Beat Goes On

The past three weeks continue to drag me down as I attempt to play "catch up" after my vacation, my surgery, and let us not forget the ongoing and grueling physical therapy twice weekly in Santa Fe, which takes an hour and a half  travel time at the end of a full workday of juggling visits, phone calls, and the last minute trainings and meetings,  all in anticipation of imminent surgery.  Whew!  No wonder I'm tired!

Otherwise, life is fun.  My mind is never dull, never relaxes, and my imagination takes me soaring to places of unbelievable wanderings.  Did that make sense?  Nonetheless this is who I am, and I guess what I do.  I am an entertainer at heart.  The hard part is trying to pep some of my energy into others in my life.  I miss my kids when they were young.  I guess I pumped so much enthusiasm into them that as adults the idea of a "puppet show" sends them packing!  No matter, I have enough enthusiasm to go around.  Remember the "Energizer Rabbit"?  I guess that's me - a never ending burst of energy.  The really interesting part is that all this energy comes when I am the busiest!  Go figure!

This month is Pastor Appreciation Month, so I have been actively involved in rallying the troops to give this our best effort for Pastor Tom.  I think sometimes that my mind works so fast that it overwhelms folks, as when I speak my thoughts are at the end of the road before I even mention the first idea.  I have already thought it out, and I guess I think they have absorbed it by osmosis. A little unrealistic, and the bad part is that I have done this all my life.  I think I have already said something, but I have fast-forwarded in my mind to the closing thought and out it comes.  Gee, it must be hard being my friend.  On more levels than one.

Maybe it's time for me to slow down my brain, learn to relax a bit and let other people come up with ideas and do the talking. Yeah, just sit on the sidelines and watch it happen rather than trying to make it happen.  What do you think? Is it time the ole gal stopped playing cheerleader and retired to the sidelines and the back pew at church?  Or do I keep rallying for the cause?!  Something to think about, eh?  In the meantime I think I will continue to march to the beat of the drum.

Catch ya later!

 

 

Welcome to Life for the Living

"The need of the hour is not so much to 

discuss the Bread of Life as to break it and pass it

out to the hungry multitude."

Your Daily Walk

from

The Daily Walk Bible

Are you living life and loving it?  I am.  Each day is a new adventure, but the rewards of even the difficult times are undeniably profitable to say the least!

Yesterday I survived my left eye surgery, and last night after my interesting day at the mill, I enjoyed a Bible study with warm, embracing misfits.  I think the more I revisit my wonderful friend, Brennan Manning, who authored "The Ragamuffin Gospel" and share with my Bible study group the simplicity of the gospel and the immense love and patience God showers on us, I think our group and my future homes should be called..."Home for Ragamuffins, Misfits, and Rabble"!  My son, Daniel, seemed to enjoy this fresh idea, as he can be closely identified with his mother as one of the misfits of our time as well as a non-conformer.

At first when I shared with my friends in Christ that God said our Bible study would be the first of my "misfit toys" gatherings, they looked somewhat askance at me, as if to say, "me a misfit? how dare you!".  But they love me for who I am, so they didn't say a word, only smiled and waited.  Last night I read to them the words I posted from Brennan Manning's preface to his book, and they voiced both understanding and agreement and wanted to read the book.  So we're making some progress here, and I am being loved for who I am as I don't pretend to be anyone other than just me.  It's nice to be loved, wouldn't you say?

Today as the anesthesia wears off, I am still bouncing off the walls with my great enthusiasm for the things I am learning, re-learning, and finally absorbing into this somewhat thick skull about the life I've lived and the one I am yet to visit as I remain on this earth. When I reflect on the past, I am no longer allowing myself to drift into the "what ifs" of my former days, rather I can agree with my adversary quickly that while, yes I have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, I have a Savior who died for ALL my sins, and I a new creation, because He loved me and died so I could live!  So the next the "what if" demon is trying to hang over your shoulder and bring you down, just agree quickly and respond in kind.  Then tell the loser of all times to take a leap! It works for me.

The day is scurrying along, and I must focus on the tasks of the day, so I'll leave you with these thoughts, and a prayer that you be encouraged in your daily walk through life, looking forward, never behind, living the life of grace!

Hope your day is unencumbered and blessed as I know mine will be!

