Day 52 Restoration

 

2/21/2026

 "Give of your best to the Master, give of the strength

of your youth; clad in salvation's full armor, 

join in the battle for truth."

 

Moses meticulously followed the design provided to him by God in building the tabernacle, given to him on Mount Sinai while the people remained at the bottom, fearing the voice of the LORD. But, when the time came to actually build the tabernacle, the people willingly brought their gifts to the LORD according to Exodus 25. Their service to the LORD serves as an example to us as believers in Christ when we work together in giving willingly of the gifts God has given to us, so we can in turn serve others. The early church was an example of how God wanted the body of Christ to work. A description of the early church is seen in Acts 4:32: Now the multitude of those who believed were of one heart and one soul; neither did anyone say that any of the things he possessed was his own, but they had all things in common." The scripture goes on to speak of the people selling their lands and houses, giving the money to the disciples, so they could in turn distribute it or use it as needed. Although this sounds like a great way to do things, and I'm all for helping people, especially women in crisis, widows who don't have any responsible family supports, the elderly who sadly don't have support, and the orphans or kids who need homes, sometimes the system fails. If we all realized that everything we have belongs to the Lord anyway, and He is the one who gives us the abilities to earn our livings, the spirit of generosity may work better. Sadly today, however, the bulk of responsibility falls into the hands of government systems that can provide great support, unless the leadership has other plans. I speak of socialism which definitely does not work, because then people become pawns, but it seems as if that is what is happening in places within America, under the guise of assistance and concern. History bears the tale.

Today our Torah portion spoke of the building of this wilderness tabernacle which was a place where all the people gathered. In our houses of gathering, our churches today, we should meet for the purpose of first and foremost being a house of prayer. Jesus boldly spoke these words as he was chasing the money changers out of the temple after His triumphal entry. The church should also be a house of worship, praise, and a place where the Word of God is studied and disciples made, following Jesus' command before He ascended to Heaven. The focus of all church services should be on Jesus, our cornerstone,  the Author and Builder of our faith. Our worship should be focused on Him, purposeful, resolute, steady, conforming to His purpose. We are to be "echad" with God or "one" with God - uniquely His. 

"Now, therefore, you are no longer strangers and foreigners, but fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ Himself being the chief cornerstone, in whom the whole building, being fitted together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord, in whom you also are being built together for a dwelling place of God in the Spirit." (Ephesians 2:19-22)

Pastor Bill reminded us of our need to walk humbly before God, because as He is working in us to conform us to His will, shaping our character to be like His, we are being held to a higher standard. The bar to better conform to God's standards to serve Him better in these last days is being raised as the time grows closer for His return. If we are not walking humbly before our God, not walking in His anointing, we will fail. We can do nothing in our own strength, only in the strength of the Lord, and only as we have His Presence leading us, as it was in the days of Moses. He told God that he couldn't deal with the unruliness of man, and that if He wasn't going with him through this wilderness trek, that he didn't want to go. God, always faithful to His covenant, went before, behind, and beside. Even when they grumbled the loudest, God never abandoned His chosen people, and He never will. How do I know this? Because God repeated it multiple times in the scriptures, and He remains faithful to His people today. The world has yet to realize that, as does much of the body of Christ. His love for His chosen people has never changed, and Israel has the major part in the end time church. This is clearly referenced in both the Old and New Testaments, but again, even the church has gotten the message wrong. Scripture does bear the truth.

