6/24/2025
"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds
are steadfast, because they trust in you."
Isaiah 26:3
These past two days have been rather tense, and my "irritation quotient" nearing implosion rate. It seems as if my spirit, my inner being, has been heightened, and my spiritual eyes have been allowed to "see" or "discern" more than my human heart can bear. I don't know if that is an accurate description of how I am feeling or not. To say that I am emotionally disturbed by what I see and sense may be a better explanation, but then, I imagine whoever reads this may wonder "what is she saying!" The words of this song, Be Magnified by Randy Rothwell, may help:
As I began writing, this song began to play; it's as if God wanted to make sure my thoughts and feelings were being properly conveyed. Music helps me express my emotions when my own words often fall short. When I try to talk to my son about what I am sensing, I appear overly concerned about the human condition, something that has deeply bothered him for years giving way to deep inner conflict. So, I should know better than to burden him with things that only add to his problems. My first inclination is that in seeing what I see, the problem must be my own, that I am being overly critical or judgmental, so I repent once more, sinner that I am. Then I snap out of that feeling, as I am not going down that rabbit hole any more. I recognize the spiritual attack. No, this is part of what I have been allowed to see for a reason. Still, repentance is never not needed, as I never want to think I know more than I do, because I don't. That is the problem I am sensing with others.
The verse above, "I have leaned on the wisdom of men," is the focus. I have written about this in so many ways, some more directly than others, but it seems as if the words of Jesus are always before me:
"And the LORD said to me, 'The prophets prophesy lies in My name.
I have not sent them, commanded them, nor spoken to them;
they prophesy to you a false vision, divination, a worthless thing,
and the deceit of their heart."
Jeremiah 14:14
All my life I have observed others and intently watched how emotions, fear being the greatest one, work in the hearts of man (inclusive) to not rely on the words and counsel of God, rather they must run to a person for a word from the Lord. Jesus spoke about this in His teachings. I am watching as groups of people develop into a movement, then the movement grows larger than life, except when discernment comes in, otherwise that group may splinter into another group, eventually growing into another movement, another camp of seemingly spiritual wherewithal. It becomes so nauseating to watch and scary, especially among those professing belief in Christ. I have become so skeptical of people who demand respect and acclaim because of academic achievements. Does a person's credibility become more profound based on "post-nominal letters" than on their relationship with the Almighty God, for whom they say they speak? So, as the lowly one with on a BS attached to my name (note the pun), I admit my confusion and dismay.
So here I am today, rethinking over recent developments. It is also disconcerting to me to consider how one moment in time someone is hailed for their decision to save the planet from certain, eventual nuclear destruction, or on a smaller scheme, the country of Israel and the larger nation of the United States of America (notice the emphasis on the latter to note our home), to do an about face and have the news media, and even Christians who think they can read facial expressions, begin to rip the man to shreds! I don't understand. Maybe my lack of education prevents me from it?! Regardless, respect should be shown. If the man who was cursed, because of another's frustration and obvious fatigue (and who wouldn't be?!), can accept regret for those hastily spoken words and give forgiveness, who are we, all sinners, to complain?! Even in the church - who made us God that we think we can give our opinions so freely or say, "Thus saith the Lord?" I think God expressed the same sentiment in Jeremiah, and then again in Ezekiel.
When I witness all that I am seeing on a national level, especially in churches, it brings me to my knees and to literal tears of repentance and great sadness. When David repented of his sins, God said that He looked for someone with a broken and contrite heart and a broken spirit, this meant that David realized he did not deserve God's mercy. I know I don't deserve His mercy or grace, and I will never forget the day I looked into Jesus's face, hanging on that cross for me. We change, because you can never erase the vision from your eyes. Not as a torment, because I am forgiven, but from a keen awareness of where I would be except by the grace of God. Then I'd miss seeing the altogether lovely One who gave His life for me, so I could have relationship with God in this life and in the next.
I think this is a better way to spend my days.
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