A Testimony by Rich Mullins

Testimony

 

by Rich Mullins

 

 

 

I owe Brennan Manning thirty dollars for lecture tapes I bought from him on an IOU. I’m not writing this testimony because of that debt. I simply mention it because indebtedness is a condition indicative of ragamuffins—a condition we all share, until we lose ourselves in the liberating, healing, invigorating truth to which these pages bear testimony.

My introduction to Brennan Manning’s work came on a drive south from Manhattan, Kansas, through the edge of the Flinthills. It is a beautiful drive, best accompanied by the music of Aaron Copeland. Or by pure silence. When a friend put a tape of one of Manning’s lectures in my truck’s tape player, I objected. But my friend said, “Just give it ten minutes.”

Five minutes later, I steered the truck onto the shoulder of the road. My eyes were so full of tears, I could not see to drive.

 I have attended church regularly since I was less than a week old. I’ve listened to sermons about virtue, sermons against vice. I have heard about money, time management, tithing, abstinence, and generosity. I’ve listened to thousands of sermons. But I could count on one hand the number that were a simple proclamation of the gospel of Christ.

That proclamation is the message I heard that day. And it did what the gospel can’t help but do: It broke the power of mere “moralistic religiosity” in my life and revived a deeper acceptance that had long ago withered in me.

In our society, we tend to swear unyielding allegiance to a rigid position, confusing that action with finding an authentic connection to a life-giving Spirit. We miss the gospel of Christ: the good news that, although the holy and all-powerful God knows we are dust, He still stoops to breathe into us the breath of life—to bring to our wounds the balm of acceptance and love. No other author has articulated this message more simply or beautifully than Brennan Manning.

I owe Brennan Manning thirty dollars, and I expect to get it to him soon. But I owe him an even bigger debt for the freedom he helped me find through this book . . . and the greatest debt of all to the God whose grace extends to—and especially for—the ragamuffins of this world.

The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning

A Word Before

The Ragamuffin Gospel was written with a specific reading audience in mind.

This book is not for the superspiritual.

It is not for muscular Christians who have made John Wayne, and not Jesus, their hero.

It is not for academics who would imprison Jesus in the ivory tower of exegesis.

It is not for noisy, feel-good folks who manipulate Christianity into a naked appeal to emotion.

It is not for hooded mystics who want magic in their religion.

It is not for Alleluia Christians who live only on the mountaintop and have never visited the valley of desolation. It is not for the fearless and tearless.

It is not for red-hot zealots who boast with the rich young ruler of the Gospels, “All these commandments I have kept from my youth.”

It is not for the complacent who hoist over their shoulders a tote bag of honors, diplomas, and good works, actually believing they have it made.

It is not for legalists who would rather surrender control of their souls to rules than run the risk of living in union with Jesus.

If anyone is still reading along, The Ragamuffin Gospel was written for the bedraggled, beat-up, and burnt-out.

It is for the sorely burdened who are still shifting the heavy suitcase from one hand to the other.

It is for the wobbly and weak-kneed who know they don’t have it all together and are too proud to accept the handout of amazing grace.

It is for inconsistent, unsteady disciples whose cheese is falling off their cracker.

It is for poor, weak, sinful men and women with hereditary faults and limited talents.

It is for earthen vessels who shuffle along on feet of clay.

It is for the bent and the bruised who feel that their lives are a grave disappointment to God.

It is for smart people who know they are stupid and honest disciples who admit they are scalawags.

The Ragamuffin Gospel is a book I wrote for myself and any- one who has grown weary and discouraged along the Way.

—Brennan Manning

Come As You Are

"God loves you as you are, not as you should be."

Brennan Manning

Sometimes I just like to sit and marvel at the true awesomeness of God and the simplicity of my faith based solely on His great love for me.  Have you ever doubted the love He has for you?  Do you wonder how God the Father could ever love you?  Why Jesus would go to such great lengths just to please His Father by dying on the cross for you?  If it had been only you?  I do. 

I say I know He loves me, and I can feel His Presence, and while that it is true, at the same time I just don't understand it.  But then in truth, who can?  To say you do makes you a liar.  He clearly says we see through a glass darkly.  Truth is, only in perfection can the truth be known.  And there is only one Perfect One.