"When your days are fulfilled and you rest with your fathers, I will set up your seed after you, who will come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. He shall build a house for My name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. I will be his Father, and he shall be My son. If he commits iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men and with the blows of the sons of men. But My mercy shall not depart from him, as I took it from Saul, whom I removed from before you. And your house and your kingdom shall be established forever before you. Your throne shall be established forever."   (2 Samuel 7:12-16)

"Now the days of David drew near that he should die, and he charged Solomon his son, saying: 'I go the way of all the earth; be strong, therefore, and prove yourself a man. And keep the charge of the LORD your God: to walk in His ways, to keep His statutes, His commandments, His judgments, an His testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn; that the LORD may fulfill His word which He spoke concerning me, saying, 'if your sons take heed to their way, to walk before Me in truth with all their heart and with all their soul," He said 'you shall not lack a man on the throne of Israel.'" (1 Kings 21-4)

"For thus says the LORD: 'David shall never lack a man to sit on the throne of the house of Israel." (Jeremiah 33:17)

"In mercy the throne will be established; and One (Jesus) will sit on it in truth, in the tabernacle of David (Mount Zion in Jerusalem), judging and seeking justice and hastening righteousness." (Isaiah 16:5) (The parentheses above are my explanations for clarity.)

"'On that day I will raise up the tabernacle of David, which has fallen down, and repair its damages; I will raise up its ruins, and rebuild it as in the days of old; that they may possess the remnant of Edom, and all the Gentiles who are called by My name,' says the LORD who does this thing.'" (Amos 9:11-12)

"It shall come to pass in that day that the Lord shall set His hand again the second time to recover the remnant of His people who are left, from Assyria and Egypt, from Pathros and Cush, from Elam and Shinar, from Hamath and the islands of the sea. He will set up a banner for the nations, and will assemble the outcasts of Israel, and gather together the dispersed of Judah from the four corners of the earth." (Isaiah 11:11-12)

Isn't it exciting that God is faithful to His promises, to His covenants, and if we as Gentiles are faithful to Him, faithful to His Son, receiving His wonderful gift of eternal life, we are grafted into the vine and have a part. Israel will be restored, and Jesus will return as described to David's tabernacle on Mount Zion in Jerusalem and establish His throne. If we read the scriptures, and if we pay careful attention to God's Living Word, we can clearly see the truth. All such good news! Yet many are missing it.

Day 51 Caught in the Middle

 

2/20/2026

 "Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; but 

we will trust in the Name of the LORD our God."

Psalm 20:7

 

For the past two days I have been running interference between two opposing forces within my home, namely two cats. One a stubborn, ruler of the household, a calico named Mia who thinks she's the princess and the other cat is the buffoon. My cat, Alex, is the miniature Maine Coon, a semi-feral rascal who has decided to have domestic tendencies when it is convenient for him, such as extremely cold, ice and snowy weather when roughing it outside is not quite as enjoyable, regardless of the fact that he has a nice cat home filled with warm straw and blankets, if he wants it. He and Mia have been starring each other down, and jealous of each other's bowls of food. Mia has a special diet for stomach issues, and the food is for older, house cats who never venture past the door to go outside. Alex, on the other hand, probably can eat just about anything and be content, but we try to provide a better quality of kibble type food, as he does not enjoy wet food or fresh. He's relatively easy to please, but he does like clean water, as does Mia. In fact Mia complains several times a day if her water is not changed. When Alex decides to sleep over or stop over for a short visit, it's hard to keep Mia from standing her ground. It can become interesting, but at least it keeps my mind off other things that are much more problematic. I guess everyone needs a temporary diversion away from the news of the world. These two misbehaving felines provide that for me.

Events are happening way too quickly, but I can't say that I am surprised. All one has to do is pick up the Bible, and things are spelled out in compelling fashion for one who wants to know what is happening and why. Honestly, I get tired of trying to help people understand it, even though it is from the only trustworthy source - the Word of God. People much more prefer the deception of social media. Why I will never know. As the Bible says, and as I have often repeated, it is "as in the days of Noah...!" Right now The Chosen Con is going on, and listening to the story or binging the series is a real reminder that many do not have a clue as to what is happening, especially the church. And that is especially disconcerting since pastors should understand the Bible, but they don't. In fact many could care less about anything written in the Old Testament, because they feel it is not relevant for today. That seems interesting to me since it is so often quoted in the New Testament. With all the different translations that try to make the Word easier to understand, much has been lost in the context. This is dangerous, as we are not to add or take away from scripture. 

