Day 38 Don't Look Back!

 

2/7/2026

"Why do you cry to Me? Tell the children

of Israel to go forward."

Exodus 14:15  

It's Saturday, the Sabbath day of rest and relaxation, and I feel as if I have completely run out of gas, and my engine is shutting down! It's so cold this morning, and I've had another restless night. But, when I opened my eyes, breathed in my first deep breath of air, I decided not to waste time lounging, instead I'd grab a cup of coffee and settle into a quiet time before I eased myself into a new day. Last night I listened as Joshua Aaron read the scriptures for the today's message, so for once I didn't have to rush to finish reading before service began. I may be a little sleepy, but I knew it'd be a good day.

Refreshed from a cup of hot, steamy hazelnut coffee and a big bowl of oatmeal loaded with raisins and dried cherries, sprinkled with cinnamon, I felt ready to meet the day. The music was softly playing, and the words "Great is Thy faithfulness" graced my ears. I love the old hymns, and this one has a special place in my heart. It seemed appropriate considering how I'd started the day in total weariness, but now I was revived and ready to focus on the message of the day.

This week our Torah reading was based on Exodus 18 when Moses' father-in-law Jethro came for a visit to bring Moses' wife and son to meet him on the journey. Bill decided to back track to last week's Torah portion beginning in Exodus 13 at the Red Sea moment in the lives of the children of Israel. Moses is trying to settle the people down, as they appear to have reached a dead end, and the army of Pharaoh was hot on their heels. But God...! God had already alerted Moses, letting him know that He had caused Pharaoh to chase after them so that He could show them once and for all that He is God! Why is it that when we launch out into the deep, faith in tact, fully trusting God, that the moment something unexpected or uncomfortable happens, we want to retreat?! That's the way it happened with the people at the Red Sea. The people were grumbling that it would have been better to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness. Moses responded: "The LORD will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace." The LORD is hearing all this, so He responds to Moses:

"And the LORD said to Moses, 'Why do you cry to Me? Tell the children of Israel to go forward. But lift up your rod, and stretch out your hand over the sea and divide it. And the children of Israel shall go on dry ground through the midst of the sea."

Once more the LORD has to remind Moses of what he has in his hand - the rod or shepherd's staff. So Moses does what God says to do, and the seas part, the winds blow, and the people cross over safely, while the cloud of God's covering blinds the eyes of Pharaoh's army and holds them back. We know the end of that story, but not long after this miracle, the people will find something else to complain about, and on it goes. Our human nature says, "Won't they every learn?!" Yet are we any different, really? I know in my own life God has had to remind me to trust Him! I'm at one of those moments right now, in fact!

When unexpected things happen in our lives we begin to question and ask why? For me, I have often wondered over these four years if things were happening to me, because, once again, I did something out of His timing. But I know that's not true. But there are times that I want to go back, return to New Mexico where I had friends, a church, and I was comfortable. If something went wrong, I'd take care of it alone. I was used to that. Now, I have my son to consider, and I wonder about how things would be if he wasn't here. Prior to moving back I was alone for twenty years, but in truth I'd been alone most of my life. The point is that I was comfortable being alone, but things began to change after my daddy died, and I wondered if it was time to go home. So here I am. Things have been different, and although I enjoy the time spent with my son, it hasn't been easy. But then, following Jesus was never promised to be without challenges. 

