Day 62 - Dawn is Coming

 

"Not knowing when the dawn will

come I open every door."

Emily Dickenson

As usual after working extremely late hours it is difficult for me to stay awake to write my daily blog thanking God for something he has shown me or a special blessing I have experienced during my day. Last night I drifted off to sleep, as it was not night, but actually 2 am in the morning when I turned off my work computer and headed into my room for the night.

The quotation above comes from my 365 Day Brighteners book given to me by my Pastor Christmas before last.  I have purposed to use it as part of my every day devotionals this year, as it offers "Whispered Words of Encouragement" such as this one by Ms Dickenson.  I must admit that I was so tired last night that I couldn't appreciate the depth of meaning I am certain she implied from this quotation from one of her collected poems on nature. There is a second line to the very short poem, so the entirety of it reads:

 "Not knowing when the dawn will come I open every door;

Or has it feathers like a bird, Or billows like a shore?"

I really do not know for certain what practicality or obscurity existed in her mind, but I feel that it is a quotation concerning expectations of what the day will bring and the anticipation she has for the encounter. She devoted much time to study, reflection, and conversation with nature and the God of creation. She was quite reclusive in her lifestyle, so she learned to see and understand life and its teachings by listening and observing, and in her poetry...doing.

Some have thought her mad, and I believe those who choose to listen and reflect rather than be always listening to themselves speak, are considered "mad" or "mentally ill."  And if you care to study mental illness you will note that several authors, composers, great thinkers of the day have all been labeled with a modern day mental illness diagnosis. I think that if that is what it means to have a mind that thinks and an enthusiasm beyond the comprehension of another, then yes I would be considered mentally ill and happy for the scrutinizing "label."

My day yesterday was full, fast, maddening in many ways, as it seemed to be a day when I was faced with multiple difficulties coming to me in the form of emails, phone calls, texts, and even in the reading of notes within a case. But yesterday I witnessed first hand that there are still people who reach out in their humanity, goodness, kindness to help a fellow Samaritan lying crippled by the road. I am always asked for success stories of which I have been a part, and this one case is a miracle in the making. It is far from over, yet it gives me hope that working together with others dedicated to helping someone without asking for "honorary mention" in a post, we can truly be the hands and feet of Jesus in a small area of the world where needs are overwhelming. This is my mission field, and these are the people I love. Thank You, Jesus, for these special ones who give so freely from their hearts and from their abundance or need. May they be blessed one hundred fold.

After that most gracious encounter of God's love at work, I returned home to finish off my day in preparation of returning to work on Thursday.  Unfortunately satan is still active and operating in this world today, and invariably his purpose is to steal our joy, kill any meaning to our existence, and destroy us by using others to bring undeserved scrutiny our way.

Emails are a wonderful form of communication, but they are also a means to belittle another person with the supposed superiority of another.  I may be misunderstanding, but it seems that in the past four weeks I have encountered much disapproval by certain ones (or one) who are determined to disprove or disavow my knowledge of many years of working with the State and understanding of the work processes necessary in these programs. It is very disturbing to me that a "panel" of such persons would schedule a meeting to discuss a case with me, when a simple call from the one person with whom I have been speaking would end any misunderstanding or confusion. Courtesy and politeness no longer exist in many facets of our dealings today, and it is a sadness that wrenches my heart and causes me much concern for our future.  Of course many of you reading this blog will understand that this is becoming the "norm," because of the soon coming day of the appearing of Christ. Although my heart cries out to Jesus to hasten His coming, I do not want to see others not find their way. There is absolutely no one I would want to remain behind in that terrible day of suffering beyond all imagination. So my prayer is simply this, dear ones, please pray that when I am approached by or surrounded by those who would wish to question my purpose or intent that I would follow the words found in Colossians 4:5-6 "Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."