Shabbat began tonight at 6 pm, so I have a time of rest, and I really need the quietness and alone time with friends and Jesus. Tomorrow in the global call, we'll share communion, so weekends are truly restful, contemplative times for me, as we worship and study together. Later I may make a big bowl of popcorn and actually watch a movie, When Calls the Heart, a series based on books by Janette Oke of the same title. I was very encouraged with her writing when I was younger, as she began writing at the age of 50 years. She is in her 90's now, and she has authored about 75 books, all Christian fiction, all wonderfully written. That truly is a relaxing way to enjoy my day of rest. The popcorn with a few Junior Mints make for good company as well. Believe me, I need to find a way to rest after some of the news we pray about when we have our calls. This is why my days begin with worship, and our calls begin and end with worship. The battle belongs to the Lord, and He goes before us and protects us. We will not fear.

It's easy to get all worked up about the injustice of things that happen, or become involved with the intrigue, although I hardly find it fascinating, just difficult to understand how our nation has fallen to such depths of depravity, but then I talk about this way too often, and tonight I only want to say that my focus will remain on the Lord, the Commander of the Armies of Heaven, and as the scripture above says, I will not trust in horses or chariots or any of the modern age methods of diplomacy. Whereas I understand, and I live in the world, I do not have to become ensnared with it, as my citizenship is in heaven, and I am only a brief sojourner in this land that will soon pass away. While here, however, I remain faithful and ever diligent to the call of intercession standing on the wall, arms linked in prayer with my prayer team, our eyes on the prize of the high calling of Jesus Christ. 

Day 50 Sacrifice and Joy

 

2/19/2026

 "Let the words of my mouth, and the

meditation of my heart, be acceptable in Thy

sight, O LORD, my strength and my redeemer."

Psalm 19:14

 

These past few days have involved much deep soul searching, not so much initiated by myself, as spurred on by events of which I am a part coupled with my desire as an intercessor to keep myself ever before the LORD, faithful to His call. One of my greater needs, I have found, has been to simplify outside distractions while balancing those things I must do routinely and as part of my daily human existence. Perhaps that's not spoken in clear terms. I have meetings I feel committed to attend, and others that I do not have to always attend. The volume of emails with invitations that I receive daily have become staggering, so I am ending up deleting most after I breeze over the introductory content. All of that has to be balanced with the ins and outs of running a home that is in great need of repair. My holidays of Christmas, New Years, Hanukkah, and others were different this season because of the loss of transportation and the events surrounding it. So, life for me has become impossibly intense. Now, as I explained yesterday, several seasons of prayer are blending into the others, as we wait to see what will happen to the people of Iran. So, still, life goes on.

This evening I began to watch segments of The Chosen Con available to fans who could not attend the live event. Any time I watch The Chosen or listen to the actors who play the disciples and other characters in the series share their feelings in playing these parts, I choke up and weep uncontrollably for the work that has gone into this series by Dallas Jenkins and his amazing team. It opens a new world of understanding to me, and I am very much aware of the Biblical accounts of the life of Jesus, and how He gave His life for me on that cross. But, seeing it played out with such passion and hearing how it has effected the lives of everyone who has been involved with the production and everyone who sees it can become overwhelming. It is a story that must be told, and it it has been beautifully woven into a masterful rendering of the life of Christ and His disciples. It breaks me just hearing the actors speak of what they encountered on a personal level, because I can understand how I have been forever changed. We are all waiting anxiously for Season 6 the story of the crucifixion to be released, and quite honestly, I don't know how I will be able to bear it. His sacrifice for my sins, how I nailed Him to the cross for my transgressions, wipes me out, breaks my heart. Since the day I actually was given a vision of Jesus pouring out His life blood for my sins, my life has never been the same. Once seeing Him on the cross for me, I can never unsee it. He died for me.

