My Sweet Life

 

Sometimes I find myself seemingly at the opposite end of the spectrum, a contradiction in terms, and yet, isn't that how people view the Bible or see God? I often wonder where I'd be or who I'd be had I not listened to anyone's opinion about what I could or could not do or should or should not do. What if I had just lived my life? I am known as a "free spirit" in my small circle of friends, past the place of having anyone tell me how to live my life or lead me around on a leash. I have no entanglements, and am simply free to be "me." I find that refreshing. I'm not trying to be anyone particularly except who I am. Some think that being me is a good thing, or at least being the person I am is a good thing. Whatever I "am."

Okay, so what brought on this train of thought? I think it started yesterday while speaking with someone about what God could and could not do. As far as I feel about the subject God can do whatever He wants to do any way He wants to do it. He is not defined by any human laws or limited by circumstances, so anything is possible! I love that! He doesn't have to prove Himself to me, He already has!

This morning after coming home from church I started thinking about what I need to be doing along the lines of living out my faith and trusting God. He is after all a God of His Word, so I don't have to worry about being left in limbo. I'm just finding it hard to do what He asked without a bit more information. I seem to be spinning my wheels, going in circles, not making any real progress. So I am stuck!

This afternoon I am watching movies that make me think about things I want to do, places I want to see, people I want to meet. I am surrounding myself with positive vibes, and I love it! There's also a little sadness, but I think that goes along with life and living. It also helps me keep things in proper perspective. After all life isn't always perfect. In fact perfection is nearly impossible...there is just living! And yet, I do think there are glimpses of heaven, as God says we can have heaven on earth. It certainly is part of my way of praying.

So where do I go from here and now, and being in this moment? How do I do what I am being asked to do when I don't know how to begin? Just do it! That is what I have been doing, and as I review what I have written it seems like empty words. Same with my blogging abilities...sometimes they are reasonable, other times...well lacking in quality. Still I am doing it, and that is satisfying.

My weekly schedule is so hurried and complex that on weekends or my Wednesdays off all I want to do absolutely nothing except enjoy the days! The Italians call it " the sweetness of doing nothing." I learned that from one of my "feel good" movies! Still, it's the way I feel, and there are times I indulge myself in that sense of laziness. I have a habit of setting daily tasks to keep myself on track, however.
Sometimes the list is very short, other times I get carried away with expectations. Naturally I fail in accomplishing my set goals, so it is better to list a few things, adding on others if time or inclination allows. Yesterday I almost completed my list, but regardless I still feel happy for the success I made. I can walk safely in my bedroom now, as I picked up all the stacks of mail, magazines, DVDs, and other clutter from my floor. I washed all my laundry, and I changed my sheets. I had hopes of cleaning windows, but I dusted off my bedroom window and screen outside, so that is a step forward!

I heard it said one time, from another movie set in Italy, that it is important to take small steps daily, when repairing a home, or cleaning in my case, one room at a time and make it mine. That would be my bedroom, as I literally do everything in this room. It could be considered my prison, and it has in the past, but not now. I just love this room! I still have a way to go on completing my "spring cleaning" as I started late in the day, but the important thing is that I DID SOMETHING, and it felt good.

Tomorrow is Monday, and I will be traveling all day, so it will be busy, and more than likely I will be working late. Tuesday is a bit easier, and then comes WEDNESDAY, my day of doing absolutely zip squat if that is what I feel like doing. To interpret the words "zip squat," I mean doing nada! Not a blessed thing! A friend calls it "Linda Day," and I try to make it just that! I do have a few plans this week, but I intend to make a trip to Hobby Lobby where I plan to pick up some art supplies so I can begin another of my projects. I purchased some canvases awhile back, so I want to try my hand at painting again. I may even take a drawing class one Saturday. In fact I have decided that I am going to start doing some of the things on my "Bucket List" even though I don't really have anyone who'd be interested in doing the crazy things I want to do! But then that's okay! I am learning how to do things alone again, since my best friend moved back to El Paso. In fact sometimes doing things alone is preferable. For Mother's Day I treated myself to the movies, Captain America: Civil War, and it was GREAT! I ate a whole bucket of popcorn by myself! No Junior Mints this trip, but that is something to look forward to the next time!

I have eight months to accomplish some things, to make some changes in my life, before I make a HUGE change, the proverbial leap of faith! These are exciting times, and it is wonderful! I can hardly wait to see how God is going to make everything happen. All I have to do is what He told me to do, and I feel that I am on the way to doing it! At least I am making every attempt to be obedient, and since He knows my heart, that is all that matters. For today..."Il dolce far niente." The sweetness of doing nothing!