I've been asking Abba to show me what I needed to see or understand in order to go forward instead of looking back. Why do I always think that I've done something wrong? or not heard God speak? The answer to that is probably because of my failures in life. Like the children of Israel I had launched out in boldness, courage, and self-confidence that I had not experienced in years. I always presented myself with a pseudo-self confidence, but deep down I would always questions myself. Old habits are hard to break, I guess. But here, I've had self-confidence, and it even became something I was proud about. After all, God had given me a great job, and I'd earned enough money to buy this house, paying my brother and sister their portion without having to take out a mortgage. I owned a very nice car, another gift from the Lord, and although I wasn't well off by any stretch of the imagination, my needs were met, with a little besides. I realized, as I always have, that everything belongs to God anyway, and He more than provides for my needs. We'd weathered problems with the furnace and other routine maintenance issues successfully, and we were able to go out for a meal at our favorite little restaurant just up the road once a month. We managed to sock up a little money towards a rainy day, and God was taking care of us. But I do admit that during all this I'd begin to compare myself with others and wonder what if something went wrong, what would I do? It's one thing to say I trust God, but do I really trust God?! So He decided to put me to the test to see if I'd continue forward trusting Him or want to run away. Then He made certain that I couldn't run away. It probably isn't that cut and dry, but it seemed to me to look and feel that way.

So, here I am. God provided for us to be able to put on a new roof at a wonderful price, but we had something happen we were not expecting. The car accident in early December, before Christmas. Since that happened I've been stuck. It took a month to hear anything about the car and settle things, followed by the news that my daddy's car was not able to be repaired. January brought more snow and bitter cold. Now it's February, and we haven't been able to look around very much, but thanks to the kindness of my sister and a couple of friends, we've managed to go to the grocery store and run errands. Now I realize that things could be a lot worse, but little things have become big things for me. I felt unsupported in the church I had been attending, When additional concerns surfaced regarding health issues, but my sister's kind pastor offered support. Some things have evened out, but other things have to be considered. It's never an easy ride. So here I am. Caught between the rock and a hard place. 

Today, however, I feel that I am beginning to understand what God has been trying to show me about myself, things I needed to settle within myself. Things I needed to change. And although it has been terribly humbling, these are things I have been wrestling with for some time, and I finally have more self-acceptance, because I'm not the only one God is speaking to about letting things go. We are called to surrender all to Jesus, put God first in our lives, before family, friends, anyone or anything. Pretty much this has been my life, and I've faced much criticism about it, and it has caused controversy within myself at times. I don't know where the journey will go tomorrow, but I do know there's much more I have to learn, and more areas that need straightening out. I'm willing to do whatever I need to do in order to finish the race set before me. So, I guess I'll see what tomorrow brings. 

Day 36 Things to Do

 

2/5/2026

 "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want."

Psalm 23:1

 

Where do I begin? Today was a very good day, and I was in a good mood, but then that is how I generally am - mood wise, that is. Lately, I've been concerned about some things, but whatever is going on, I seem to take most things in stride. And believe me, much has been going on of late, but regardless, I am determined to figure things out, with God's help. Today was one of those days. My sister has been so kind to me by helping me with grocery shopping, doctor's visits, and today with shopping for a new car. We headed out mid morning, and we spent the better part of the afternoon checking out possibilities. We had our eye on a great deal, but the test drive revealed a probable transmission problem. Fortunately, I have a great feel for idiosyncrasies, and my son, who's a mechanic, confirmed my suspicions. Very disappointing, but at least we have a good feel and understanding of cars. Our next possibility proved to be a much better car, with a great warranty, but it would require taking out a loan, and I'm not so certain that I want to do that. I'm never one to make decisions quickly or easily, as I like to consider my options. I imagine that's a good character trait, plus the Bible says to owe no man anything but to love one another. But then, there are times in life where we have to pay as we go. The experience was very enlightening as we learned how these car deals are put together from the young man assisting us. In fact he kept mentioning his mother, who it appeared is a God-fearing woman and who has obviously instructed her son well in God's laws and in kindness. I look forward to visiting with this young man again, as it would be great to give him our business. The dealership certainly found a great employee with a great understanding of customer service. I've never been "yes ma'am-ed" so much in one day, but it was nice.

Once home I had to finish getting ready for my evening Bible study, so I didn't have much time to think about the day. My son had been looking online for days checking out used cars. We never realized how many car dealers there were in the area. I imagine I got so used to living in small towns in New Mexico that I never considered how many places there were here. But then, moving back here after so many years has really been an eye-opener for me. A lot changes in thirty-five years! 

