"That is God's call to us - simply to be people
who are content to live close to Him and
to renew the kind of life in which the closeness
is felt and experienced.
Thomas Merton
Getting over insults is often hard. People assume things, have a difficult day, or simply do not understand the choices one makes in life, then the words come, the arrows of satan, and we are left injured and alone. Jesus speaks of persecution and the correct response, and I try to obey. His are the only ones I care to follow. Even that is a great misunderstanding, and again, the words come.
Listening to portions of the story of Mother Teresa is like listening to my heart cry. There is an emptiness inside of me that cannot be filled unless I am doing the will of God. If she were alive she would know what it is that is so difficult for mere words to express. Yet she states it simply,
“Hearts to love and hands to serve!”
(Mother Teresa)
(Mother Teresa)
Her focus,
"The hungry, the naked, the homeless, the crippled, the blind, the
lepers, all those people who feel unwanted, unloved, uncared for
throughout society, people that have become a burden to the society and
are shunned by everyone." --- Mother Teresa
I am not Mother Teresa, but I too feel the pain of others. All I want is to be His hands and feet. For decades, prior to her beginning Missionaries of Charity in Calcutta, she experienced a emptiness, a longing deep within her soul. I know the ache of wanting to help those who feel they have no hope, even here. Yesterday I heard someone say, "if I could just get that one back month on my mortgage paid, I could relax a bit." This comes from someone who has worked her entire life, taken care of others and her parents, gone without so others could have what they needed. Now she needs help. Whenever it is within our ability to help another, we need to do it. I need to do it.
No one wants to be alone, but sometimes that is where God places you, even if for a season. I think this is where He wants me, with my focus, my total dependence on Him. Scripture says "He sets the lonely in families...." Psalms 66:6 He has placed me among people who not only love me but who look forward to my visiting. Monday, on a day I was so discouraged, feeling alone, I set out on my busy day, smile on my face. How can one not smile when driving around the area in which I live. The colors so vibrant, even in rain and mud, sleet and snow, it is a slice of heaven.
First stop, Ojo Caliente, a friend I have known for many, many years was my first stop. As I was leaving she hugged me and said, "I always love it when you come!" This was after sharing some pretty serious realities, yet throughout the visit we reminisced about her mother who has now passed, we cried about her concerns, and we giggled and outright laughed over silly things. I felt such love in her warm embrace.
Next stop was way, way to the end of the earth almost, as I spiraled down a maze of roads deep in the mountains of Coyote. I was once again welcomed with hugs, laughter, sharing the love of Christ, and for some reason as I was leaving, knowing I had a long, busy day, she said "Don't give up! We're on the verge of a miracle!" Maybe it was God's words to me, as although we shared much about Jesus and the affect He has on our lives, she did not know those words came from a song written by Rich Mullins, "Verge of a Miracle," that he wrote in response to a young boy sharing his hurts, broken life, attempted suicide with him at a retreat. How like God - out of the blue He has someone tell me she was reminded of that song. Let me share them with you,
"Verge of a Miracle"
by Rich Mullins
Clung to a ball
That was hung in the sky
Hurled into orbit
There You are
Whether you fall down
Or whether you fly
Seems you can never get too far
Someone's waiting to put wings
Upon your flightless heart
You're on the verge of a miracle
Standing there
Oh you're on the verge of a miracle
Just waiting to be believed in
Open your eyes and see
You're on the verge of a miracle
Here in your room
Where nobody can see
Voices are loud
But seldom clear
But beneath the confusion
That's running so deep
There is a promise you must hear
The love that seems so far away
Is standing very near
You're on the verge of a miracle
Standing there
Oh you're on the verge of a miracle
Just waiting to be believed in
Open your eyes and see
When you've played out
Your last chance
And your directions
Have all been lost
When the roads that you look down
Are all dead ends
Look up
You could see if you'd just look up
You're on the verge of a miracle
Standing there
Oh you're on the verge of a miracle
Just waiting to be believed in
Open your eyes and see
You're on the verge of a miracle
In the midst of my discouragement I receive encouragement from people I am sent to encourage, yet their courage strengthens me. And although I do encourage them, in ways they do not understand, they touch my soul. How wonderful is that! I give, and it is returned to me, pressed down, running over and over. That is how God rolls!
My final step of Monday's journey took me to Youngsville to the home of a young man whom I've known for years. He shared his hopes and dreams, and I felt like a proud parent! Again, glory given to God, the author of our hopes and dreams. This young man shared with me openly his failures and his great victories. As I left he spoke again, saying that although he had been anxious about his health, he wasn't anxious that day, because he knew I was coming, "a breath of fresh air!" That really made my day. I'm a breath of fresh air to someone! Imagine that! I can only pray, and I thank Jesus, because He is my breath of fresh air, the very air I breathe.
On the way home it began to rain furiously for a short distance, but as it slowed, I crested the hill to see a rainbow across the vast, open sky. Heaven speaks so loudly at times! Today in writing this blog I was so depressed, down-trodden, not knowing what to do, but in sharing the love of God and of those who touch my life, a smile comes across my face, and I know...I can do this...I am on the verge of a miracle!
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