As a case manager I learned that in dealing with goals in life we must first identify the problems. So we look at what changes are necessary in order to accomplish goals, such as health oriented, emotional, relational, and identify those areas of life creating the Problem. So if a person determines that his medical diagnosis of diabetes is the problem area, goals need to be set in order to overcome the problems associated with said disease. He may decide that he wants to work on maintaining healthy glucose levels by watching his diet, following the physician's prescribed care, and exercising regularly. So he has established three goals. Get the idea. Next he has to determine if any Barriers exist that hinder him in meeting these goals. For instance with regard to regular exercise, a person may have something that hinders him from working out or even taking a daily walk. Maybe the neighborhood is infested with ankle nipping attack geese which prevent him from enjoying a nice brisk walk down the road? I guess it truly would be a brisk walk if attack geese were fast on your heels! So he has now identified a Barrier to walking daily. So, next he looks at...can you guess it......how can he get rid of the geese? So we put our heads together, and we come up with an appropriate Interaction. Since this is a hypothetical scenario I am not going to tell you how to get rid of these annoying geese. If it were me I'd take a different route, as I have encountered a goose honking ankle nipper, and it was not pleasant. Plus the rascal was persistent. If you're nipped enough times you'll soon appreciate allowing the little guy his space. But now you get the picture and a little deeper glimpse of what I do for a living. I am a problem solver, and a pretty good one actually. For other people, that is!
So here we go. We are thinking about Necessary Endings in our life. Things that get in the way of our accomplishing better goals. Setting priorities, making better choices for our life. Ones that produce fruit, opportunities for growth, and the anticipated happy endings. As I go through this exercise I hope you'll not be so intent on studying my crazy life, and the changes I want to make. My purpose is to help you as I am learning and putting into practice what I am gleaning and applying for myself. I don't know, maybe you are content exactly where you are, and I am glad you are! My older son told me once he was full of "wanderlust"; perhaps he got a bit of that from me. Always wanting to see what is around the bend in the road, discovering new things, places, people, life in its entirety. Nothing wrong with that as long as it doesn't interfere with other people along for the ride.
So, what is holding you back, if anything? What do you need to change in your life so you can start to get going on your dreams, ambitions? For me my number one Problem is Relationships. I need to start focusing on myself and allow others to wallow in their own stew. We all have to get to a place where we are broken, dead to ourselves, and willing to grab God's hand in faith, entrusting our lives to doing things His way. Sometimes, even though our focus is on doing the right thing, outside drama pulls us in, sucking the life out of us, draining our emotions, flooding our time, until we find ourselves back where we started again. For me it has to end. Enough already!
I am a survivor! I love people, but I value alone time. It's my think time. My time to listen and know I can be heard. Without a word, without a whisper, to know. It's a great feeling,, and I have learned to value this time. Does that mean I won't have time for people? Absolutely and emphatically not! I will always be an advocate for the ones I love. I will always have time to help others along the way. The difference is knowing when to say "yes" and when to say "no". In that I need to develop a thicker hide.
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