Bible study went well, and we have another new and welcomed addition to our ladies' group. Sometimes that makes me a bit timid, as I never know the personality of a new person, but I always manage to muddle through. We've been studying the gospel of Luke, and tonight the discussion was about Jesus' choosing the twelve disciples. I like to refer to the series The Chosen when considering personalities in Jesus' circle and those he encountered. Although the series embellishes somewhat, which is typical for television shows, I feel that Dallas has done a great job in capturing the character of the disciples by the scriptural descriptions and what's not said in scriptures but is implied in the culture. At any rate it's fun to think about why Jesus made the choices He did when gathering His followers. When the Pharisees and other religious leaders complained to Jesus about the company He kept, Jesus told them that he did not come to call the righteous to repentance but sinners. I don't think they every fully grasped what He was trying to tell them, as they squabbled quite a bit about the people Jesus preferred to spend His time with. We had a great discussion, and the even went by quickly. 

Tomorrow is another day, but I'm not planning on leaving the home, rather I have things to attend to right here. My cat, Alex, got pretty confused about my not being home all day, but once we returned, he soon came scratching at the door. He's getting pretty spoiled and has taken nicely to staying inside on these extremely cold days. He loves to sleep all day on my bed, and I'm getting used to having the mischievous fellow around. Next week we'll try the search again for the car, but I am still holding out for a miracle, and no one has been able to talk me out of that possibility. God moves in mysterious ways, and I need some of those right now. Until then, I'll be patient and keep my eyes on Him.  

Day 35 Eyes to Heaven

 

2/4/2026 

"The effective, fervent prayer of a  righteous

man avails much."

James 5:16

 

My day began super early this morning, after a difficult night of sleep. Whenever there's something special happening the next day, it seems as if I have difficulty getting to bed as early as I'd prefer. Still, God always graces me with the tenacity I require for special times and gatherings. This morning was the National Gathering for Prayer and Repentance hosted by Tony Perkins at the Family Research Council and Jim Garlow at Well Versed. The gathering included several members of Congress representing their States as well as pastors and other Christian ministry leaders and special guests praying on behalf of their States. The gathering was for the purpose of coming before a Holy God in repentance and humility to intercede on behalf of our nation and world in the hope of revival and reformation that is so needed in our nation. It was a blessed time of worship and seeking God's guidance and wisdom for our leaders in each branch of government and for our churches. Right now our nation is in such chaos, perpetrated by spiritual forces at work in this world. We are in a spiritual battle that is being played out in our city streets and in countries around the world. It is time to seek God's face in repentance and deep humility as we desperately call out to Him for wisdom and healing. It is time that the church at large awakens from its slumber or apathy or indifference and return to their first love as mentioned in the book of Revelation. Time is short, and the hour is late.

I hope that anyone who reads this blog will pass along the information to everyone. I won't belabor the point, because I talk about this all the time. My heart is so passionate about seeing the church being the church that God created her to be, the Bride of Christ awaiting the return of her King, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. There must be a return to our Hebraic roots as the Bible was written for the Jewish people, by the Jewish people, God's Chosen People, and God, in His mercy and great love, through the shed blood of Jesus Christ, allowed the Gentiles to be grafted into the vine. The part we play is clearly written in Romans 11, in order to bring Israel to the truth of Messiah and His imminent return. I still don't understand how so many followers of Christ could have missed the story, but they did and are still blinded by the enemy regarding the prophetic destiny of Israel. It is my prayer that they will open their hearts and minds to truth according to God's Word, the whole counsel of His Word. I'm sure my words will be offensive to many who think that their theological degrees have made them an expert on the Bible, but if they are teaching Replacement Theology, they are in grave error. If they are turning their backs on Israel and do not understand the significance of what is going on today right before our eyes, they are in grave error. It is not time for pride and arrogance, but a time of repentance and humility. It is a time to seek the Lord while He may be found.

