable. One woman held in the strong arms of someone I believe was the Lord, grieving. Before I moved back to Virginia I had a dream about seeing people lining the road on both sides, desperate, lost, seemingly hopeless. I did not walk alone as I watched these crowds, walking single file slowly down the road, as if having no where to go, no one to turn to, heads bowed. I had the Captain of the Armies of Heaven by my side, although at the time I did not realize it. This morning in the prayer watch from the Messianic church in Israel, I heard about the weariness of the people, particularly the soldiers who are physically tired, some having been on active duty the entire time since 10/7/2023. Many deployed from other countries, including the United States, where they have made a life, having to leave spouses and children behind. War is not something new for Israel, but this war has gone on for too long. It's hard enough leaving your family behind, but hearing of the increasing hatred and antisemitism all over is very troubling when that person is elsewhere. These are indeed perilous times.

We turn to the Psalms for strength and comfort, but we also sing, praise, and worship our God. There is no one like the LORD - "Ein Kamocha Adonai." And He is worthy of praise. He is watching over Israel, although some would think that not so. Regardless of what appears to be, God is calling His people back to the land, and the land is prospering in spite of war, homes destroyed, lives changed from the savage loss of lives, senseless slaughter of innocents, against the lies and accusations printed daily. No one cares to know the truth of these special people. People who do not want war, but who have extended warm welcomes and outstretched arms to the ones who attacked them that early morning so long ago. 

I know what it's like to suffer when people turn against, accuse, deny, listen to lies and utter nonsense. But I made a promise to God when I surrendered my life to Him so many years ago, and I will stand with Israel, although I lose some people along the way, including family. It's happened before when I made a decision to leave a job due to prejudice on the part of my employer, and when I refused to attend a family event at a facility that treated others unfairly because of skin color and nationality. Veterans. Those who defend our nation and maintain our safety and security. It was long ago, but nothing really changes, as we see in America now. 

Each Tuesday morning I enter into worship and prayer with the Kehilat HaCarmel Worship Watch in Israel, and my heart is always warmed by the worship led by Karen Davis. She has an anointed ministry, and the songs are so beautiful and scriptural. Karen has been very ill for several weeks now, but she has returned, and she is lifting her voice in praise to her God, Adonai. Listen to the words of her song:

"I have set the Lord before my eyes, so my heart will not be shaken. I have set my will to seek His life. I will wait upon the Lord. I will lift my eyes until the hills to the God of all creation. I will lift my heart and worship Him, I will glory in the Lord. I will praise the Lord, I will praise the Lord. I will lift my eyes to the Lord most high. I will praise the Lord."

Another one that is equally beautiful: 

"I love the Lord for He has heard my voice. He's heard and answered me. He's lifted me above the flood, above my enemies. The pain of death surrounded me. I called upon His Name. He sent His word, delivered me, gracious is the Lord. So return to your rest, so return, o my soul. He has torn, but He will heal, He will come, He will restore. So taste and see that the Lord is good, His mercy endures forever."

As she sang she prayed for others who are having physical challenges. It seems as if many in the congregation have been hit with illness or other challenges, and as I listen and observe, I have noticed that many standing on the wall with Israel, myself included, have been encountering tremendous obstacles in their lives. Yet, yet, God is faithful, as we are faithful to praise His Name. Regardless of what happens, no matter what the enemy throws in our face, trying to weaken and destroy our health, and our faith, and steal our joy, it does not happen. We are victorious in battle, and this is a spiritual battle. One of our scriptures today is found in Psalm 61:1-8. It was written by David in a time of great distress:

"Hear my cry O God; attend to my prayer. From the end of the earth I will cry to You, when my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Bor You have been a shelter for me, a strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. Selah. For You, O God, have heard my vows; You have given me the heritage of those who fear Your name. You will prolong the king's life, his years as many generations. He shall abide before God forever. Oh, prepare mercy and truth, which may preserve him! So i will sing praise to Your name forever, that I may daily perform my vows." 

O, Lord, you are worthy of our praise! There is no one like You. 

Day 152 If I Should Die....

 

6/1/2026

 "If I should die before I wake, I pray Thee, Lord, 

my soul to take."

Running, running, running, always running to catch up to some "to do" item! My head is swimming from all the incessant activity of the day, and it has only begun! After a nice, relaxing two Sabbath day rest weekend, I should be easing out of the starting gate, not at full gallop! I think I have something else God needs to teach me.

