The Battle Continues

Today I am feeling the heartache of betrayal once more. It seems to be a daily event these days. This one cut a bit more deeply, as my one consistent support was ripped away yesterday afternoon. This past year has been devastating for me as I have stood alone in a battle of which I never asked to be a part. The stand has cost me everything.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I still will not waver in my belief that God is in control. I may not see His hand at work, or understand why things happen and continue to change, but I do know in my heart, as broken as it is, that my God loves me, and whatever happens He will be with me.

Many friends I care about have felt the sharp pangs of betrayal, and I imagine it is only the beginning as the time approaches for the return of our Lord. This has been prophesied, and our only security is in our relationship with Jesus. I find myself thinking about Job in the Bible, and the things he endured. The length of time he suffered is not really clear, but what is clear is that he never gave up. There were times of weakness when he cried out to God wondering why, but he never took his wife's negative stand, and he didn't let  his so-called friends get the best of him. As it turns out God asks Job to pray for his accusers. He also firmly asked Job who he was to question Him.

I cannot begin to understand the whys and wherefores of this present place I am in, but I have to believe that I will become a stronger person, more like my Jesus, who truly gave everything to stand in our place and die so we could live.

My elderly friend's husband died this week on the second anniversary of the passing of their daughter. This couple met in high school and had a fairy tale marriage up until a few years ago when age and circumstances began to force a change. Now my dear friend has lost her soul mate, and she wants so much to join him. She feels she has nothing left to give. I told her I could not begin to imagine how she must feel, as I never had that kind of a relationship, and now I never can. That's because their marriage spanned a lifetime, til death do us part. That's a beautiful legacy of love few ever truly share. What a blessing in a time of intense loss and sorrow.

All around us is discord and malcontent in one way or another. The answer for most is more money to fix things, but money is not the answer to the world's problems any more than possessions we have acquired. The answer for the problems, the heartache and disappointments is Jesus. I posted a song recently written by John Lennon called Imagine, about a world where there was no war or famine or sadness, people living together in harmony. The lyrics are idyllic and peaceful. They sound like my idea of heaven:

"Imagine"

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today... Aha-ah...

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion, too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace... You...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world... You...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one 

 

 

I'm a dreamer, so I understand the concept of the song written from the heart of a man who wanted only peace in his life. That's not any different than any of us dreamers really. I dream of a life where people care about each other, support, and help others. Someone to put their arm around a friend and just be there. It's not that hard, but it requires time, and we have all grown so jealous of our time. We hold onto it, because we are barely living life now. We waste more time than live it as we are engaged in the relentless pursuit of making ends meet. Families do not know each other, husbands and wives never have a moment just to be a couple. Something needs to change, and this is what I am trying to do with my life. I guess that threatens the enemy, although I cannot understand why he bothers with someone so insignificant as me. It doesn't really matter, as regardless of what he does or doesn't do, I will not back down. I believe in heaven on earth, and one day I will see it.