Day 124 Mysteries and Manna

5/4/2025

This has been an exciting day beginning with my two prayer meetings, followed by online church attendance at two churches, with meaty thought-provoking messages. During the day I caught up on some reading, and I finished my blog from yesterday. I needed to rethink it and finish my thoughts. It was longer, but that's the way it seems to go sometimes. I'm not sure if anything I say is noteworthy, but as I've said before, writing is an act of obedience. 

Tonight I attended another online service, and it brought the words from the Lord for the day full circle. The only thing is that I am a bit uncertain as to what I am supposed to share. I've had so many thoughts today, as well as some from a day or so ago. Each day is stocked with fresh manna, and try as I may, I just cannot get it all down on paper as I'd like. Much of what I learn, I don't think it is time to share, and that really doesn't help me, but I am learning that just because God opens my eyes to a word in scripture or encourages me in worship or in other ways, it doesn't mean it is time to share with others. I have many such visions or dreams that I am still mulling over in my mind. I attempted to share one dream with someone the other day, and I'm not sure it made any sense to her. In fact, I'm still trying to make sense of it myself.

Tonight in a short message given following a performance, I was challenged to rethink times in my life when I've felt confused about my calling. I wonder sometimes if I ever really heard God speak or, like Scrooge, it was a bit of bad potato I ate. I tried pulling out my old journals trying to find those times when God spoke to me, but I soon became overwhelmed with the stacks of journals going back to 1983. I used to write on notebook paper back then, so much of my notes and thoughts from the earlier years have been lost in all the moves I've had to do. Plus, I wonder sometimes whether it is wise to go back in history and try to re-piece my life. Besides, my memory is quite good when it comes to certain words from the Lord. The years I spent in isolation, the dry seasons, the valleys, were many. Like I said, I moved a lot over the years. 

I asked my son if he had his life to do over again, if he'd want to do the same things, make the same mistakes. His response was "Yes." He shared that because of the mistakes, he had become the man he is today. Since I moved here almost four years and bought my parents' home, he has healed, and he's getting his life back together. I told him, I would never want to relive my life, but I too am grateful for the person I have become because of the journey and trials. He finally understood that I only wanted his life, and the livws of his sister and brother, to be happier, without sickness and pain. I have never quite understood why God would allow me to miraculously conceive and carry three children, only to have them endure the pain and isolation of each of their lives. I raised them to love the Lord, and they seemed to enjoy being part of the community of believers. If I made a mistake during their younger years, I was quick to ask forgiveness and admit I was wrong. I tried to protect them, but I couldn't even protect myself. Nonetheless, I did my best, and I pray that they each feel the same way. When children grow up, sadly they don't always choose wisely, but then, neither do we. I'm just glad that my life is better now, and it is my prayer that theirs will soon turn around for better.

I remember a plaque my brother put together in Vacation Bible School, and I still have it. The words written on it say: "Only one life will soon be past; only what's done for Christ will last." These are timely words for today and for life. Keeping our focus on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter or Finisher of our faith is the key to success. God never said He wanted us to have a happy life, He wanted us to walk in an obedient life. Psalm 37:3-6 says:

 

³ Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
⁴ Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

⁵ Commit your way to the Lord,
Trust also in Him,
And He shall bring it to pass.
⁶ He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
And your justice as the noonday.

 

Many people have quoted verse 4 wrongly by saying that God wants to give us the desires of our hearts, but that's not exactly so. The verse tells us to delight ourselves in the Lord, meaning submitting ourselves to Him and following His ways, then God will give us the desires of our heart, because our desire when we commit our ways to His will eventually become our desire, because we love Him, and we have made Him the desire of our hearts. Makes good sense!

As I close out my day, God has given me a verse from Jeremiah to chew on and spend a little "Selah" time: "Therefore thus says the LORD: 'If you return, then I will bring you back; you shall stand before Me; if you take out the precious from the vile, you shall be as My mouth. Let them return to you, but you must not return to them.'" Jeremiah 15:19

I think I have my study time cut out for me to understand that one and another thought God gave me about finding my Cherith Brook referring to the scriptures found in 1 Kings 17:2-4. So, it seems I have two mysteries to solve. Until then, find your "selah moment" and wait before the Lord. He may have fresh manna hidden for you in scripture!