Day 34 Sheltered

 

2/3/2026

"You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me

from trouble; You shall surround me with

songs of deliverance."

Psalm 32:7

 

Did I ever mention that I adore teddy bears, and if I were a teddy bear, then this little one may be me. Most people don't know much about my interests or even how I used to earn a living. But then, that would require a lot of explaining, as I've been all over the place in my life's adventures. But concerning teddy bears.... The first teddy bear I can recall is the one I got from my Great-uncle Pete from Alexandria. As I recall we went to a carnival or fair, and he won a big pink and white bear for me. Back then it was easier to actually win prizes. I remember seeing a photo of me in a frilly dress with my hair combed and curled, and it was long, not in pigtails, as I normally wore. I was holding the bear, but I wasn't smiling. Maybe it was because I was gussied up, and that was not who I was at any age. Still, I remember my Uncle Pete, and I know that he loved to spoil me. I also remember listening to classical music in his basement, and when he died, Aunt Nannie gave me the vinyl records, a set by RCA. Sadly, someone borrowed them along with other treasured records, but the memories remain to this day. There were many more, as Uncle Pete and Aunt Nannie loved to travel, and they collected salt and pepper shakers wherever they visited. Pete and Nannie were very special to me, a shelter in the storm, another hiding place like my grandparents. They always seemed to make time for me. I miss them both. Uncle Pete died while they were traveling, as I recall. They were at a restaurant eating, and he just collapsed over on the table. I may not have the story exactly right, but I do know he was in the restaurant. That was traumatic for Aunt Nannie as one may well expect. Aunt Nannie spent a lot of time visiting my parents. She and my mother were very close. My old bedroom came to know was "Nannie's Room." Her bed is now in the attic, replaced by my queen sized bed, but the only occupants of that room are "stuffed." I've remained in my mama's little room she used when she became too ill to sleep in her bed. There are a lot of memories in this old house. 

I've often spoken about my love for soft, squishy plush animals. In my room, mama's room, I am surrounded by memories leaving little space on the dresser or table top, but it's my happy place, for lack of a better name. On the dresser sits Winnie the Pooh, Eeyore, Snoopy and Woodstock who enjoy watching old movies with me. There's also a Precious Moments teddy bear I call "Barely" given to me by my husband of 25 years, and a little dog, Spike. They're best friends. I have two keepsakes from my Grammy - Susie, a little rag doll with pink yarn hair and blue eyes made from an old flour sack. I embroidered one eye, and she the other. Mine was not well done, but I was only about eight, I believe, perhaps younger. Grammy was always teaching me how to make arts and crafts from things we found around the house. Money was scarce, but imagination was plentiful! I also have a bear she knitted for my younger son, Daniel, who lives with me. The bear's name is Fire. I think he named it that, because he has a burnt orange-red sweater knitted on. Both Susie and Fire have seen some years, but they're still holding on. Many other friends are long gone, others are safely tucked away in the attic. All special, all beloved memories.

So why am I telling you about my "toys" and childhood? I dunno, maybe I needed to let someone know about things that matter to me. I'm always interested in what matters to others. Perhaps that's why I was so good at teaching children or even successful with case management. People need to feel valued and "seen." It's especially important when working with children. There's a reason kids act out in school or church. They know they'll get the attention they seek. Howbeit not in a positive way, but it does get attention for a brief time at least. Sad that children feel they need to resort to such tactics. But if we look a little more closely at the adult who has been "labeled" as socially disruptive or mentally ill, could this behavior result from similar unresolved childhood issues or feelings? In my crazy self-made, protective world, I've learned that people of all ages respond to play therapy. It may sound immature and juvenile, but try it, and you'll see. That's why puppetry is a wonderful tool for teaching at-risk kids. Behind a stage they can freely express themselves without the negative feelings they attach to themselves. By "acting out" in a playful manner, it eventually leads to a more honest evaluation of the inner turmoil, or so I've discovered. 