These verses come to mind, as does the one listed above which has become my daily prayer: 

"The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple. The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes. The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever; the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether. More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb." Psalm 19:7-10

The message His death has given me is the command He leaves with His disciples before He ascends to His Father in Heaven. And that is to go into all the world and make disciples. Share the good news. Do not be afraid of what man can do to me, because man will certainly disagree and try to cause harm. We are seeing this in our world today. I have spoken of spiritual blindness even in the church, but Jesus warned about the coming apostasy, as did Paul in his epistles. My part is to spread the word to others, and to stand as a watchman on the wall of prayer for Israel, refuting the lies told about God's chosen people and about their part in the redemption of mankind. We each have a part in the telling of the story of Jesus Christ, the Messiah. We must be faithful to what God has revealed to us. It is not easy to deny oneself, take up the cross daily and follow Him, as He requires of those who follow Him, but it is the only life I know, and it is the only life that I want to live. Once one comes to the place of surrender, it becomes possible, but only through Him. He carries us all the way. He never leaves us alone. That is joy unspeakable and full of glory. Selah.

Day 49 As the World Turns

 

2/18/2026

 "Thy words were found, and I did eat them, 

and Thy word unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart,

for I am called by Thy name, O LORD God of hosts."

Jeremiah 15:16

 

Today is Ash Wednesday which marks the countdown to Easter. It is also day one of the thirty days of Ramadan for the Muslim people. This day began with a 5.5 magnitude earthquake in the ancient Persian city of Shushan in Iran. This is the city where Queen Esther lived and where the enemy of Israel, Haman, was hung on his own gallows meant for Mordecai, Esther's cousin, who raised her and was living in Persia with those exiled from Israel. Haman hated Mordecai, because he was a despised Jew who would not bow to him as he passed by. At that time Haman was the high ranking prime minister to the King of Persia King Ahasuerus, his trusted assistant. The Feast of Purim, celebrated in the month of Adar, which began yesterday, will be be observed March 2-4 with fasting and prayer. The month of Adar is a month of celebration and happiness, in spite of what is happening in Israel and in Iran today. 

This is also a time when the young people and certain groups within Israel are fasting and prayer up to Passover for revival in the land. Many are seeking the face of Messiah Christ Jesus in repentance and for salvation for the people who do not yet know Him as Savior and Lord. This is also the American season of Lent leading up to Easter, as I briefly mentioned previously. It is a time when many consecrate a fast, but many give up something, withhold a pleasure or make some offer, in respect and observance of this holy time of the year. 

Much is happening in this world that is not consecrated unto a holy God, nor is it a time of seeking peace and revival. It is a time of uproar, chaos, and much confusion. While I stand in the gap for my nation,  Israel and the Iranian/Persian people, I stand in the gap representing the persecuted nations of this world. It saddens me, as I know that it saddens God, to see all that is happening, and to receive daily news of devastating events or political decisions or mandates that are contrary to His laws. Watching our government here in the United States of America slowly fall, while our present administration is trying with all its heart to see America return to One Nation Under God, as our forefathers established in our Constitution and Declaration of Independence, I feel the urgency to provide encouragement. I must say sadly again, there are so many educated people who do not know what is written on the pages of these documents, nor do they take the time to look before they cast their votes against a good work, falling much deeper into darkness for the unwillingness to know the foundational beliefs of our country that made it a great nation and a free one. The news that is being broadcast, opening the eyes of those who desire truth, is deplorable, unconscionable, and unholy to the extreme, as are many decisions being made by our government today. Why is it that man prefers to listen to man, and he does not take the time to ask our Sovereign God, or even to take the time to read the documents for which they support. Our enemy is a deceiver, and he parades as an angel of light, deceiving many, even the church leaders who spread the deception ignorantly on to their flock. It is a sorrowful thing to see.