For me living my life is a continual refresher course, but that's good, because I love re-runs! Reading through the Bible each year has taught me how little I know, but then daily learning and seeing scripture come alive is what the life hidden in Christ is all about. I just finished reading the book of Job, and today I began reading the Psalms. Actually, I live in the Psalms, as I read them daily. There's so much transparency and true feelings expressed by David and others. The authors were not afraid to say how they felt, and God is never hesitant to speak back. I don't know why, but sometimes when I'm praying through lists or while I'm reading the Bible and praying, if I close my eyes, God will give me a vision. Today I kept seeing people hurting. At one point I had to put on worship music to get my focus back on the Lord, I was so distraught about some things I'd seen, and I did not understand. I heard the words from the song,  "so forget about yourself, concentrate on Him, and worship Him," and that snapped me back to reality.

So while praying for our nation, focusing on health and healing, several people on the church prayer lists came to mind, and I began to consider Job's dilemma, thinking about other times when people were in fearful circumstances, needing a word from the Lord. The Lord is always present with us in storms whether we are aware of it or not. Jesus came walking on the water when the disciples were in the storm. They thought He was a ghost at first, then Peter had to test it out. Jesus rebuked the storm, then got in the boat, and He reminded them of the miracle they had just witnessed - the feeding of the 5,000. Nothing is impossible with God. When Jesus and the disciples were crossing over to the other side of the sea after another busy day of preaching, a storm arose while Jesus was sleeping comfortably in spite of the rising water that was filling the boat. When they woke Him up, He silenced the winds and rain, and asked them about their shallow faith. He was right there with them, and they were fearful. God spoke to Elijah in a still small voice after He'd shaken the mountain, blown wind around, then asked Elijah why he'd come. Moses met God in a burning bush in the middle of the wilderness while tending sheep. He even made His presence known as Commander of the Armies of Heaven before Joshua marched around Jericho. His ways are mysterious, but He never fails us, and He definitely knows how to make an entrance!

The visions I had today every time I closed my eyes were glimpses, mere shadows. I guess I was tired, although I had rested well, and it was early when this happened. In the first vision I saw someone I know or knew, as she passed on to heaven not too long ago. Whoever it was, she was crying, in despair, and there was a puppy trying to console her, but even so, unable to help, more was needed. The Lord spoke then and said, "Do not forgive...a staunch, knowing position of hope. Maybe not all, but some will believe. Look how far God has brought you!" The next image I saw was a woman being held in strong arms, mourning, grieving, almost inconsolable. The other was someone at the church, calling out for help, not asking, expecting. And the last image was of a woman, again distressed, and I was talking with her, possibly about advocacy for her need? Where does all this come from in a short space of time. I was reading the Psalms and praying for America. Maybe that should be a clue. Our nation is in desperate need of prayer.

Dreams and visions are not unusual for me, and two of my children have also had dreams. I don't speak about the spiritual realm in this light often, because people are afraid of what they don't know. I've been reading through some of my earlier journals, hoping to find some answers I need for my book, if I ever get it in print. It's interesting when my then eleven year old son tells me God has spoken to him in a dream about getting his life straight. The spiritual warfare has been so brutal lately that I have found it hard to concentrate, and my notes have not been understandable, written in phrases rather than complete sentences. That's why I'm behind in some things, especially posting my blogs. But the notes are here, and I'll get it done. I promised, so I will. Good night. 

Day 151 In the Soaking

 

 5/31/2026

 "Pray for a faith like Job's that will not shrink

when it is washed in the waters of affliction."

Your Daily Walk

 

The past five months I have been in a season of suffering (testing) and disruption (testing), battling against a pernicious foe who would enjoy nothing better than to steal my joy and destroy my life and the lives of my family. When it comes to health issues I don't really get too concerned, and generally tend to find my own solutions. Other things spring up over and over in the family making it difficult to find rest, but I have learned to be content regardless of situations that arise by keeping my focus on Jesus which gives me peace - shalom peace. 