I'm even learning that singing worship songs softly around my semi-feral cat, Alex, who is finicky one minute and quite taken with sleeping quietly on my bed all day the next, gets closer to me when I'm singing. Right now he's moved a little away, but he's still resting on my Bible. Not a bad place to lay his head, eh?! Perhaps I'll come up with some new ideas for a sideline job, as I've been thinking about going back to work to earn a few dollars, so I can build back up my savings. Rainy days seem to come more often it seems, and my efforts to get the story written are all backed up in my blogs, so publishing the book may take a bit more time. Anyone who follows me knows that I have much on my mind, so these journeys down memory lane made prove helpful in some odd way. To show I'm human and have thoughts perhaps. Time will tell, I suppose, but time is passing quickly, and I'm drawing closer to the end of days, or so I've been told lately, in a playful manner.

Time always seem to fly by when I'm mulling over my thoughts, trying to put them down on paper. I guess in the long run it doesn't matter much what I say. But one never knows. So for now, I'll clear my bed of others friends, and prepare myself for bed. Tomorrow's a busy day, so I have to be wide awake. Until the next day, I hope whoever reads this yarn finds something noteworthy to consider. Night!

Day 33 Six More Weeks of Winter!

 

2/2/2026

 "Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good;

blessed is the man who trusts in Him!"

Psalm 34:8

 

It seems as if Punxsutawney Phil, the groundhog meteorologist from Pennsylvania and Buckeye Chuck from Ohio are in agreement - six more weeks of winter! Poor little guy, even he is dreaming about spring and planting, or perhaps he's considering that if his prediction is wrong, he may have to get busy, forfeiting those extra hours of sleep. Who knows what runs through the little critter's mind?! Regardless, we have six more weeks to hope snow is not in the forecast and the weather warms up a tad.

Today was a productive day of shoveling ice and snow. It went a little better today, as when I stuck the regular shovel at the edge, then lifted it, a huge chunk of ice and snow released, so I was able to work a little faster and more efficiently. Only problem was that my fingers and feet were freezing in a very short time, plus my arms were getting tired and sore. Also, since I lift with my legs and not my back, squatting made my already tender backsides (the result of three different falls) a bit worse for the wear. I guess my age is finally catching up with me! I never had this problems while I was in Northern New Mexico, but then I was four years younger, and the snows were dryer. In Virginia the humidity even affects the snow. I never got so cold in New Mexico either, and I spent a much longer time shoveling. It was fun back then when Kenya, the neighbor's Malamute would come to help me. Dancing in the snow with a big dog can be intimidating, but it can also be a lot of fun. She's in doggie heaven now, though, but I've no doubt she's frolicking in Heaven's version of snow. Maybe chasing clouds or just romping and stomping with the little children where Heaven has prepared a place. Hopefully, one day soon, we'll find out. Until God decides to give us a reprieve, or until my work here is done, I'll just dream about fun things until I can see for myself.

Besides Groundhog Day, today was the wedding anniversary of two friends. One couple has been married 40 years and another for 52 years. That's definitely due a special night out for both these blessed and beautiful couples. Soon Valentine's Day will be here, so I hope the guys remember to double up since the two dates are so close. It's always so special to me when marriages are celebrated and honored, as they should be. It was the first covenant that God made with man, and it's the one that Satan tries to destroy. I'm grateful to both my parents and my grandparents for staying together even in very difficult times. I only wish my life could have been better. But, God in His grace and mercy has forgiven me, and He's washed me clean in the blood of Jesus Christ, so now I'm brand new and spotless to stand before Him one day the Bride of Christ, His Church. Thank You, Jesus, for the sacrifice You made in ransoming my soul from death. May I proclaim Your Word to everyone I meet!

In closing, bundle up or snuggle up, because it's going to continue to be cold a bit longer!  

Day 32 Answering the Call

 

2/1/2026

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart,

as working for the LORD, not for human masters."

