My thoughtful friend and sister in the Lord responded to my blog yesterday, Priorities, by sending me a note of encouragement. Sadly, the note was removed by someone once posted. Perhaps the words were too delicate for other ears, or perhaps she did not wish me to share it with my readers.
She knows I have been seeking my place in this world, a "home" - a place to belong.
There is a place where I can go and not feel alone.
A place of wonder,
beauty, laughter, acceptance and new beginnings.
A place where trust
and respect are not earned but granted freely.
Where I can go without
the guilt and shame of past regrets imprisoning me.
To a place where I
feel worthy, believed in, accepted for who I am,
capable of
accomplishing the impossible, helped when I am weak,
forgiven when I am
wrong. A place where I can forgive myself and others,
realizing we are
all fragile and capable of wrong thoughts and deeds,
but where we can
rise above anything on the wings of faith.
To begin again, to be made
brand new, with the strength of others,
who are just like me, just like
you. No longer alone, no longer excluded,
living together in harmony,
love and faith.
Where the impossible dreams become possibilities and
realities!
I am a misfit toy, a displaced person, a ragamuffin broken before God. This morning I crawled up into God's lap - for comfort, encouragement, but primarily to listen and find peace. Jesus warns us not to allow anyone or anything to steal our joy. I am keenly aware of my enemy and his often subtle tactics used to steal my joy. First of all, please hear me, joy is not the same as happiness. Joy is a part of the fruit of the Spirit, the person of the Trinity whose purpose is to comfort, be an advocate, and the one who reveals to us the truth of Jesus. The fruit of the Spirit is the character of Jesus Christ.
God wants us to clothe ourselves as representative of Christ:
He wants to equip us for ministry, for our life:
He wants to prepare and to ready us and protect us from the enemy's attacks on our entire being:
When Jesus prayed for his disciples prior to His death, he also prayed for us, His followers yet to come, those who believe He is who He says He is. God wants us to call Him Abba, which connotes the spiritual intimacy of the word we know as "daddy," which implies trust, protection, and blind faith. But, many times we feel God takes a stone deaf ear to our cries of distress - to our prayers, but I assure you He never does. He loves us with an everlasting love no man can fathom. His love defies reason, imagination - often it is misconstrued in our twisted minds where hatred, revenge, and seeking retribution are the only thoughts in our finite minds. But the answer to the questions is found in the deeply profound statement:
His response to debauchery is love poured out just-as-if we never sinned. Many have wondered why. Those who consider their lives as useless, lacking in purpose, lonely, hopeless and without love. Not worth the bother. But we are God's beloved ones, and He so wants us to know and experience the depth of His love. He wants us to turn deaf ears to the lies the enemy has filtered into our minds to imprison us and hold us captives. Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free.
Since my time of healing in Pagosa Springs the attacks on my mind have become more than daily. They are often moment by moment, but I am learning to discipline my mind once more and think with my heart, my gut, because I know my Abba Father loves me so much, has forgiven me for so many shortcomings, and satan cannot stand that knowledge. I am a warrior! Mighty in God, and satan knows he cannot steal my joy or my salvation.
As I pen these words I sense his loathing, but I do not fear him. He can kill my body, sometimes he can momentarily distract me from the truth, he can make the physical pain so severe it knocks me off my feet, but he can never steal my joy, and he can never take those whom God has entrusted to me.
And this is why I am suffering as I do.
Still I am not ashamed, for I
know
(perceive, have knowledge of, and am acquainted with)
Him Whom I
have believed
(adhered to and trusted in and relied on),
and I am
[positively] persuaded that He is able to guard
and keep that which has been entrusted to me
and which I have committed [to Him] until that day.
2 Timothy 1:12
The battle is the Lord's.
I have been angry, but I am learning to lay it down at His nail-scarred feet. Often the pain in my heart is so deep I feel I cannot take another step, but I take that step. I have learned another valuable lesson this weekend - I am able to continue doing the divine assignment with which He has called and equipped me for as long as He requires me, regardless of what another person does, no matter how lonely I become at times, and no matter how circumstances may change. My sufficiency is in Him alone. His love for me is an all-consuming fire. I want to do His will in my life, on earth as it is in heaven. How many people idly, didactically repeat the Lord's Prayer without truly understanding the meaning. How many partake of communion without fully understanding the true meaning it holds or the significance of Jesus' sacrifice or the warning not to eat or drink unworthily, without conscience. How many believe the income they earn, the possessions they hold so dear, not willing to share, saving for their retirement, belongs to them. Everything is His, and without Him we are nothing, I am nothing. He is the Author and Finisher of our faith. He is the true reward, and all possessions, everything we own, our very person belongs to Him for His glory and His use, His divine purpose through each one of us.
My life is not my own, and I willingly lay it down for Him. I willingly choose forgiveness, and I willingly lay down my life. Jesus, while teaching one day, was told that His mother and brothers were outside looking for Him. To which He responded:
Answering them, He said, "Who are My mother and My brothers?"
Looking about at those who were sitting around Him,
He said, "Behold My mother and My brothers!
"For whoever does the will of God,
he is My brother and sister and mother."
Mark 3:33-35
Yesterday I wrote that I wanted an unoffendable heart. Oh, how that statement sticks a burr in satan's butt, and yet I willingly choose to state it once more. I desire an unoffendable heart, Abba Father. And as I say it, write it, and pray for it even though satan is probably forming a new strategy to take me down. He knows my weaknesses, my vulnerabilities, but knowing me well he knows I may flinch or hurt a little or a lot, but in the strength of the Lord, I will not back down, and I will overcome.
I was a bit discouraged, unsettled about some things yesterday, but I had things to do, a mission to complete. Last night I shared with you my "lovely day." Although it indeed was a lovely day on so many levels, I never forgot for a moment the battle being fought in the heavenlies for my soul, for my life, and the countless ones, including animals, whose lives were in harm's way on that one day of the year. Not even in my momentary brokenness and extreme physical pain did I forget, and I stood with others as the unseen war was being fought. For as long as I am allowed to live I will stand for the lives, the minds, the hearts, the souls, for those who are most vulnerable to the lies and deceit, the cunning manipulation of the enemy. And, I am not lone in this stand. I am part of the 3-ply cord, that can never be unraveled. I am ready, I am equipped, and am stalwart in my faith. I am a survivor. I am an over-comer. I am His!
I know my purpose. I know my assignment, and I need your prayers. So suit up! in your armor, and please stand with me for your families, your nation, and your world. Lay down your doubts, fears, and inhibitions, and pick up your cross and your sword and follow Him. Today we fight! Today we stand! And no matter what happens, never doubt what God tells you in your heart, regardless of what you see with your eyes. Hold fast to your faith.
No comments:
Post a Comment