I want to encourage those who are standing with our God and Savior, those who truly want to walk in holiness and righteousness towards God and man, by enclosing the following words from teachers and pastors I have grown to trust and God's Holy Scriptures:

"If we wish to pray with confidence and gladness, then the words of Holy Scripture will have to be the solid basis of our prayer. For here we know that Jesus Christ, the Word of God, teaches us to pray. The words which come from God become, then, the steps on which we find our way to God." Dietrich Bonhoeffer

"Would that we might learn from our Lord Jesus how impossible it is to walk with God, to obtain God's blessing or leading, or to do His work joyously and fruitfully, apart from close unbroken fellowship with Him who is ever a living fountain of spiritual life and power!"   Andrew Murray

"In the beginning was the Word, and The Word was with God, and the Word was God." John 1:1 

"Jesus said to him, 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.'" John 14:6 

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.'" John 13:34-35 

"He that abides in Me, and I in him, the same brings forth much fruit." John 15:9 

"All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. God therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Matthew 28:18-20

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." John 3:16-17

“The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”  2 Peter 3:9

"This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all." 1 John 1:5

 

Day 48 Character Shaping

 

2/17/2026

 "Reputation is what others think you are;

character is what God knows you are!"

Daily Walk

 

Over the past several months I feel as if the Lord has been pruning me, reminding me of things I had locked deeply away, causing me to remember painful memories, and getting me to check my motives and refocus my thoughts. This morning in my devotional reading the following questions were asked:

"What circumstances has God brought into your life to build your character: a difficult relationship? a conflict at work? a physical or financial problem?"

My thoughts went back several years ago to a couple of situations involving the job I was working, challenged by different personalities and situations. Remembering back to a time when I was accused of saying some things in my new position, supposedly exalting myself. I didn't understand where this accusation came from, as I always quiet, and I hardly spoke a word. I was insecure in my position, so I definitely had no interest whatsoever in a higher one. I was devastated as I endured three horrendous first months in that position, until finally the person who had falsely accused me left the job along with everyone else. I was the last man standing, but I persevered. I didn't run away and hide, although I cried enough tears to float a boat. I'll never understand why this happened, but I certainly was relieved when I was vindicated. After that incident, there came another time, a few years later, when a disgruntled employee tried to include me in her vendetta, but I squashed that attempt face on. I didn't go behind anyone's back, I handled it straight on and politely. When the manager called me, she told me that she never thought I'd been involved, as she knew my character. That meant the world to me, as I represent Jesus, and I am very low key, mind my own business, try to be helpful, and do the best job I can. We are to do everything as unto the Lord, and I have always tried to follow that command. I can also be my own worst enemy by over thinking every decision I made then and do now. I just want to honor God, because I've not always been the person He has made me today. 

I am not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, and Holy Spirit is faithful to let me know when I am missing the mark. I've had and continue to have difficult relationships. I try to guard my heart and not react defensively, but I have failed. Right now I am waiting for someone to return my call who becomes upset with me often, but I pray that when the call does come, things can be resolved. My heart is easily broken, because I don't like wasted time.Time is precious, and we are told to number our days. 

The greatest recent challenge I have faced happened in early December with the loss of our vehicles. My son was involved in a type of hit and run accident, where another vehicle knocked my car off the road into a ditch, thankfully not injuring my son or taking his life, but my car was totaled. Then our back up vehicle, my dad's old car, had seen its last days, so it could not be repaired. It took a couple of months to get through all of that, and we finally located a good used car that was delivered today. We are thankful for the blessing, and we hope to get on the road soon to check out our investment. There were many stressful days, involving side issues with health, but I pray that our wait is indeed over, and that we made a good decision. Time will tell. I must say that the enemy tried to cause some problems from every conceivable direction, but our faith remained strong. I'm not certain why all of this happened, but I know that it has been a special time of introspection, sitting with the Lord, listening to His counsel. Perhaps it was meant to be a time of quieting my spirit, so that I could sit with the Lord a little longer. I don't know, but what I do know is that I learned many things, and I was able to look within myself and see some things that needed to be changed.

