Sandcastles & Best Laid Plans

 "Days come and go. Seasons ebb and flow.

Every sunrise which becomes a sunset whispers the secret, 

"Time will take away your sandcastle."

Max Lucado

And the Angels were Silent

For the past thirty minutes I have been playing, whiling away the minutes on Pinterest. It really is a nice, relaxing, altogether fun pastime that more people ought to indulge. When I have much on my mind, which is often, and I don't want to deal with it, also often, I tend to sidetrack a bit until the wind stops blowing, and the space between my ears calms down. This New Year started as a whirlwind for me, and an ever-growing "list" of "to-dos." Not resolutions, mind you, just things that needed to be prioritized. This week was well-planned out, but everything has gone awry thus far, so my head is spinning. Snoopy and Winnie the Pooh help me focus a bit more clearly...and laugh hysterically. For a brief period of time I am a child again, laughing, enjoying the moment at play. Not a bad way to spend a morning or a life. My imagination keeps me going many days. I am after all a dreamer, a writer, and "a picture is worth a thousand words."

When January rolled in rather quickly for me, I was in a dither about my word for the year that I wanted to be my focus, to keep me in line with my hopes. After wrestling with God about "well-laid plans," I knew instinctively that my word is "Surrender." In fact, that is my goal, my purpose for my life. I can control nothing! This week thus far has proven that fact clearly. And, honestly, I don't want to control anything. I want my dependence to be on my Abba Father who never fails me. Worrying about "what if" has driven me nuts, so much so that I can't assimilate written messages. I cannot rush, change, or deviate from certain circumstances that have been set into motion, so I need to focus on what I can do today, in the moment, and do it faithfully and completely. God is in control, not me! If I trust Him to direct my path, then I need to trust Him.

So, I am making daily attempts to ride the wave of life and not to fear if the current shifts beneath me or even if the undercurrent drags me under. I've been there, done that in life and not just metaphorically. Very unpleasant being pulled under and dragged down, then up, then down again, with not a soul around to help. But I survived then, and I most certainly will survive anything I face today...and tomorrow...until my race is done. As Paul so aptly puts in in 2 Timothy 4:7-8 (NLT): "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me - the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing." That's what I want - to be found faithful, to hear the words "well done."

I love parables and metaphors. In the quotation from Max Lucado at the beginning of this blog, he used "sandcastles" as a metaphor for life. The scripture he used with this quotation was not the one I immediately thought, but it definitely had the same meaning. In Matthew 6:20-21 Jesus says: "Don't store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be." 

Each day I thank God for what each day brings, and I try to see everything that happens as a lesson to teach me, train and prepare me for the next step in my journey. I refuse to see negatives and allow them to attempt to steal my joy. I have my ups and downs, but I am purposeful in my desire to have an attitude of gratitude no matter what presents itself on a daily basis. Although there have been days, sometimes several in a row, where the only reason I get up is to go to work, because it is expected of me, I still get up. I still keep going. I am being faithful to what God has for me to do at that time, on that day. I am a survivor. Weekends can be harder, because I am usually not working, and although I love to attend church, and praising the Lord is how I lift myself from the miry pit, there are times when it is a struggle. But, I thank God for Flatirons Church. The senior pastor and his staff are not afraid to admit that they struggle with life's challenges. We are imperfect, but we love Jesus. I love ragamuffins. I am one. Brennan Manning defines a "Ragamuffin" as follows: “Ragamuffins are the unsung assembly of saved sinners who are little in their own sight and aware of their brokenness and powerlessness before God. A ragamuffin knows he’s only a beggar at the door of God’s mercy.” For me, embracing this truth allows me to have more compassion and love for my fellow man. We are all imperfect. No Christian has arrived. Jesus loves us. Plain and simple. To quote Rich Mullins, "God's already knocked out by us." He looks at us, and He sees Jesus.

Some people are always trying to tell me that God has forgiven me, so I need to forgive myself. I finally realized that it is impossible to forgive myself, because forgiveness costs. Jesus has already paid that price for me. He died for my sins. Otherwise, I would not need a Savior. It can be a tough one to wrap your brain around, but try to do it. It will save you a lot of shaming and quilting yourself. Believe me, I know. I have regrets in life, but I am forgiven. Thank You, Jesus, for giving Your life for mine. Now I need to focus on finishing the race, keeping the faith. I want my life to be well-lived, not a sandcastle washing away in the tides.