I have been struggling for so long with things I know I need to do, things I know He wants me to do.  I often speak of my personal demons, because I am not afraid to let others know that I suffer, that I doubt, that I am broken, and that I am imperfect.  Sometimes I wish God would simply let me go home to be with him, but then that is somewhat selfish.  You see, I know He's not finished with me yet, and there's a good reason I am here in New Mexico for as long as He needs me here.  He has a plan, and His purpose has not had its perfect work in my life, not yet anyway.

Since my return to New Mexico I have time to reflect about a great many things, as He's been showing me things I haven't done yet, visions not yet come to pass.  While in Virginia I literally experienced the hounds of hell give it their best shot in trying to destroy me, but through prayers of  my brothers and sisters in Christ, God dispatched His warring angels to break me free from this demonic grasp. Sometimes it gets a bit scary as I think about the scope of the life I have set before me.  I'm not afraid.  No, never afraid, because I know He's right here with me as I stumble along my way.  He proved that to me so vividly recently that there's no denying He holds me in the palm of His hand.

I've loved Jesus all my life, and I am seeing He just how much he does love me.  As broken and helpless as I am He still wants to spend time with me and wrap His arms of love around me.  I can feel His strength, His power, His gentle touch, and see the twinkle in His eye as He looks at me.  To Him I am beautiful, and that is all that really matters to me. I hear my Father's laugh, and I know He is well pleased with me.

Have you ever loved someone so much that you actually ached if you were out of their sight for just a few moments?  That's how much Jesus loves us.  He can hardly wait until we wake up each morning, so He can he can spend the day with us again.  As He tucks us into bed each night, His voice sings "I'll see you in the morning, child."

I just spent a couple hours watching a movie, Ragamuffin, based on the life of Rich Mullins, a Christian artist and writer best known for the song "Awesome God".  I immediately had to call my younger son to tell him about the movie, as I saw glimpses of his life and mine in the essence of the message Rich brought through his music and his transparency about his life.  He wasn't afraid to tell the truth about his life, his struggles, his doubts. 

During his career he came to know Brennan Manning, a writer, priest who wrote The Ragamuffin Gospel, a book that touched my life when I read it years ago.  It's an old friend I run to remind me of

the love Jesus has for me.  I'm picking my old friend up again tonight, because I need a fresh reminder of my place in this world of Ragamuffins and Misfit Toys.  Rich asked Brennan once what he meant by the word "ragamuffins", to which Brennan says:  "the unsung assembly of saved sinners who are little in their own sight and aware of their brokenness and powerlessness before God."  I'm a ragamuffin, but I come humbly in all my need accepting the gift of grace as a little child.  It is all He asks.  It's all I need. It's all I've ever wanted.

Right now as I sit here sharing with you about his great love I know He's smiling, but He's waiting for me, so I'll close for now.  Watch the movie, read the book - you'll see it's not so hard.  You have nothing to lose, all to gain.  It will set you free.  I leave you with these thoughts:

“My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it.”
― Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel  

“When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes. I believe and I doubt, I hope and get discouraged, I love and I hate, I feel bad about feeling good, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. I am trusting and suspicious. I am honest and I still play games. Aristotle said I am a rational animal; I say I am an angel with an incredible capacity for beer.
To live by grace means to acknowledge my whole life story, the light side and the dark. In admitting my shadow side I learn who I am and what God's grace means. As Thomas Merton put it, "A saint is not someone who is good but who experiences the goodness of God."
The gospel of grace nullifies our adulation of televangelists, charismatic superstars, and local church heroes. It obliterates the two-class citizenship theory operative in many American churches. For grace proclaims the awesome truth that all is gift. All that is good is ours not by right but by the sheer bounty of a gracious God. While there is much we may have earned--our degree and our salary, our home and garden, a Miller Lite and a good night's sleep--all this is possible only because we have been given so much: life itself, eyes to see and hands to touch, a mind to shape ideas, and a heart to beat with love. We have been given God in our souls and Christ in our flesh. We have the power to believe where others deny, to hope where others despair, to love where others hurt. This and so much more is sheer gift; it is not reward for our faithfulness, our generous disposition, or our heroic life of prayer. Even our fidelity is a gift, "If we but turn to God," said St. Augustine, "that itself is a gift of God."
My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it.”
― Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel: Good News for the Bedraggled, Beat-Up, and Burnt Out