Not too long ago the Lord gave me a vision about going further out into the deep, and I believe that this is part of that vision. There is always further to go, and while I am listening and walking in obedience and faith, I realize that the enemy is going to bring in more distractions. I can almost sit here and list the number of arrows flying past my head, attempting to throw my attention off of Jesus onto other things. But I know that my victory is in Christ, and He has already won the battle. The battle is never ours to fight. It belongs to the Lord who made heaven and earth, and He never slumbers nor sleeps. 

Day 47 Seeing is Believing!

 

 2/16/2026

"For the earth will be filled
With the knowledge of the glory of the Lord,
As the waters cover the sea."

 Habakkuk 2:14

 

When Moses sent the twelve spies into the promised land to spy it out, he asked them to make a list of what they saw. They traveled about all the country for 40 days, and when they returned they brought back one branch with one cluster of grapes that needed two men to carry it on a pole. They also brought back samples of pomegranates and figs. They reported that the land was certainly a land flowing with milk and honey, but they reported that the cities were fortified and giants roamed the land. The caused the people to fear, especially when the ten naysayers said they had seen giants in the land that made them look like grasshoppers! Fortunately, two of the spies were very positive about the land's richness, and they believed without a doubt that they could conquer the land with God's help. But, the crying and moaning led to rebellion, and even though Moses and Aaron interceded for the lot, the ten spies lost their lives, and the whole generation, except for Caleb and Joshua, lost their lives in the 40 years of wandering in the wilderness - one year for each of the 40 days - because of their unbelief. 

Sadly, things haven't changed much in modern days, as there is a LOT of moaning, complaining, and much disbelief. In fact many do not believe in the power of an Almighty God, even though He has proven Himself over and over. In Moses' day it wasn't enough to witness the defeat of Pharaoh and his armies at the Red Sea or to receive the manna and meat God provided each day, as well as the protection of His Presence in the cloud by day and the fire by night. God never left them alone; He accompanied them all the way. The wilderness years proved God's faithfulness over and over, His daily provision of food continued right up until they entered Canaan. He helped them fight the enemy more than once, and He sent angels into the Promised Land to chase out the enemies. God's covenant made with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob continued, as did the covenant made with Moses at Mount Sinai. God is faithful to His word. 

"The words of the LORD are pure words, like silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times" (Psalm 12:6).

"The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, make wise the simple" (Psalm 19:7).

"Forever, O LORD, Your word is settled in heaven" (Psalm 119:89).

When speaking of truth, Winston Churchill said, "Panic may resent it, ignorance may deride it, malice may distort it, but there it is."  

My devotional put it this way: "Truth is unchangeable." Why don't we believe God? Why don't we take Him at His Word? Isn't seeing believing?

Day 46 Step Out!

 

2/15/2026

"How is God stretching your faith today?" 

Daily Walk 

 

It seems as if everyone has an opinion about just about everything these days! I was just talking with my son about the possibility of a new adventure - a job opening that offers national and international travel. It's involving books, and I love to read, although I must admit that I haven't had much time to read anything other than scriptures and prayer points lately. I do have my quiet time in the morning, but in the evenings I am generally trying to finish my blog, or trying to catch up, and I have to prepare for my group meeting on Thursday or another event. Still, I do manage to squeeze in a chapter or two of a missionary story now and then. I want to do better this year, so I am stacking the books in a pile on the window seat in my bedroom. Maybe that will encourage me to read more, or at best, to dust more. Sometimes my life gets a bit intense...well, maybe it is intense, but I do watch an occasional movie to wind down and prove that I am normal - whatever normal is! But then, I had to repent recently for asking God to make me normal, and I don't think that is His plan for me. At least not in the sense that I wanted normal to be.

