Day 133 Deep in Thought

 

5/13/2025

 

It's been raining off and on all day, and tonight in the quietness, I can hear the gentle drops slowly increasing into a vigorous downpour disturbing the calm. It's late, and I am still awake, writing, but I really don't know where to begin. The day was another of mixed emotions, and I didn't get outdoors to get my weeding done because of the rain. I had plenty I could do inside, but thoughts clouded my perceptions, so I remained someone sedentary, deep in thought. I received some difficult news again today, and I haven't had time to process it or talk about it, except to cry out to Abba. Once again and all too soon, I am reminded of the brevity of life. At the same time I am ecstatic with joy in the release of another hostage from the stronghold of Hamas. Edan looks well in appearance, but like the others who are home, he will have to overcome the trauma of so many months underground, in the dark, chained, starved, and tortured. Again, we wait for the remainder of the hostages to come home, no longer pawns in the hands of evil men. 

I picked up my Bible and read the following: "Unexpected blessings are wonderful, unexpected trials are often bitter pills to swallow. But God can use even unexpected trials to bring unexpected blessings, if you're ready for them" The phrase "But God" is seen so many times in scriptures, as He allows things to happen so man can identify His hand in the circumstances, for good or for bad. Regardless of what happens in life, He promises never to leave us or forsake us. Many times, when we encounter the unexpected and have to endure what seems impossible to us, it may not feel as if God cares or is even present. The loneliness and feelings of abandonment are so overwhelming, the enemy's voices in our head  attempting to discredit the God we love become so loud and unyielding. But if we allow Him to quiet our hearts, we are able to drive these evil thoughts from our minds and look to Jesus. 

In Psalm 139:7-12 we can glimpse the truth of His words, His promise to be with us, the One who created us:  "Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me. If I say, 'Surely the darkness shall fall on me,' even the night shall be light about me. Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You, but the night shines as the day; the darkness and the light are both alike to You."

Something else happened today that encouraged me, and it gave me confidence in what I believed to be true, even when others tended to see only distortions, and they failed to hope. The things that people say often appear to mean the very opposite of what is truly in their hearts, cleverly disguised and understandable only to the one who truly sees beyond the words. Somewhat like the parables Jesus was so fond of using. We cannot rely on feelings; we must turn to the Word of God and stand upon the truth. The days will become harder, so we must be alert and cautious in our words. The world is poised to see what happens next amidst the distractions that increase by day. 

O how I would love a simple life, one where I can sit on my front porch and watch the sun go down behind the mountains, and watch the animals drinking from the stream that flows beyond the path that leads into the forest. Smoke would rise from my chimney as the snow gently begins to fall. My border collies would be romping through the woods trying to outsmart our resident jackrabbit, who's much faster and wiser than Rascal and Lady. O how I miss my gals. I loved them so. Kenya gave me joy each time she'd skip over from next door and dance with me and play. Memories.

The rain has stopped, and I'm tired. Time for bed, and I'll pick up where I left off tomorrow. May the Lord bless you and keep you. Goodnight.