My faithful Alex has been missing on several occasions which causes me concern, but he always manages to reappear. He is a fair weather furry friend, much as humans can be so. I've grown very fond of that feral long haired mongrel, even though he is very fickle when it comes to affection. He does give me a high five though. Do cats normally do that? He has a somewhat sweet disposition, that is, as long as Mia, Daniel's cat is not present. So, in spite of any obstacles, I am managing well, but only because Holy Spirit comforts me and reminds me of the love of God in sending Jesus to die for my sins. That brings everything into perspective, and again, I lift my voice in praise. Praise and gratitude are the BEST weapons!

I've been studying the book of Job over the past few days, and he's been going through a series of events, back to back, and endured the "comfort" of his "friends." Job's adventure came to an end in my reading today after 37 chapters of endless prattle by his three friends. They were determined to give Job godly wisdom and counsel, and although there was a measure of truth in their verbal missiles, their accusations against Job were totally unfounded and not established. Those who criticize others often want to have the final word. A "think on this" or "thus saith me" sort of ending. But it's never really sensible advice, have you noticed that?! Repeatedly Job cried out to God for justice, maintaining his innocence, but he wanted God to give him an explanation about why this happened to him; so finally, after the voices slacked off, God obliged him.

In Job, Chapter 38:1-3:

"Then the Lord answered Job from the whirlwind: 'Why are you using your ignorance to deny my providence? Now get ready to fight, for I am going to demand some answers from you, and you must reply.'" 

God's first question to Job was: "Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me if you know so much." (Job 38:4)

God continues to overwhelm Job with question after question about the logistics of His creation - who laid the cornerstone of the earth, decreed the boundaries, commanded the morning to appear and the darkness to cover the earth? Then he began to question Job about how mountain goats give birth, who gives the horse strength, and enables the eagle to soar. Poor Job must have been bug-eyed and mouth hanging open!  

Finally, God says to Job: "Do you still want to argue with the Almighty? Or will you yield? Do you - God's critic - have the answers?" (Job 40:2)

About now I imagine Job's buddies may have been thinking..."Hmmm, we tried to tell you, Job, but you wouldn't believe you were guilty. Yep, that pride of yours!" Job was pretty shook up I'm sure, humbled that the LORD Almighty was speaking directly to him! So Job response was:

"I am nothing - how could I ever find the answers? I lay my hand upon my mouth in silence. I have said too much already." (Job 40:4)

The Lord again speaks to Job from the whirlwind in Job 40:7-14 saying:

"Stand up like a man and brace yourself for battle. Let me ask you a question, and give me the answer. Are you going to discredit my justice and condemn me, so that you can say you are right? Are you as strong as God, and can you shout as loudly as he? All right then, put on your robes of state, your majesty and splendor. Give vent to your anger. Let it overflow against the proud. Humiliate the haughty with a glance; tread down the wicked where they stand. Knock them into the dust, stone-faced to death. If you can do that, then I'll agree with you that your own strength can save you."

The Lord continues with a conversation regarding the strength of the hippopotamus and then the crocodile. In some translations God calls the latter Leviathan, but His point was that no person can stand against the strength of these creations. In the end Job speaks to God once more, then God turns to the friends, and He gives them a few words. Then, God has Job pray for them, probably so He won't have to deal with their audacity of speaking out of turn. God heals Job, and He restores to Job double of what he had before. He also gave Job seven more sons and three more daughters. The names of the daughters were noted: Jemina, Kezia, and Keren. The daughters were said to be exceptionally beautiful, and the meaning of their names bore witness: The Hebrew meaning of Jemima is "dove" or "bright as day"; Kezia means "cassia" or "cinnamon bark"; and Keren means "horn of beauty".

The story ends well, as Job has been restored, and he lives to the age of 140 to see his grandchildren and great and great-great grandchildren. What a blessing!

God is mysterious in His ways, but one thing I have learned that I am grateful for the hardships, for the pain, and for many experiences. I don't know what tomorrow will bring, or even this afternoon, but I am still grateful for the time He has given me. I can sing in great suffering and intense pain without the luxury of medication. I have moved over thirty times, losing everything many times having to begin again, but it has been worth the wear, because He has been with me, and He has shown me many, many things. He has taught me all I know, and He has given me everything I have - on loan, because everything belongs to Him. We are just stewards of His blessings while sojourners on this earth. I can live with that. In the soaking, in the fire, in the sifting, and the pressing He is here. Nothing else really matters, except in the end I will see Him, and of course, I want to take many with me. Heaven will be too good to miss!