Colossians 3:23

 

A few days before the end of January, when I went to my mailbox I found a gift from a ministry I respect, called Strength and Grace daily devotional. I must say that it came at an opportune time when all the world seemed to be in total chaos, and once again my life appeared to be following apart. Then entered a winter watch with snow and freezing rain. We are still digging out of that one, but God, in His grace and mercy, kept us from losing power. Others were not as fortunate. This past weekend we were threatened once more with snow, and although it did snow, there was little accumulation. I was so thankful!

There used to be a time when I loved snow, but when I see the careless risks people take, it makes me want to stay inside the house and off the road. It's interesting that people are always anxious to take risks, except when Sunday morning rolls around, and the church is open. That's when many decide to stay in their flannel pajamas, snuggled in bed, choosing live stream services. I remember when I lived right across the street from my church. I taught Sunday School, so I had to be there, and I loved sharing the word with the children. I remember being late one day, and I ran out the house with wet hair. When I entered the church I had ice in my hair, because it was so cold in Northern New Mexico. It still makes me laugh. I was much younger then, and I didn't think about risking getting sick from wet hair. Fortunately, God has always watched out over me, especially when I did not use the best judgment. Now I use a hair dryer before I dash out in frigid weather!

I live across the highway and up the road from the church now, and in the warmer weather I do walk to church, but it's been so cold I haven't walked this winter. Since I don't have a car at the moment, and my ride to church was not going, I have remained home for a few weeks. I miss the face to face fellowship when I can't make it to church, and we are told in scripture not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together. We need the friendship and community it provides, and there is the worship and sharing of the Word of God. The church of Acts was community oriented, but it was much different from today's churches, for the most part. We need to get back to the way Jesus ordained the church to be. Back then the disciples were turning the world upside down with the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Many were added to the church daily. There were home churches and continual fellowship. This is what I miss, because I enjoyed this type of church meetings before we moved to New Mexico. I was hoping that once I returned that I'd find the same reception, but so far, I have not. Everyone is more about building their own church and following their own set agendas than flowing with the Spirit of God, allowing Him to lead the service. There are exceptions to this, however, as I know one church for certain where God has the say so. Sadly, it is not in my area, but perhaps one day I'll be able to visit. I miss the days of prayer at the altar, people weeping, crying out to the Lord in repentance. It reminded me of old time revivals where the worship leader would play each verse of "Just As I Am," in the hope some would come forward. Today, I participated in a national prayer and repentance meeting online. I'm so glad that I made time in my schedule to attend and participate. We so desperately need that at this time.

My heart so aches for children, especially foster children who are lost in the system. This is why I am so grateful to our First Lady Melania Trump's programs for these forgotten children. She has been working with the foster care system for years, and her program "Fostering the Future" and "Be Best Initiative" will make much-needed change possible for children in the foster care system. Over the years the State has been charged with this responsibility; however, the system has been broken and many have fallen into the cracks of government, but hopefully, with the help of these initiatives hope will come for a brighter tomorrow for these children who deserve to live a better life and a richer one. They are so special and precious in God's eyes, and they are valued beyond silver and gold and the riches of this world. They are blessed from above and created in the image of God! Even the Declaration of Independence was written with them in mind: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." The words "created" and "endowed by their Creator," prove that our nation was founded on Biblical values right from the start. Amazing Grace!

Back in the day social services wasn't in existence, and it was the responsibility of the church to care for orphans, homeless, or widows who had no immediate family. People would open their doors to help others, but the people who heard God's voice and chose to help were always too few, or they did not have a financial means to help. Jesus spoke about taking care of widows, homeless, and orphans, but few churches pay attention to His clear mandate these days. 

Our modern day churches have strayed so far from the church Jesus declared it should be. Over the years whenever anyone didn't agree with this or that a new denomination would be organized. Jesus never said it should be that way, nor did the disciples. Today I heard a favorite song, and I remember Peter Marshall loved it, "Give Me That Ole Time Religion." May the church arise and shine and bring all the glory back to the only one who is due it - Jesus Christ our Savior and Lord! To Him be all honor, glory, and praise. Amen.   