My son didn't think that this job would be a "fit" for me, because he said I didn't fit the mold! What does that even mean? When I asked him that question, he flat out told me that I'm too old! "People want Gen Z," he said. Imagine that? My son saying his mother is too old to get a job. It makes me want to apply just to see if he's right. I told him that I could clean up very nicely, thank you, Mister, but he only smiled. He doesn't think I understand what he is trying to convey to me, but I really do. Still, my competitive spirit wanted to show him he was the one who did not get it. I may yet have miles to go before I sleep!

This is a fine introduction to my question noted above about how God is stretching my faith. I did make a recent decision to change some things with my finances, not that I really have any true money coming in. But I'm stepping out in faith, plus I have been asked to consider another possibility as well. I'm still waiting for my car to be delivered, and that has proven to be another step for me that has been uncomfortable. I was so used to my car, because I had Nissie since his infancy, so we grew together over the years. Right now, as a retired person, not as "fluid" in cash flow as I was when I was working, I can't afford to take risks having debts and car payments. Life is full of daily surprises, and God is teaching me that He provides for my needs, which I already know, as He's been taking care of me all my life. He's the one who gives me opportunities, so perhaps He's the one I should consult about the job I mentioned above. And, everything I have, including money, is His anyway, on loan to me. But one step at a time. 

This weekend Pastor Jack was teaching from Romans 15:30-33 finishing the Apostle Paul's letter to the Romans he was writing from Corinth. In this portion of the epistle Paul is sharing his desire to meet with the Christians in Rome, asking them to come along with him through the Lord Jesus Christ through the love of the Spirit of the Lord within them, striving together with him in prayer. His one desire is to preach the gospel, the message of Jesus Christ to anyone and everyone who will listen. He wants them to share the same enthusiasm and love of Christ that he has. Of course hanging with Paul, preaching the good news, became dangerous, as not everyone received the message. Paul had no problem with angry crowds. Pastor Jack said that in studying he found out that Paul was a little man, frail, older at this point with bowed legs from walking so much, and of course he had been beaten, stoned, ship wrecked, and jailed in chains many times, but he was still a power house for God. He was beheaded in the end, but the fact is that he was so transformed from the proud, arrogant younger man, Saul of Tarsus, who persecuted, tortured, and put believers in jail, was that his obsession for the old man became a passion for the new man crucified with Christ. He wasn't afraid, and death held no sway over him. When Paul was being transferred to Rome, he had 270 armed soldiers traveling with him, and he was chained, as they feared for his life. Remember he's a frail, older man at this stage, humble, non-threatening yet with a powerful message of the cross of Christ. Although Paul was humble and surrendered to God, knowing that he did not have to rely on any man's support, because God provided all the resources he needed, still God put him to the test.

In 2 Corinthians 12 Paul describes how he was given visions and revelations of the Lord. He didn't know if he was in the body or out of the body, but he says that he was caught up into Paradise to meet the Lord and shown things about the future. He later states that just so he would not become proud or feel "exalted" that he was given a thorn in the flesh, described as a messenger of Satan to "buffet" him. There have been many speculations about his "thorn," but no one knows for certain where it was physical or otherwise. Paul was indeed a very humble man, compassionate, eager to share the gospel message, and he was grateful that he was chosen to take the message to the Gentiles. I have wondered if perhaps I have been given a thorn in the flesh with this incessant noise in my head that gets louder some days than others. I in no way can be compared to the man of God Paul was, but sometimes I wonder if God uses such things to get our attention. He chooses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise, so I don't know. 

Paul's entire journey in faith, responding to the plan of God for his life, was one of stepping out, not looking back, focused on the call of God, directed by the voice of Holy Spirit leading him and holding him back, if he wanted to go before it was time for him to go. This is the life I want, and I pray it is the life that I am living for Christ, as I yield myself to Him daily. My attempts to blog is a lesson in faith, and of often going way past my comfort zone. God has drawn me into some tight circles of friends, although I'm unknown to them, but they consider me and the others like me, to be family. I don't understand many things in my life, I just try to be obedient to His voice. Maybe that is my normal?!