Running Free

Sometimes as we walk this earth we encounter people who are...different, seemingly not of this world.  They are not bothered by what transpires around them, content only to be involved in their duty of the day or the work at hand.  Never complaining, always smiling, seldom speaking, yet when they do utter a sound the voice has a softness, an other-worldly, ethereal quality about it. There's something about them that you just cannot express in words...different...better almost.

I remember when I first moved to New Mexico in 1987 working in our Hallmark Shop in Las Vegas, there were days I'd be singing as I worked, merchandizing gifts to give it a "homey" quality, as I believe people like to see how a thing of beauty can be displayed in a home.  Many people would stop to talk to me, and I was so overwhelmed with the joy of the Lord that I "glowed" as I spoke cheerily, or so I was told. It was said I had an "aura" around me, but I knew it was Him. A few years ago while in the home of a person I was meeting for the first time, in Las Vegas again, I was told "no one talks like you do! You're not from around here, are you?"  Even not so long ago while visiting yet another person I was told I was described as "always encouraging," and I pray that this is true of the person I am, as I know it is the person I am called to be.  The people we are all called to be.  

My friend, recently returned from training for a new job, and she mentioned meeting a lady whom she described as "different", "something about her".  I became distracted after that, as my mind began to wander, thinking back over the person I used to be, the one I always want to be. I began to wonder what people thought when they met me for the first time. These days I am not always happy with feelings that come over me, or the words I think or possibly allow to slip from my tongue.  I will always advocate for honesty, truth, and helping the one in need, the cause uncured, or for what is right and good.  But I want to do so in the way I feel so deeply within my soul, from the far reaches of the great beyond where all truth and beauty begin.  I want to find myself again, the young dreamer who has met her One True Love, and who responds in kind to all mankind, no matter the winds of change or the turning tides of life.  I want to be "different".  I want to be known as His, without a word spoken, light upon my face, and His love shining forth in my smile, touching hearts!

Returning to Virginia is always less than easy for me, because returning brings back memories, not all good, most bittersweet.  Seeing friends from high school days when life was freer in some respects, and yet under the surface, not easy at all, just hidden away to enjoy the present moment.  I know at least one of you who understands that feeling.

While "home" away from the place I call home now where I feel "safe and sheltered," although for only a few days, I want to experience a lifetime of fresh awakenings.  I need to remember and lay at rest some disturbing "ghosts" that haunt my soul, and I want to face a few fears that have long kept me running from dreams or what "could be."  Mostly, I need rest, a time to think about  future plans, yet enjoy the days with friends and family, running free for the time I am there!

I also want to write daily entries into my blog noting what I am "seeing," perhaps for the first time, or in a long time!  I want to laugh, sing, shout, run and play!  Basically, I desire to truly have a restful time away from my hurried life here in New Mexico where I can discover who Linda is again!  Better still, I want to return home...better...different!  

So for those of you who want to see me, who want to share time with an old friend, a cousin, a niece, a sister, a mother, or a new found chum...let me hear from you!  I'll be waiting...expectantly!