Day 31 Our Provider of All Good Gifts

 

1/31/2026

"And Moses said to the children of Israel,

'See, the LORD has called by name Bezalel the son

of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah; and He has

filled him with the Spirit of God, in wisdom and understanding,

in knowledge and all manner of workmanship."

Exodus 35:30-31  

 

Today's reading is about building the tabernacle from the plans the LORD had designed down to the minutest detail. He had given special designing skills and artistry to Bezalel, son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, and Oholiab from the tribe of Dan, so they would be able to design and build the tabernacle to the exact precision and finest detail God had ordained. The women were given abilities to dye and make the threads to weave into cloth fabrics needed for the tabernacle and for the special linens and garments of the high priest, Aaron, and his sons. Each time I read the descriptions of the tabernacle and the clothes worn by Aaron and his sons, my finite mind cannot not imagine the enormity of it all. When Moses asked the people to bring gold and jewelry and other articles from their possessions to be used in making the utensils and ornaments found in the tabernacle and in the actual building of the tabernacle, they did not hesitate but were faithful to bring more than was needed. They did so with great joy and thanksgiving unto the Lord, which is the way God ordained that it should always be. They gave so freely, each day bringing more and more, until the workman had to tell Moses to make them stop. Imagine how that would be if today people gave with such generosity and love.

God's gifted the women, Bezalel, Oholiab, and others with special abilities to create such fine tapestries embroidered with thin threads of gold and with fine threads of blue, purple, and scarlet, and the capability of fashioning lamp stands and bowls and tables with engraving and other elaborate workmanship. In just reading about the sheets of tapestries for covering the tabernacle, I was unable to visualize how it may have looked or keep the lengths and widths separate. It just boggled my mind, and I'm a seamstress! It makes me wonder if prior to these new skills given if either Bezalel or Oholiab designed or created curtains or furniture or fashioned items covered in gold before?! Were they born with these gifts or anointed for this work alone?!

We are each given gifts and talents, and I believe that they are meant to be used, not just enjoyed now and then. I remember my older son becoming very upset with me for "squandering" my talent and not taking it to where it could go. I realize that my imagination and creative abilities have been a huge blessing to me, as they provided income to kept food on the table and clothes on my children's backs. When the store was failing and inventory was low, I made many gifts to sell in the stores. When I was starting over after my divorce crafting and sewing provided income, so I could pay my bills. I started an online business called "Memories by Linda," and I designed teddy bears from old clothing belonging to the person to be remembered. I was asked to do many different projects, and people seemed to be very happy. Eventually, my "real" job became too stressful, and my creative side shut down. I was on my own again, much older, and I didn't know what to do. It seems as if during those times that the Lord opened many doors for me to learn new skills and improve the old ones. Of course, with anything, I do have regrets, and because of accidents where I sustained blows to my head, I cannot always remember all the people I served. For the most part I remember faces, and I can eventually figure out in which filing cabinet they are located. I hope I kept all the old files, as it would be wonderful to relocate the old records and requests. Who knows, perhaps it would encourage me to start another business. 

I still have the dream of opening a home for other "misfits" like myself where I can provide a home and meals plus train them to use their creative skills to gain confidence, new skills, and learn to create a viable livelihood for themselves. Sometimes all someone needs is a little encouragement and someone to believe in them. I learned so much from my mother and grandmother when I was growing up, plus God gave me a few unique abilities also. I still love learning new things, so perhaps I may be able to walk alongside someone again one day, so they can make a difference in their own lives. I think we should never stop dreaming, and I hope that I never do. I also trust in the scripture found in Luke 12:48: "For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required." If God blessed us with talents, wealth, knowledge, or time, then we need to use these gifts in helping others and even changing the world in some instances. What a wonderful way to live life with purpose.